Bruising My Heart
by Carebear96
Summary: Clary has been abused by her father since the age of ten when her mother left her and her father. seven years later she meets Jace Wayland, a boy who helps her learn that there is more to life than being hurt. But what happens when her mother comes back and a brother that she didnt know she had surfaces his head? Please read and Review, I promise a good story with LONG chapters :)
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys, this is my new story and I hope you enjoy it. Just under this short introduction will be a quick summary of the story that I couldn't fit in the short summary. Now this story does contain rape and abuse, so if that isn't your type of read or it offends you in anyway, I am warning you now ****Do Not Read It!**** It would be so much easier than leaving me hate reviews after each chapter – No offence. Also in each chapter I will include a playlist of songs. But anyway here's the summary:**

_Clary Fray lives in the small town of Idris with her father Valentine Morgenstern. Clary uses her talents of art and singing to help escape the pain of the abuse that her father brings onto her by expressing her emotions. Her best friends, Simon Lewis and Magnus Bane try to help Clary in every way possible, but there isn't much they can do. Clary self-harms and even once tried to commit suicide before Simon came along to stop her. Clary believes that there is no hope for her until the new and rich family move in across the street from her from the big city, New York. Will a certain blonde headed arrogant teenage boy be able to change her views on the world that she lives in? But most importantly, will he be able to save her from self-destructing herself and pull her out of her depression and save her from the clutches of her psychotic father?_

**So there is the summary, in the next chapter will be chapter 1 so, review what you think so far and hopefully, the first update won't be too far away! :) **


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 1 – just another bruise

**Please note, that with some songs I will be posting the lyrics because it will be because either Jace or Clary will sing them, or because the lyrics will have meaning or importance to the scene, and if you read them the scene will make a lot more sense, but I won't do it with every song I put in the playlist at the start of each chapter. :)**

**Disclaimer: I'm only going to be doing this once, (because it is obvious I don't own TMI) but, all rights and reserves and Characters belong to Cassandra Clare, except for the Characters I make up ;)**

**Playlist:**

Dirty Little Secret by All American Rejects. **(Scene 1 with Jocelyn and Valentine)**

Never Again by Nickleback **(Scene 2 with Clary and Valentine)**

Airplanes by B.o.B feat Hayley Williams **(Jace and Clary)**

_Flashback:__ 7 years ago_

"_I just can't do this anymore Valentine! I just can't pretend! I'm done!" Jocelyn yelled furiously as she threw clothes into a suitcase. _

"_You can't be done Jocelyn. Did you forget our wedding vows? 'Till death do us part'?" counted Valentine as he grabbed the clothes that Jocelyn had just put in the suitcase and threw them back on the floor. _

"_Of course I remember Valentine, but it just doesn't mean anything to me anymore." Jocelyn then paused as another thought struck her and she reached down and pulled off her wedding ring and threw it on the bed. "There! Have it back and give it to a woman who can give you what you want!"_

"_You are what I want Jocelyn! Jesus! That's why I married you!" _

"_But you are not what I want!" Jocelyn screamed. _

_They stopped just staring at each other silently for several heartbeats, both breathing heavily. _

"_What do you want Jocelyn? What do you want and I'll give it to you." Valentine said after a while in a dead voice. You could tell that he was getting tired of the fight and wanted it over with. _

"_I want this divorce Valentine. I'm sorry, but I have more waiting for me out there." Jocelyn said sadly and stopped her packing to look at her now ex-husband. _

"_You mean someone. There is someone out there waiting for you." Valentine said coldly. _

"_Valentine, I'm sorry. I never meant for you to find out this way-" Jocelyn began but was cut off once again by Valentine. _

"_You mean you didn't want me to find out that you were having an affair with that idiot?!"_

_Jocelyn sighed and ran a frustrated hand through her long, red locks. "He is not an idiot Valentine. His name is Luke."_

"_How is a book shop owner supposed to support you in life Jocelyn? You won't be able to get anywhere." _

"_I don't care Valentine, because unlike you, my world doesn't revolve around how much money I have, or how big my house is, and I most definitely do not find the need to flaunt it in front of everyone."_

"_I do not flaunt." Valentine said defensively. _

"_Yes you do!"_

_Jocelyn's head was suddenly whipped to the side as Valentine's left hand cracked against her cheek. Jocelyn blinked and put a hand to her cheek and looked at Valentine stunned. Never in their ten years of marriage had Valentine _ever_ raised a hand against her and he most definitely had never hurt her either. _

_Jocelyn stepped back and grabbed her suitcase as she did and slowly started backing out of the room suddenly terrified. She grabbed her ten year old daughter's hand, Clary, and began walking out of the house towing Clary along with her. Suddenly she could hear thunderous steps behind her and could hear Valentine's raised voice. _

"_Where do you think you are taking her Jocelyn?" Valentine demanded. _

"_I'm not leaving her here with you Valentine; she is coming with me where she will be safe." Jocelyn fought. _

"_No! If you leave I get Clary otherwise, stay your ass here and you can still see her every day. Otherwise if you leave now, you'll never see her again. Mark my words." _

_Jocelyn hesitated and stopped just on the front door. Outside she could see Luke waiting for her in the car and was shooting her concerned looks. Jocelyn bit her lip nervously and looked down between her daughter and Luke. _

"_Mummy?" _

_Jocelyn looked down at the little girl who resembled her so much that it was startling. Her wild and fiery red hair was carefully controlled by being pulled back into a ponytail. The light matter of freckles that were across her nose and the bright green eyes that would haunt Jocelyn for the rest of her life after making her decision. Jocelyn dropped her bag and knelt down beside her daughter and looked her right in the eyes. She could see the start of unshed tears in Clary's eyes and could read the fear and the concern in the depth of her eyes and Jocelyn's insides twisted with guilt. But she had to do this. Jocelyn had to do it for herself. _

"_Clary, sweetie. Mum has to leave now, and I don't know when you will see me next. But you will be ok, alright? And I will come back for you Clary never forget that, and I'm only a phone call away babe. If you need anything, anything at all, all you have to do is ring me and I will come right back and get you alright?" Jocelyn said. _

_Little Clary nodded and looked down at the scrap bit of paper that Jocelyn had hurriedly scribbled her number down on and handed to Clary. _

"_Mum, please don't leave. Stay here with me and dad," Clary pleaded with her mother. _

_Jocelyn grimaced and enveloped Clary in a hug. One she feared would be the last. The last time that she would hold, and may even see her daughter. _

"_I can't baby. I have to leave. I have to do this for me." _

"_But what about me Mum?"_

"_You will be fine Clary. I promise."_

_Jocelyn then stood up and kissed her daughter one last time on the forehead before racing out the door without a single glance back at either Clary or Valentine. _

_Clary watched heart-brokenly and Valentine coldly as Jocelyn climbed in the passenger's side of the green Ute and drove away without even looking back. _

_After that, a year later, Valentine and her moved to Idris and that was when Valentine started to stumble home drunk from the bar and start hitting and beating Clary badly. He would be that drunk that he would miss work and ended up getting fired, so Clary and Valentine had now degraded from the very nice and fancy house they had in Brooklyn to a shabby and crappy house in the Bronx areas and the rough areas of Idris. The areas where people were typically stabbed and raped when walking home late at night, but her father warned her that if she was home before seven o'clock at night then she would be safe. _

_But she wasn't safe._

_A year after living in Idris, and Clary was twelve, Valentine began to beat her. He would make her cook him dinner and if she didn't have it hot and on the table for him when he came home there would be hell to pay. She also had to make sure the house was spotless and clean every morning before she went to school and every night before he came home from the bar. _

_When Clary was fourteen, he began to rape Clary. While he was raping her, he would tell her how it was all her fault that Jocelyn had left him and her and then he would take his frustrations out on her. He would then finish by beating her until she was black, blue and bleeding or unconscious, and then Clary would be left to her own devices to getting herself to bed and school each morning. _

_They lived a good thirty kilometres away from the school so it was an hour's walk to and from school every morning and afternoon and then she would be in a rush to clean and cook before Valentine came home. _

_Her best friends Simon Lewis and Magnus Bane knew of her beating that she received from her father every night and knew about the sexual assault as well, but were sworn to secrecy by Clary because she told them how if Valentine found out that anyone knew, he would kill Clary and those who that knew. Clary not wanting to put her friend's lives in danger made them swear to not tell anyone which they thankfully never did. They just helped Clary fix her injuries and help her up the stairs when her legs were unable to support her weight by carrying her up the stairs themselves. _

_Every night Clary would self-harm and cut her wrists. She knew that she shouldn't and that it gets her nowhere and solves nothing, but the bliss of the stinging kiss that the razor brought when it came in contact with her skin made her forget everything going on in her life at the moment. It made all the bad stuff seem not so bad. As Clary said to Simon and Magnus when they would scold her for cutting she would say "the physical pain makes the emotional pain go away." That and it also for a moment made her forget everything that her father does to her every night. _

_When Clary was fifteen, she was in the process of committing suicide, by tying a rope around the pole of the swings in the park near the school when Simon, who lived nearby, decided that would be a good time to visit the park and saw Clary and what she was trying to do and stopped her immediately then held her for an hour as she cried into his shoulder. That night when Clary got home she received the worst beating she had ever got off Valentine because she hadn't cleaned the house or had his meal cooked ready. He broke four of her ribs, fractured an ankle and left bruises all over her torso, arms and face. _

_That was the day that neither Simon nor Clary liked to think about. Simon didn't like to think about it because it was the day he could have lost his best friend. Clary didn't like to think about it because it was the day that she had finally given into the darkness and her emotions and broke down. _

_Now, two years later, since then Clary had not cried, screamed, yelled or complained. Not once. Not when her father beat her or raped her. And not even when the popular and bitchy girls Aline and Kaelie and their little groups picked on her and made fun of her for wearing long pants and long sleeves every day. _

_But Clary knew that one day the light from the other end of the tunnel would shine down on her and she would get her freedom. What she didn't expect was how soon it would come – two years later when she was seventeen and in senior year with Simon and Magnus. That was the year when everything started to change. _

_End of Flashback._

.o.O.o.

**(Present time and Clary is now seventeen and in senior year.)**

'_Ok,'_ Clary Fray thought. _'Dinner is cooked, lounge, kitchen, bathroom and dining room are clean and Valentine's bed is made ready. I haven't forgot anything…right?'_ she thought worriedly while she chewed on her bottom lip nervously and hurriedly ate her bowl of soup while Valentine's roast lamb and vegetables stayed in the microwave so that it stayed hot. Valentine knew to go the microwave every night and that was where he would find his dinner which Clary would specially make for him each and every night.

Finishing her dinner Clary went over and washed her dishes and then trudged up the stairs to her small bedroom.

As Clary pushed open the door she looked around bleakly at the room that had once been her sanctuary from her father until he invaded this space as well. Usually he would beat her in the living room or the hall and rape her in her bedroom.

She sighed as she made her way up the stairs and closed the door behind her. She would hear her father if he came home.

She sat on her bed and pulled out her English homework and started on the essay that they had to write. She grabbed her iPod out of her pocket and flicked through her playlist before settling on the song _'The Rock Show'_ by Blink 182. As she sat there doing her homework she found herself singing along to the words of the song and bopping her head in time with the beat.

After a while however, she got tired of writing the essay and started doodling in the corner of her page. When she had finished the picture she pulled her hand away to see that she had drawn a picture of an eye.

She was just starting to pull out her sketch pad when she heard the front door bang shut. She had hidden her sketch pad under her bed in fear that her father would find it and see all the depressing pictures she had drawn.

Her sketch pad to her was like a diary. Instead of writing down what she felt she would draw it. A few of the pictures were of her father abusing her, or of her crying in the corner of a very dark and gloomy room that seemed to be caving in on her. It was something that was solely hers and she _never_ showed it or spoke of it to anyone.

Clary quickly hid the sketch pad and pulled her homework back towards her when she suddenly heard her father calling her from downstairs.

"Clarissa! Get your lazy ass down here right now!" Valentine screamed.

Terrified Clary got up from her bed and made her way swiftly down the stairs and into the kitchen where she found her father standing beside his dinner. On the table was Valentine's roast lamb dinner and it was still steaming hot.

"What's wrong?" She asked hesitantly.

Valentine pointed at the meal and regarded her with a look filled with hate. It was clear that he was beyond drunk because he couldn't even focus on her properly and he was swaying on his feet where he stood.

"What the hell is that?" He asked still pointing at the meal.

Clary looked at it confused. "Roast lamb," she answered.

Valentine narrowed and reached out gripping her by the collar of her shirt and lifted her slightly off the ground.

"I know that you smart arse. I want to know when the roast beef is." He snarled.

'_Well you should have asked that in the first place._' Clary thought but in reality she stayed silent.

"Well?" Probed her father.

"I-I didn't make roast beef, only l-lamb." She stuttered.

Her father got this angry glint in his eye as he literally threw her across the room and she slammed into the wall where she slumped to the floor in a heap. Her hip and shoulder were shooting pains down her spine from where they took the brute of the hit.

"You're pathetic Clarissa! You cannot do anything right can you?" He yelled as he gripped her by the top of her arms and held her against the wall.

"Dad, please let me go," she whimpered.

"Shut up! You're nothing more than a slut are you?" He sneered and Clary felt tears brim her eyes though she refused to let them fall, so she blinked them back. She never cried. _Never._

He then slapped her face to one side only to knock it back the other way with his closed fist.

"Don't you dare talk back to me! Learn some respect young lady!" He yelled while kneeing her in the stomach to effectively wind her.

Needless to say, Clary didn't even back-chat him. Clary didn't say anything, but you just couldn't get through in his alcohol hazed state. As he kicked her again her body gave in and she fell to the floor helplessly. All Clary could do was wait until he was finished so that she could drag herself up the stairs and wipe the blood off of her body and then distribute herself in bed for the night, hoping that she could heal all these bruises and scars over night, but knowing that they never would.

After about an hour and several cracked ribs, a fractured wrist, too many bruises to count and several cuts, Valentine finally went to bed. Clary laid there for several minutes, in too much pain to move but after about ten minutes of lying on the floor Clary knew she had to move. Clary slowly got to her feet and gripped the counter for support as she stood. Clary waited several seconds to allow her legs the time to get use to the weight before she headed up the stairs.

Once there Clary went into the bathroom and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She hated what she saw almost instantly. What she saw first after she had stripped off all of her clothes was all the scars and bruises. Then she saw the pale skin and the barely there chest that she had, and her skin that was littered with freckles everywhere. Her jade green eyes were dull and no longer held the bright spark that they use to and the softness in her face was gone, and was instead replaced with a hardness that refused to let anyone in her life and show them what her life was really about.

Clary sighed as she ran the water in the shower and then jumped in. the relief of the hot water running over her sore and aching muscles was instantaneous. Clary leaned against the shower wall, too tired to wash her body down and she looked down at the swirling water at her feet that was tinted red from her blood with a bitter resentment. Clary don't know how long she was in the shower for but eventually the water started to run cold so Clary took that as her cue that it was time to hop out.

After changing into her pyjamas and brushing her teeth, Clary limped back into her bedroom where she collapsed into bed and set her alarm for six o'clock in the morning. It then didn't take long for her to fall asleep and escape to the world of her dreams.

.o.O.o.

The next morning, Clary was too sore to move. Clary wanted nothing more than to lie in her bed for the rest of the day and not to move. Or better yet, just to die, that way she would never have to put up with her dad's crap ever again. But Clary knew that if she did die that Simon and Magnus would never forgive her.

Clary had often thought about running away and finding her mother, but didn't for two reasons. Number one, because she was _certain_ that Valentine would find her before she could even get two steps out the door, and then Clary would probably receive the worst beating she ever has in her life.

And two; because she hated and resented her mother for abandoning her when Clary needed her mother the most. How could her mother leave her in the hands of her abusive father?

Groaning, Clary pulled herself out of bed and got dressed for the day. She crossed her bleak room with the peeling wallpaper, over to her small closet where she stood, debating over what to wear. She ended up deciding on a pair of blue jeans that were ripped at the knees and along the bottoms, a green singlet with a plain white long sleeve top that was cut down to the top of her breasts and a black hoodie thrown over the top. Clary closed her wardrobe and walked to the end of her bed where she stuffed her feet into her black converse shoes that were splattered with paint, and then made her way down stairs.

She made herself a cup of coffee and two pieces of dried bread with butter for breakfast and then sat at the table wondering what today would bring.

Today was the first day back after midyear break, and she hadn't seen either Simon or Magnus for the best of the two weeks. She knew that they both would be anxious to see her just to confirm to themselves that she was still alive and that her father hadn't killed her, which he had come close to doing a number of times.

Clary finished her breakfast and got up and washed her dishes in the sink. It was times like these that she wished that they had a dishwasher to save her time, but no. her wage that she got from working five nights a week at the bar was only enough for her father to pay the bills with and to buy alcohol with. Whatever was left – or _if_ there was money left – was for Clary.

After she had washed the dishes, including those from last night that her father had made and got rid of a broken scotch glass, which she had no idea how her father had broken it, she moved up stairs to do her hair for the day and brush her teeth.

After one look in the mirror, Clary knew that she would have to wear make-up today – there was no escaping it.

Purplish bruises were visible under her left eye and the bottom of her right cheek. Applying the foundation, she winced slightly as she brushed the make up over the bruises – thick enough so that you couldn't see the bruises unless you knew they were there. She then applied some mascara and eyeliner, with a light covering of blush to add some colour to her pale features and after debating about it, she left her hair down to cascade down her back to help hid the bruises on her cheeks, jaw and shoulders.

Heading back to her room, Clary grabbed her brown messenger bag from the foot of her bed, and headed to the back of the house to put a load of washing on that she would later hang out when she got home. Then she left through the back door and exited the house through the side gate and started the hour long walk to school. At times like these Clary wished they lived closer so that she didn't have to walk the thirty kilometres to school every morning. Most of the time, she was exhausted by the time she got to school.

Clary pulled out her iPod and began listening to the song '_Airplanes_' by B.o.B featuring Hayley Williams and started singing to the chorus and first verse.

_Can we pretend that airplanes, in the night sky are like shooting stars?_

_I could use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now._

_Can we pretend that airplanes, in the night sky are like shooting stars?_

_I could use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now._

_Yeah, I could use a dream or a genie or a wish_

_To go back to a place much simpler than this_

'_Cause after all the glitz and the glam and the fashion,_

_And all the pandemonium and all the madness_

_There comes a time when you fade to the blackness_

_And when you starin' at the phone in your lap_

_And you hopin' but them people never call you back_

_But that's just how the story unfolds,_

_And you get another hand soon after you fold_

_And when you plans unravel in the sand_

_What would you wish for if you had one chance?_

_So airplane, airplane, sorry I'm late. _

_I'm on my way, so don't close that gate_

_If I don't make that then I'll switch my flight _

_And I'll be right back at it by the end of the night. _

Clary stopped singing to think about the lyrics to the song. Obviously the person wanted an escape through a wish, and that is exactly what she wanted. The only way Clary could escape was by the miracles of a wish that had to be granted. But wishes only came true to those who deserved them, people who weren't like her, and that is the reason she was an atheist.

If there was a God, and he was real. Then why was she given the life she was given when all the Christians claimed that God only wanted the best for everyone? Where was the happiness in her life with an abusive father, and when she busted her gut every week night at the bar just to pay the bills that Clary's father _should_ be paying, so she can have a roof over her head? Where was the happiness in that?

But Clary was used to being overlooked, and it always seemed to be the people who didn't need the wishes have them. Like wealthy people winning the lotto, or high class business men getting promotion after promotion and earning ridiculous amounts of money, while she worked long hours for shit all pay. The world had a very strange definition of _fairness._

Clary looked up from the ground when she heard a car going past her. Clary only had enough time to see that there were three teenagers in the car. Two with black hair and one with blonde. The blonde one driving. As they drove past her, Clary could swear she felt the blonde teen watching her in the rear view mirror and she shuddered involuntarily with a sudden chill.

Hanging her head she trudged on to school, pulling her coat tighter around her body when the cold started seeping through the material. Clary cast a look up at the sky and saw that it was turning greyish and looked as if it was getting ready to rain. Thinking of the makeup she was wearing that she didn't want washed off her face, she quickened her pace.

Fifty minutes later Clary was walking through the front gates of the school, with having ten minutes free before classes began.

She immediately started for her, Magnus's and Simon's hangout spot near the back of the canteen on the bleachers where they met every morning before school. Simon was the first one to see her when he glanced up from his manga magazine – almost as if he could sense her approaching – and ran towards her.

"Clary!" He shouted as he discarded his book on the bleachers and took them down two at a time to reach her.

"Hey Si," She called back with a light chuckle but grew worried when she saw that Simon wasn't slowing his pace. "Whoa, Si, careful!" She exclaimed throwing her hands up in front of herself to defend her beaten body and immediately Simon halted in his tracks.

Magnus who had somehow appeared right beside Simon looked her up and down.

"Are you alright Clary?" He asked worriedly giving her a light squeeze after Simon had.

Clary grimaced and shrugged her shoulders. Something both Simon and Magnus knew she did whenever she was hurting rather badly that day.

Magnus felt his fists clenching at his sides sub-consciously as he caught sight of a covered bruise along her jaw. How anyone could do such a thing to someone so small and delicate, he didn't know.

Clary who saw Magnus clenching his hands stepped forward to take his hands in hers to calm him down.

"I'm fine Magnus, really. I'm fine," she said, but she didn't look as if she believed her own words.

"Uh Huh," Magnus muttered and then gently grabbed Clary's chin in his gasp. "Then tell me how old this one is?" He said and then looked closely at her face. "And, how old this one here is too," He said running a careful finger underneath her left eye.

Clary jerked back as if he had shocked her. "They don't hurt," She said defensively.

Simon looked at her in disbelief while Magnus raised an eyebrow.

"Oh really?" challenged Magnus. "So if I do this…"

He reached out to poke the bruise under her eyes softly and Clary gasped while flinching away.

"Magnus! Please!" Clary begged, stepping back, with a hand covering the left side of her face.

Magnus stepped forward before she could retreat any further and wrapped his arms delicately around her fragile form.

"I'm sorry Clare-bear, I just worry about you," he whispered.

At first Clary was tense in his hold from the sudden contact, but like every other time, she melted into his protective embrace.

"I missed you too Maggie," she whispered.

She watched as Magnus scrunched his face up in a scowl. "Clary, darling, I know we all know that I'm gay, but you know how much I hate the name Maggie," he scowled her.

Clary chuckled softly before breaking off from the pain in her ribs. She winced slightly and if Magnus wasn't holding her, he might not have noticed. But because he was holding her he felt her flinch.

He pulled away and looked down at her with an expectant look. Clary not wanting to get into it tugged on his hand and started pulling him and Simon towards the school buildings after the bell had rung two minutes ago.

"If you don't want to talk about it Clare-bear, just say so." Simon said.

Clary stopped suddenly and both boys screeched to a halt. "I do say I don't want to talk about it, but you guys make me talk about it anyway!" She yelled.

Magnus looked at Simon and they exchanged a look. They knew something was different about their Clary. There was a part of her that had broken off from her, but they couldn't work out what it was. Her father must have done something even worse than usual to break the spirit that Clary had left. Now, she had none.

Simon opened his mouth to ask the question that both of them were thinking, but a quick, sharp look from Magnus made him shut it again.

"We're sorry Clare-bear," Simon said sincerely.

Clary's eyes widened as she had just realised that she had yelled at her two best friends. "Oh god! I'm so sorry I yelled at you!" she said quickly. "Please don't hurt me. I'm sorry!"

Simon and Magnus looked at each other again, but this time with alarm. Clary never, _never_, acted like this so something must have really happened to her.

"We won't hurt you Clare-bear. We're your best friends, we could never hurt you." Magnus said stepping towards her and slowly stretched his hand out so that she could see what she was doing. Clary watched him warily, and then stiffened when Magnus wrapped an arm around her.

Magnus ran his hand up and down her arm to try and sooth her. "Shh, Clary, it's alright. I promise I won't hurt you."

Clary looked up at Magnus surprised by herself. Had she really just allowed herself a moment of weakness? What was wrong with her?! Quickly she pushed Magnus off of her gently and smiled at him.

"I know Magnus. I know you won't hurt me. I don't know what got into me," she said. "I'm sorry."

Simon rolled his eyes and offered her his hand. After a brief hesitation she took it and they continued towards their first period class. "You're allowed to feel weak Clary. It's ok to need people. And for God's sake, stop apologising! It isn't your fault."

Clary grimaced as she pulled open the door to the entrance of the school. "I've been taught not to show weakness or emotions Si, I can't help it." She said, ignoring the apologising comment. She knew it bothered both Simon and Magnus how much she apologised, but she couldn't help it. It came as an instinct for whenever she done something wrong.

"Because of your dad?" He asked bluntly.

Clary winced internally as they reached her locker. "Yes."

"Your father's wrong Clary. You know that right?" Magnus asked her.

Clary looked at the ground, avoiding their eyes as she answered. "No his not," She whispered.

"But he is."

Clary looked up again and sighed as she opened her locker and pulled out her maths books for her first period maths class. Closing the locker door again she turned to address her two best friends.

"I have to go to class. I'll meet you guys at lunch at our spot," She said and started off down the hall but Magnus called after her.

"You can't avoid the subject forever Clary!"

A few people turned around to look at them so Clary ducked her head and walked quicker towards her classroom.

When she entered the classroom however, she found herself in a predicament. Her usual seat by the window in the back row was taken up by an unfamiliar boy with golden wavy hair. As she got closer, she could see that the boy looked very similar to the teenager with golden hair that drove past her in the car this morning.

He was wearing a light cotton t-shirt in the colour of a light, palish green, with denim shorts cut off at the knees. The runners that he wore and the carefree attitude that he seemed to have surrounding him, gave her the impression that he could be an athlete, and the muscles rippling up and down his arms just supported her theory. She saw that his abs stood out when he sat a certain way, making the material of his t-shirt pull tight across his stomach. His long, slender fingers were playing with a grey lead pencil as he juggled it from hand to hand between his fingers. But that wasn't the most startling thing about his appearance, nor was the fact that he was sitting in _her_ seat. But it was when his eyes flicked up to look at her as she stopped at the front of his table. His eyes were _gold_. Clary had never seen anything like it before. She had seen green eyes with flecks of gold in them, but this boys were purely… _gold._

The boy looked her up and down, assessing her body and looks, and Clary felt suddenly self-conscious under the scrutiny of his eyes, so she shifted from foot to foot.

The boy suddenly smirked at Clary. "Well, what was it that lured you over? My stunningly good looks or was it that you were hoping to exchange numbers?" He asked cockily as he stood up to stand in front of her. He thrust his hand out towards her for her to shake. "The name is Jace Lightwood."

Clary couldn't help but notice how _short_ she was compared to this boy. Next to him, the top of her head barely brushed his shoulders. Clary narrowed her eyes at his attitude and squared her shoulders. There was no way she was going to fall for this boy just because he was pretty to look at – ok, better than _pretty_ – or because he had a killer attitude. It was boys like this that were dangerous and were to be stayed away from.

Clary not wanting to look intimidated shook his hand. "Clary Fray. And neither of those reasons are why I'm over here. You're sitting in my seat. And I'd like it back thanks." She said.

The boy looked surprised that she wasn't affected by his charms but quickly composed himself and gave her a smug smile. "Clary Huh? Like the herb. Clary sage…" He broke off as he seemed to be thinking before he looked back at her and smiled. "I like it."

Clary glared as she realised that he had made no move to move his belongings to a new table.

"You don't have to like it Goldie-locks, I just want my seat." She snapped.

Jace grinned. "You're gonna have to fight for it." He challenged.

Shrugging, Clary darted around him and shoved his stuff off the table and onto the floor and took up the seat. Turning she gave Jace a triumph smile.

"Well, that's no way to treat a new student," Jace said, faking hurt.

Clary shrugged. "It's high school, not the Royal committee. Get used to it."

She then turned to the front of the class as the teacher began the lesson. She saw Jace slip into the seat beside her and glance at her every now and then.

That was how she met Jace Lightwood, and the day that her life started to change.

Only, she didn't know it just yet.

**So, really long chapter, awesome aren't I? So did you love it or hate it? Do you like the idea of the story line so far? What about Jace? Do you think I'm doing a good job at keeping him in character? I know some characters are OOC but tell me if they are getting too OOC. **

**Next chapter. Meeting the other lightwood sibling's maybe? What about Jace turning up at Clary's work? **

**Please review what you think. Is it good, bad? Or too long? Let me know! :D**

**Question of the day:**

**Who is your favourite Mortal Instruments character and why? Leave your comments in the reviews :)**

**Tell next time my lovelies xx**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2 – the golden boy

* * *

**Hey guys, I just want to point out two things before we get into the story, and these are IMPORTANT factors for the story so please read:**

**- First: A guest pointed out that Clary walking to school for an hour when it is only 30Km is a bit far-fetched, so lets pretend that it only takes her half an hour :P**

- **Second: I said in the first chapter that the Lightwoods live across the road from Clary when it was meant to be 3 blocks away, because the Lightwoods owning a mansion in the bronx areas of Idris... Yeah not gonna happen haha **

**so sorry about that little hic up guys :)**

* * *

Playlist:

The Anthem – Good Charlotte **(scene 1)**

Gangnam Style – PSY **(scene 2)**

Burn It Down –Linkin Park **(scene 2)**

Jump – Simple Plan **(scene 3) **

* * *

The first half of the day pasted slowly. As it turned out Jace was in four of her six classes. Great… he was in her math, English, music and art class. Clary knew she was in for a semester of torture.

It had felt like Clary had just closed her eyes and then when she opened them, lunch was here and she was sitting on the bleachers eating her turkey sandwich with Simon and Magnus.

"How was class?" Simon asked Clary.

Clary grimaced. "I have a jackass in my class." She said.

Simon arched an eyebrow. "You never think of anyone as a jackass, you're normally quite a temperamental person," he said.

Clary laughed without humour. "_Normally_, yes, but this guy has a shocking sense of humour through the use of sarcasm." She said bitterly.

Simon chuckled as he took another bit of his meat pie. "Do you want me to say something to him? Rough him up a bit? Teach him a lesson to stay away from you?" He offered.

This time Clary laughed genuinely. "Si, no offence, but if anything this guy would rough you up." She said.

Simon scowled and Magnus laughed at his expression. "What's his name?" Magnus asked.

"Jace," Clary answered.

"Mmm, is he gay?" asked Magnus.

Clary barked out a laugh. "No, Magnus. I am positive he is not."

"How do you know? Did you get seduced?" Magnus winked.

Clary made a disgusted sound. "I most definitely did not! He just seems like a chick magnet." She said.

"Is he good looking?" Magnus pressed.

This time Clary could feel the blush creeping into her cheeks as she went the colour of scarlet. Magus seeing her face chuckled. "I'm going to take that as a yes," he said.

"I never said that!" Clary said defensively.

"But you're face said it for you sweet heart," Magnus said.

This whole time, Simon had been watching the exchange between Magnus and Clary with critical eyes. When Magnus caught Simon's meaningful look he shut up.

"What's wrong?" Clary asked, seeing their silent exchange.

"Nothing," said Magnus smiling sweetly.

Clary frowned, but didn't press it, because she knew that they would tell her whatever it was when the time was right.

Just then a shadow caught Clary's attention and looked up to see Sebastian Velarc crossing the oval and making a line for them.

Clary looked at Simon and Magnus to see that they were just as confused as what she was. When Sebastian reached them he climbed up the bleachers to where they were sitting at the top and stood in front of Clary.

"Hey Clary," He greeted.

"Hey Sebastian," she said looking towards Simon and Magnus for help but they just gave her a look as if to say '_you're on your own_'. "I haven't finished the English essay if you wanted it, but when I'm done, you can have a look at it-" she broke off as Sebastian chuckled.

"I'm not here about the essay Clary," he said.

Clary frowned. "You're not?"

"No."

"Oh… well, what are you here for?" She asked hesitantly.

"I was wondering what you were doing Friday night." He said.

Clary was shocked. Was this, cool, popular guy that she barely knew asking her out on a _date_?

"I-I'm working," She replied flustered.

"You can't get the night off?" He asked hopefully.

"I need the money Sebastian." She said rather coolly.

"Well, how about Saturday night? Are you working then?" He asked rather irritated.

Clary shook her head. "No."

"Great, I'll pick you up at five." He said.

He started to walk off but Clary reached out and grabbed his sleeve. "Look Sebastian. You're someone I don't really know and I don't tend to go out with people I don't know." She said.

"That's why I want to take you out Clary, so I can get to know you. I like you Clary." He said.

"You can't like someone you barely know Sebastian." She scowled.

He laughed. "Sure you can Clary. So I'll pick you up at five?" This time it came out in a question.

I shook my head. "Sorry Sebastian. I'm not going out with you."

Sebastian glared at me now. "Are you saying that you are rejecting me?" He asked frostily.

She nodded but there was no courage behind the nod to back her up. As if Sebastian sensed this he pressed this to his advantage.

"No one rejects me, Clary. So as I said, I'll pick you up at five." His tone slightly threatening.

"You don't know where I live, so how can you pick me up?" Clary fired back. She smiled smugly at Sebastian's hesitant answer. _Gotcha_, she thought.

"It's a small town," He said with a shrug. "I'll ask around. Starting with these two." He said inclining his chin towards Magnus and Simon, who were watching her and Sebastian quietly, but critically. Magnus looked wary of Sebastian, and Simon – to put it plainly – looked pissed off.

"We won't tell you where she lives," Simon answered glaring.

Sebastian ignored him and turned back to me. "It would not be wise to reject me Clary," He said.

"Why is that?" She asked her voice quivering with nervousness.

"Because most of the school knows that you will be going out with me this weekend. And if you reject me everyone will know, I will make sure of that, and you will be an outcast for the rest of your life. People won't talk to you – hell, they won't even _want _to talk to you – if I tell them not to, and they will, because everyone does what I want Clary, and you are no exception."

Clary could feel her lower lip quivering, and knowing it was a sign of weakness she bit it, to stop it from moving. Clary opened her mouth to say that she didn't care what the rest of society thought of her as long as she always had Magnus and Simon by her side. If she had them, she couldn't care what everyone else thought, but then she heard her father's voice ringing inside of her head loud and clear.

"_Men are the superior race, Clary. You listen and do as they ask without any hesitation or any questions. If you don't, they will hurt you. Do you understand?" _he had asked her and scared her out her minds that he would hurt her; she nodded furiously and exited the room quietly.

Returning back to the present, she looked up at an expectant Sebastian.

Slowly she nodded her head and then let out a defeated sigh. "Alright Sebastian. I'll go out with you."

"_What?_" the startled gasp had come from beside her. Turning Clary saw Simon looking at her with his mouth hanging open.

"Great!" Said Sebastian, rubbing his hands together. "I'll pick you up tonight."

"Tonight? No, I told you I have work." She said.

"That's ok; I'll pick you up from the bar that you work at after you're your shift. I've seeing you working there, entertaining and serving behind the bar." He replied.

Clary just nodded stiffly, not daring to argue. "I finish at ten," She told him.

Sebastian flashed a smile. "Great, see you then Clary."

They watched him walking off, jumping down the bleachers two at a time, until he reached the ground where he then broke into a jog and ran off.

"What the hell, Clary?" Simon asked furiously once Sebastian was out of ear shot. "You told him no, and then you tell him _yes_?" he asked incredulously.

Clary looked at her feet, grasping the bleacher that she sat on tightly on either side of her. She breathed deeply to try and get rid of the fear that she felt inside at being alone with a male for a few hours.

"Clare-bear? Are you alright?" Magnus asked, ignoring the fuming Simon and bent down in front of her at her feet so he could look up into her eyes.

Clary looked into his eyes, but not before she had she wiped all emotions off of her face. The last thing she wanted was for Magnus to know that she was scared of one measly _date_. If he knew how terrified she was on the inside, he would never let her go.

Slowly, Clary met Magnus's eyes and swallowed the lump that seemed caught in her throat. "Yeah, I'm fine, thanks Magnus."

Clary swallowed guiltily. She hated lying, especially to Simon and Magnus, because they were only trying to protect her.

"You don't look fine Clare-bear. You are extremely pale," Magnus noted, still looking at her deeply.

Clary gave a small, but forced smile. "I'm always pale, Mag."

Magnus looked at her for a few more moments before he sighed and stood up. "You don't have to date Sebastian tonight if you don't want to Clary. I can come pick you up at ten like I do every other night."

Clary always protested against the lifts that Simon and Magnus always gave her. She told them she was perfectly capable of walking home each night after work, but both Magnus and Simon pointed out that she didn't want to be out after seven o'clock at night. She argued that the paedophiles that roamed the streets each night couldn't be any worse than her own father, but still, both boys persisted. So to ease their minds, she went along with them to keep them happy. If she couldn't be happy then the least she could do was help Magnus and Simon find theirs.

"No, Magnus, I will," She paused to take a deep breath. "I want to go out."

Magnus barked a laugh. "Sure you do Clare-bear. I can see it in your eyes how terrified you are."

"I'm not," she argued.

"We'll see," Magnus muttered just as the bell rang signalling the end of lunch.

Clary gathered her bag and then started walking down the bleachers towards class, all the while chewing her lower lip nervously over tonight.

* * *

The blinding lights and the fog-machine composed air, made it thick to breath in as Clary moved around the bar picking up the empty glasses and taking them out the back for washing. Her uniform made her uncomfortable around the drunken company of men that the bar attracted. In the early hours of the night when Clary's shift starts at four o'clock, was when the teenagers started turning up. It wasn't until around midnight when the older drunk men would start turning up and start ordering lap dances from the waitresses. If paid the right amount of cash, the men would usually get what they want.

The low cut short black skirt that barely covered to mid-thigh sat on her hips, and she wore fishnet stockings on her legs to hide the bruises. On top she wore a low cut white button up blouse with a black cardigan that she played off as being cold to get away with wearing it. Her boss preferred his waitresses to be skimpy to look like they belonged to the job they worked. Clary played the part well, with the uniform, and the too-much makeup that she wore to cover the bruises but her boss and co-workers just thought she was wearing it for the job. _Better to let them make up their own reasons than for them to know the truth, _Clary thought.

She passed another table, picking up the empty glasses that had been left behind and then swept over the table with the wet cloth that she had in her other hand.

Shoving through the crowd to get back to the kitchen, she winced when one of the dances elbowed her in her side, hitting her bruised ribs. Forcing herself not the double over as the breath was knock out of her, she kept moving to the kitchen where she put the glasses in the sink and Matt started cleaning them, not saying anything, only offering her a small, kind smile.

"Oi Fray!" she turned at the sound of her boss Marcus yelling out her name from his office.

"Yeah?"

"I need you to help Kaelie out behind the bar!" he yelled to be heard over the blasting sound of the music which was belting out the newest hit – Gangnam Style by PSY – and wherever she looked there were people everywhere in the pub doing the stupid dance.

Clary swallowed back a groan. Not only did Clary not like Kaelie, but she also happened to be the stuck up popular girl at Clary's school who seemed to make it her personal mission in life to make Clary's life as miserable as she could.

"Sure," clary muttered, knowing Marcus wouldn't hear her even if she had of shouted because he had already moved back into his office where she no doubt thought there would be a girl.

Clary sighed and pushed through the doors from the kitchen to enter the bar, she could see Kaelie flirting with a boy Clary recognised from school, while she served another customer at the other end of the bar.

Facing the amount of people that waited in line to be served she spoke to the man at the front. "What can I get for you?"

The man turned around and she noticed with a start that it was none other than Jace Lightwood, who looked down at her with an amused smile.

"Well, if it isn't our own feisty little redheaded friend here to make my night a pleasurable one," He said.

Clary sighed. "Can you make this quick, I'm busy." I said impatiently.

"I can make it as quick as you want it baby," He said with a wink.

Clary groaned. "Oh god. ID?" she asked.

"ID?" Jace asked as if it was a foreign word to him.

"You know? Personal identification?" Clary exaggerated. "I need to see it to serve you," she added.

"Can't you just serve me without it? You already know me," He said with a smirk.

Clary shook her head and crossed her arms over her chest. "No, I don't know you at all because you're too much of an arrogant asshole for me to want to get to know you. Now what do you want?" She asked sweeping her hand over the bar.

Jace looked at her for a few moments – almost looking as if he wanted to apologise for his behaviour – but the decided against it and smirked once more. "I'll just have a lemon and lime bitters with a shot of vodka in it." Jace said with a smile. He paused for a second before adding, "Please."

Clary who had started to move off to get his drink, accepting the fact that he wouldn't show his ID paused. Never in the day that she had known Jace Lightwood had he ever said please. In art, he simply just took a pencil from Clary without asking. She had just presumed he was one of these boys who never needed to say please, or had to ask. Clary just thought that a boy with those kind of golden looks – he would just get everything he wanted by batting an eyelash.

Clary looked back at Jace to see that he was giving her one of his genuine smiles. One she hadn't seen before, but decided instantly that she loved it. It lit up his whole face, showing the whites of his teeth and the light in his eyes. The way they would crinkle in the corners, and how the edges of his mouth would disappear in two groves lining his mouth. Just seeing him smile brought one of her own on her face.

Clary turned back, grabbing a glass off the back wall and using the hoses behind the bar to fill his drink up three-quarters before she pulled out a bottle of vodka filling the drink up the rest of the way, then giving it a stir with a spoon. She placed the drink down in front of Jace and smiled at him again, but this time kindly.

"Was that all?" She asked.

"Yeah," he said giving her a five dollar bill.

Clary went over and put the money in the cash register and then started to move to the next customer when she was called back by Jace.

"Clary."

Clary looked at him and went back to stand in front of him, placing her hands on the bar and leaned in to hear him over the pulsing music.

"What time do you get off?" He asked in her ear.

Clary stiffened and drew back slightly. Two boys in one day asking her out? But maybe she was reading too much into this. He did only ask what time she finishes, but the tone he used suggested anything but curiosity. The tone held a hidden meaning that he was challenging her to pick up on.

"In an hour. Why?" she asked narrowing her eyes slightly.

"Just curious," He responded before grabbing his drink and moving back out into the dancing crowd on the dance floor.

Clary blinked and stood frozen a few seconds before she visibly shook herself and moved to the drunken man beside her.

"How long does it take to get some fucking service around here?" He yelled slamming his fist down on the counter of the bar.

"Sorry," Clary apologised. "What can I get you?" She asked.

The man glared at her. "I know what you young ones are like. Too busy socialising and kissing your partners to get any real work done around here. They pay you to stand in the corner and chat up to boys all night." The man then spat on the counter and Clary could barely hold in her grunt of disgust.

"Did you want a drink? Or were you just going to stand there and rant all night?" Clary asked impatiently, feeling too tired to be polite tonight.

"Of course I want a drink you bitch. That's why I'm up here at the bar isn't it?" He snapped.

Clary eyed the man up and down. "Well, you don't look like you can handle another drink." She said honestly.

The man was slightly cross-eyed and he swayed on his feet, holding onto the counter for support while he completely ignored the barstool that stood right next to him.

"Don't tell me what I can and can't handle! Now pass me a bourbon whiskey will ya?"

Clary grimaced. "Sir, I really don't think-" she started but cut off as the man gripped her collar and brought her towards his face.

"I said, give me a bourbon whiskey," the man said and then gave her a slight shove as he pushed her away from him.

Clary's father's words echoed around in her head. _"Never disobey a man Clarissa. They are superior to you and you will always do as they command. Got it?"_

Frightened, Clary hurriedly fetched the man's bourbon whiskey and took the money that he slammed down on the counter for her, and then watched in relief as the man crossed to the other side of the room.

Kaelie was on the other side of the bar, and was shooting her looks of pure hatred as she served her own customers. What she had against Clary she'll never know. But when Jace stepped up to the bar, her cruel looks had intensified from a five to a nine in a matter of two minutes.

Clary saw that Kaelie was watching her serve the drunken man, while smirking evilly to herself and Clary felt as if a bucket of cold water had been tipped down her back, freezing her to the bone.

Clary had seen that look on Kaelie's face before, and the last time she had it was when Clary had been given a detention for placing the 'whore' sticky note that was placed on her locker back onto Kaelie's locker who placed it on hers.

Clary despite the feeling of dread coming over her pushed her shoulders back and continued serving, picking up empty glasses and wiping empty tables for the remaining hour until Marcus came out to tell her that she was finished for the night.

Kaelie ducked in the office before Clary and went in to check off with Marcus first, so she could leave first. When she came out she was grinning as big as the Chester Cat from the movie 'Alice in Wonderland'.

"See you around school, Clary," she said and wiggled her fingers in a farewell.

Clary sighed and went in the office to hang her waist apron up on the hooks and to show Marcus her pockets to show that she had no hidden tips in there. Marcus had clearly stated that when he hired Clary that at the end on each night she was to empty her pockets to show that she had no tips and if she had she was to hand them over to Marcus.

Clary handed him the five dollar note that she was given by a stranger and moved to leave through the door when Marcus called her back.

"Ah, Clary. Can I have a word for a moment please?"

Clary turned around to look Marcus in the eyes. She felt her stomach bottom out as she saw the look of disappointment on his face.

"What's up?" She asked as she took a seat in the one that Marcus waved for her to sit down in.

"Kaelie reported you serving a highly intoxicated man earlier tonight. A man who was well beyond his limits of alcohol intake for one night. You know our rules Clary, and the law."

Clary frowned thinking back, and then remembered the man who had begun to insult her. She groaned when she realised what Marcus was getting at.

"I know, and I'm sorry. But he started to threaten and insult me, and I didn't want any trouble so I just gave him a drink and he left me alone."

"I hope he did pay for it," Marcus demanded.

Clary nodded her head quickly. "Of course he did."

"Right, well I'm afraid you done the wrong thing tonight Clary. You broke the law and our rules." He said.

Clary frowned. "What are you trying to say?" she asked slowly.

"I'm afraid I have to let you go Clary," He said sadly, and seemed genuine about it.

"A-Are you firing me?" She asked in a whisper.

Marcus nodded wordlessly.

"But Marcus, you don't understand. I need this job. I need the money for my dad. I'm sorry about the wrong I done with the drunk man. It won't happen again. Just… Please…" she said finishing in a whisper.

Marcus paused for a second looking as if he was giving a second thought to his choices but in the end his mouth turned into a thin line and his eyes hardened.

"I'm sorry Clary, but I'm not taking back my decision. You need to leave."

"But what about my pay check?" she asked.

"I have it here." Marcus said and pulled out the yellow envelop from his draw in his desk and handed it to her. In it Clary knew she would find the three hundred dollars she got each week.

"I need this job Marcus," She said trying one more time as she stood up. "Please."

"I'm sorry Clary. Find another one," Marcus replied and held the door open for her.

Fighting back the tears that threatened to spill over she gathered what dignity she had left and left the office through the door in a huff.

Clary emerged into the bar and made her way around the opposite side off the bar to the side she was use to standing on.

Sliding onto one of the barstools Clary took out her pay check and looked inside. Sure enough she had the three hundred dollars in there. Clary gave one hundred dollars to her father each week for his alcohol and used the other two hundred to pay the bills with. Making a decision that she knew she would regret later she flagged down her co-worker Maia who took over her shift.

"Hey Clary, what are you still doing here?" Maia asked.

"I'm going to drink my sorrows." Clary said.

Maia frowned as she poured Clary a shot. "What's on your mind Hun?"

"Marcus just fired me." She said and then tipped her head back to swallow the shot of vodka.

Maia turned to her with her mouth hanging open in shock. "What? Why?"

"Kaelie told Marcus how I served a guy that was too drunk. So he fired me." Clary said glumly.

Maia grimaced and then slid another shot of vodka towards Clary. "Here Hun, this ones on me."

Clary smiled weakly. "Thanks Maia. You're the best." She said.

Maia shrugged, but a smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "Yeah, I know."

Clary watched as Maia moved to the other side of the bar to serve other customers. She sighed as she drained the second shot of vodka.

"There's the pretty face I've been looking for," said a voice behind her and when Clary turned, she saw Sebastian with his arms crosses, smirking down at her.

He wore plain jeans with a surfer t-shirt that defined his muscles well. His hair was tousled in a styled kind of way and his eyes – as black as onyx, held mischief. He looked _good_, and judging by the way he held himself, he knew it.

"I'm not in the mood Sebastian," she said after slipping the hundred dollar note in the cash register and grabbing the three bottles of straight vodka off the back shelf along with a clean shot glass for herself.

"Don't tell me you forgot about our date," He said.

Up until that moment she actually _had_ forgot about Sebastian and the date. "I'm sorry Sebastian, I changed my mind. I just want to be left alone." She said.

"But you promised me a date," He pouted.

"I know, but look, I just got fired, and I'm feeling pretty upset and pissed off at the moment. So please, just leave me alone." She begged.

"Ok, look. Why don't we just sit here at the bar and have drinks for our date? Does that sound good to you?" He asked.

"Sebastian, I told you. I don't want you or your stupid date. So just leave. Me. Alone." She said emphasising each word.

"And I told you that I don't take no for an answer," He threatened gripping the top of her arm forcefully.

Clary flinched as his fingers dug into an already existent bruise. "Ow, Sebastian, you're hurting me. Let go," She forced out between clenched teeth.

Sebastian opened his mouth to reply, but another voice bet him to it.

"I think you should let her go."

They both spun around on their bar stools to find Jace standing just behind Clary with his arms crossed, and a pissed-off expression on his face. His whole posture screamed, _'don't test my patience.'_

"Who are you?" Sebastian demanded.

"The new kid in town, and it would not be wise to piss me off or to get on my bad side. And at the moment, you're heading that way." Jace said lowering his arms so that his clenched fists hung at his sides.

Sebastian seeing his moments snorted. "What are you going to do? Punch me? Because dude, I'll kick you're ass."

Clary eyed both boys up. From a glance it was obvious that if both boys were to get into a fist fight, you would presume that Sebastian would win because his muscles stood out more pronounced. But Clary knew better. She strongly suspected that Jace's muscles were concealed behind his clothing and that he didn't flaunt them in the same which Sebastian did.

"Are you sure about that?" Challenged Jace. There was an underlining threat behind his words.

"Positive."

"Just remember you asked for it," warned Jace before his right fist collided with the side of Sebastian's face.

Sebastian flew off his chair and landed on the ground with a heavy thud. Those who were close by had now formed a ring around them watching the fight with entertainment, and Clary found that she was too terrified to move. But also, she didn't want to. She was mesmerised by the way that Jace fought for her.

Sebastian rolled over and jumped to his feet, facing Jace with a furious look on his face.

Clary not wanting anyone to get hurt quickly jumped between them. Clary was terrified, standing between two males who wanted to have a go at each other's necks, and their close proximity to her was enough to make her want to run away, screaming all the way. But she stood her ground. She faced Sebastian first.

"Dates off Sebastian, so just leave." She commanded and the waited for him to swallow his pride and leave huffing and fuming all the way. Clary didn't face Jace until she watched Sebastian exit the pub. When she did turn to look at Jace she found him already looking at her.

His face showed only kindness, and his sincerity. Clary didn't have a choice but to believe him when he stood up for her, knowing he was doing out of kindness, not for a favour as she had become use to with Valentine.

"Thanks Jace," she said appreciatively, as she sat back down in her seat, pouring herself another shot.

"It's alright. Is it ok if I sit?" He asked.

Clary nodded her head in response.

"So that guy? He was your date?" Jace questioned nodding his head towards the door which Sebastian had left through.

"Yeah, but I didn't really want to go on a date with him, but he pretty much gave me no option in the matter," she explained then downed another shot.

"He seems like an asshole," Jace commented not looking at her.

Clary shrugged. "Hard to say, I don't know him. His just in my English class."

"Wait, wait, wait, wait. Sebastian is in our English class?" Jace asked.

Clary remembered how she and Jace shared the same English, maths, art and music class. So she nodded.

"Well, this is going to be fun," Jace smirked.

Clary rolled her eyes and then drank another shot that one going straight to her head and making her slightly light headed.

"Are you planning on drinking all of that?" Jace inquired, pointing to the two and a bit bottles of vodka she had left.

"Yup."

Jace laughed. "Wow, you must be having a really rough night."

Clary laughed without humour. "You have no idea," She said darkly.

"What's wrong?" Jace asked with concern.

Clary looked up thinking for a moment that Jace was just messing with her and pretended to care. But when she saw his face, she saw that he really was just concerned for her.

"I got fired."

Jace hissed. "Ooh, ouch. That must suck."

Clary glared. "Genuinely, people do think it sucks when they lose their job. Especially when they need the money." She said darkly.

"Ah, I get it. You were planning on a bit of retail therapy weren't you?" Jace laughed.

"No, I need to pay the bills that my dad should be paying." She said before she could stop herself.

_Why_ had she just said that? Was she insane? Did she want to be looked down upon and be given fake sympathy from people, aka Jace, who just couldn't care about her predicament?

No. she did not.

Maybe she was drinking too much alcohol too fast so that it was going straight to her head.

"Why don't your mum and dad pay them?" Asked Jace frowning. "Or do you live alone?"

"No, I don't live alone." She said.

"Oh, well, why don't your parents pay the bills?"

"My mum's not there." Clary explained.

"I'm sorry," Jace said quietly bowing his head slightly.

"Oh no, she's not dead. She left my dad and me when I was ten. So really I don't have a mum."

"What about your dad then? Why doesn't he pay the bills?" Jace asked.

"B-Because he doesn't work. I pay the bills because his always drunk." Clarified Clary.

"Wait you pay the bills?" Jace asked.

Slowly Clary nodded as she poured yet another shot.

"That doesn't seem fair," Jace said as Clary drank the shot.

Clary gave a harsh laugh. "Yeah? Well, you'll soon figure out that life isn't fair." She said getting another shot ready.

Jace didn't comment, instead he just watched as she drowned shot after shot down until she was onto the last bottle of alcohol.

"Is that straight vodka?" He asked grabbing one of the empty bottles to have a look at.

Clary giggled, clearly drunk now. "I don't know, and don't care either. All I know is it is making me forget." She said smiling.

* * *

JPOV

"Forget what?" Jace knew there was more that Clary was hiding and he wanted to know what it was.

He felt a little bad for taking advantage of her situation, but he knew that if she was sober she most likely wouldn't be telling him any of this, and he had taken a liking to the girl.

She was unlike any other girl he had ever met. All the other girls were quick to fall into bed with him, but Clary was immune to him and at times seemed almost afraid of him. But why? He hadn't done anything to make her scared of him had he? They had known each other for a day, and he knew he had been a smartass and a jerk, but he hadn't been an asshole had he? He surely hoped not.

"My dad." she said.

"You don't like your dad?" Jace asked watching with growing concern as Clary drank another shot. He had now lost count to how many she had drunk.

Clary laughed incredulously. "No, I don't like him. His a fucking asshole."

"Even worse than me?" Jace teased but on the inside was thinking her words over inside his head.

"You don't seem like an asshole Jace. Just an incredibly annoying smartass." She said.

Jace laughed. "You're not wrong," He said. "I may look like an asshole, but really I'm not. I just make myself out to seem that way."

"Why? I think you're a nice guy Jace," she said seeming distracted and not entirely sure what she was talking about.

"Because if people see the good in you, they'll start to expect good. And I don't want to have to live up to anyone's expectations." He explained quietly.

"Oh yeah? And who would that be?" She asked closing her eyes.

"A girl that I'm trying to impress," He said. For some reason all his cocky and witty remarks just flew out the window.

In Clary's current state she seemed kind of vulnerable and he felt like it was his duty to take care of her. Jace didn't like girls, they liked him. Fell for him. So why was he feeling like he liked this girl and wanted to get to know her after only one day?

He watched as she reached for another round of shots, but he quickly snatched the bottle out of her hands.

"Hey! What gives?" She demanded, her words sounding slurred.

"I think you've had enough for tonight," He chastised gently and gave the bottle back to the girl behind the bar with curly brown hair and brown eyes.

Jace expected the girl to look at him and try to chat him up but instead all of her focus was on Clary beside him.

"Did she drink two and half bottles of vodka by herself that quickly?" she asked disbelievingly.

"Yeah, I think I'll just take her home where she'll be safe," Jace said.

"Not to your house!" The girl yelled glaring at Jace.

Jace's eyes widened when he caught the girls meaning. "Oh, no! No I was going to take her home to her house." Jace explained.

The girl nibbled on her lower lip for a moment before shaking her head. "No, use her phone to call Simon, he'll take care of her."

"I'm here guys and I am fine. I don't need looking after," Clary said standing up from her barstool and started walking off.

Jace took one last look at the girl before chasing after Clary through the crowd. He caught up to her on the dance floor to find her swaying her hips to the beat of the music while running her hands through her hair.

Over the speakers the song _'Burn It Down'_ by Linkin Park was playing loudly and clearly. Jace stood transfixed watching Clary with a sense of awe. He didn't realise until then just how _beautiful_ Clary was. Sure, from the first moment he met Clary, he thought she was pretty. But the way she stood before him with her eyes closed as she moved to the music, he realised that she was stunning.

Jace smiled as he walked over to her and placed his hands on Clary's hips and started to move with her. Jace thought everything was good until Clary jumped and moved away from him the moment he laid his hands on her as if he had shocked her.

"What are you doing?" She asked hoarsely looking at Jace with a wild and terrified look in her eye.

Jace frowned and slowly moved towards her, making sure she could see what he was doing as he got closer to her.

The way she was acting, Jace felt it was important for her to see that he didn't want to hurt her. He didn't know where the frightened look in her eyes had come from and he decided that he didn't like it. Not one little bit. Clary seemed too innocent to have to feel like that.

"I just wanted to dance with you," Jace said holding his hand out to her, deciding that he would let her make the move.

Clary watched Jace for several seconds before saying, "So you don't want to hurt me?"

Jace frowned. "Why would I want to hurt you?" He asked stepping a tiny bit closer.

"Everyone always hurts me. My mother when she left me and my dad-" she broke off choking on her own words.

Jace reached out and carefully took her hand in his. Giving her the chance to pull away if she wanted to. When she didn't Jace continued speaking.

"How did your dad hurt you?"

Clary shook her head. "No, he _hurts_ me," She whimpered.

Jace pulled her in gently towards his chest where he then slowly placed his arms around her tiny frame.

"How does he hurt you?" Jace asked.

"H-He…" Clary broke off while looking away. When she looked back at Jace he could see that her eyes were glassy with unshed tears. "I-I don't want to talk about it," she whispered.

"Are you sure?" Jace pressed.

Clary nodded.

"Ok, well why don't we just dance and have fun?" He asked.

Clary smiled and nodded. "Yeah."

Jace smiled as he twirled Clary away from him and then brought her back. Clary giggled and slid her arms around his neck to support her weight as she stumbled from the alcohol intake she had.

They danced to the song and when the part when Jay-z started rapping, Jace looked down at Clary as she started to sing it.

"_You told me yes, and held me high  
And I believed when you told that lie  
I played soldier, you played king  
Struck me down when I kissed that ring  
You lost that right to hold that crown  
I built you up, but you let me down  
So when you fall, I take my turn  
and fan the flames as your blazes burn._"

Jace smiled and bent down so he could talk in Clary's ear. "You have a beautiful voice."

Clary didn't appear to hear him as she stopped dancing and looked at Jace. "I don't feel so good."

Jace chuckled. "Yup, you drank too much too quickly."

Clary didn't answer as she seemed to grow more and more pale by the second. Jace knew that she was seconds away from throwing up.

"Come on, I'll take you outside," he said. He looped his arm around her waist and directed her outside.

Just as they got outside Clary bent over, vomiting over the ground. Jace rubbed soothing circles on her back as he held her hair back with the other hand.

Clary coughed and spluttered before she wiped a hand across her mouth. "Jace…" she groaned.

"Shh, it's alright, I'm here," he soothed. "Did you drive here?"

Slowly Clary shook her head.

"Do you have your phone?" He asked.

This time Clary nodded.

"Where is it?"

"I-I don't know. My pockets maybe?" Clary groaned as she slid down the brick wall of the alley and sat on the ground.

Jace reached in the front of her left pocket and came up with nothing so he tried the right pocket but found nothing there either.

"It's not in your pockets Clary," he said.

Clary had her eyes closed and when Jace looked at her, he saw that she was asleep. How she could fall asleep in such an uncomfortable position, he would never know. He stood looking down at her for a moment when he saw her phone peeking out slightly of her bra.

Jace groaned as he closed his eyes. "Jesus," he sighed. Normally he would have no problem with this, but this time he was with Clary and he didn't want to come across as a pervert jackass.

He took a deep breath and then slowly got her phone out of her bra. He was relieved when Clary didn't move or wake up.

He flipped open her phone and flicked through her contacts, surprised to find that she only had two in there. Simon and Magnus.

Jace knew neither of these boys but the girl inside had told him to call Simon, so that's who he chose.

Jace put the phone to his ear as he listened to the phone ring and after the third ring the other end picked up.

"Hello? Clary? Are you alright?" Simon asked.

Jace cleared his throat. "Um, hi. This is Jace Lightwood, I'm using Clary's phone." He said.

There was silence for several seconds before the reply came. "Jace? You're the arrogant jerk in Clary's class? And you're new to school?"

Jace smiled despite himself. So, she had been talking about him. "Uh, yeah, that's me. Hey listen. I've got clary here and she passed out drunk and-"

"She's what?!" Simon yelled.

"Drunk."

"Why is she drunk? Why isn't she at home?" He asked quickly seeming panicked.

"Because she sat at the club drinking bottle after bottle of vodka. The girl behind the bar said to ring you and take her to you and that you'd take care of Clary."

"Maia," said Simon.

"Yeah, whatever. So where do you live and I'll bring her to you," Jace said Impatiently.

"Ten Wigg street," Simon said. "It's a block away from the school, behind it."

Jace nodded then realised that Simon couldn't see him. "Alright I'll find it. See you in ten minutes," he said then hung up the phone.

Jace turned around and bent down to scoop Clary into his arms and carried her over to his car packed on the other side of the parking lot. He was glad that he only had one drink; otherwise he wouldn't have been able to drive.

He gently laid Clary down across the back seat and strapped her in with the middle seat seatbelt. He then ran to the driver's side and started off towards the school.

He started driving towards Simon's house but then paused to look back at Clary.

Her eyelids were closed over her gorgeous green eyes and her hair had gone slightly frizzy from the humid air in the pub. The alcohol that she had consumed had made a light flush spread through her cheeks.

'_She's beautiful,'_ Jace thought to himself. He then looked down at her clothes that smelt like alcohol. Knowing that she would be sleeping in them and then be waking up at Simon's in the morning without being able to go home to change he made a sudden decision. He swung the car around and headed the opposite way towards his house. He pulled into the drive and then reached in his pocket to call his adopted sister Isabelle.

Jace had gone to live with the Lightwoods when he was ten years old and had decided to take on their last name permanently when he was sixteen. He was now eighteen and heading for a sporting scholarship. He had come a long way from the depressed, lonely and self-destructive child that he was.

Isabelle was in no simpler put words, beautiful. Men worshipped her, and she had broken many hearts. Almost the same amount as what Jace probably had. Her raven-black hair fell to the middle of her back and her deep blue eyes were the common trait of the Lightwood family that both his brothers Alec, and Max had. Alec was the same age that Jace was, whereas Isabelle was seventeen and Max was only nine.

"Hello?" Chimed his sister's voice from the other end of the phone.

"Hey Iz," he said, using the nickname he had come up with. His ten year old self thought that _Isabelle_ was too long and formal to say, so he simply called her Iz or Izzy.

"Ugh, Jace. I am _not_ coming to get you from the pub. If you are too drunk to drive, that is you're problem," she said.

Jace smiled slightly. "Well, it's lucky that in out the front parked in the driveway isn't it?" He quipped.

There was silence for several seconds. "Then why the hell are you calling me?" She asked.

From where he was sitting in the car he could see Izzy move the blinds away from her bedroom window to look down at him.

"Can you come down here please? I need a favour."

On the other end he could hear Isabelle sigh warily. "Fine, I'll be down there in a minute," she said.

"Bring some clothes that you don't fit into anymore down with you," Jace said quickly before she could leave her bedroom.

On the other end, he could almost see her pause. "What? Why?"

"Can you just do it, and I'll explain when you get down here?" He asked tiredly.

There was a slight pause, and then, "Ok,"

"Thanks Iz," he said genuinely.

He then heard the sound of the call being cut, so he hung up on his own end and then waited for Isabelle to come down.

Two minutes later she came with some clothes folded neatly over her arm.

"Here you go," she said handing them to Jace and then she glanced in the car at the back seat.

"Whoa, who's that?" she asked pointing to Clary.

"Clary, she's passed out from drinking too much, and she'll need a change of clothes to get into for school tomorrow," he explained.

"Is she another one of your whores?" asked Isabelle with a wink.

Jace frowned and made a disgusted face. The idea of Clary being his 'whore' made him feel sick to his stomach. "God, no," he said wrinkling his nose up.

Isabelle raised her hands in a sign of defence. "Sorry. But, wow… she's really pretty," said Isabelle. After a pause she then added; "And she looks innocent."

Jace glared at Isabelle. "She is, so don't taint her." He threatened.

Isabelle returned his glare. "Asshole," he spat.

Jace grinned. "Love you too Iz," he said and then started the car and pulled out the drive.

He then drove down the street and twenty minutes later, after a few wrong turns he arrived out the front of Simon's house.

Jace was happy to see that Simon already stood outside on the porch waiting for him when he arrived. Jace carefully picked Clary up from out of the car and carried her up the steps to Simon's house. He couldn't get over how small and _light_ she was in his arms.

"Hey," he said greeting Simon as he approached the boy.

"Hi," Simon returned but his gaze was on Clary.

"God she is going to be in so much shit," Simon muttered taking Clary off of Jace.

"Hey, we all are when we do this sort of thing right?" Jace joked but stopped laughing when he saw Simon's face. Jace then started to wonder what _sort_ of trouble Clary was going to be in. All of a sudden a wave of protectiveness washed over him and it took all of his control to not take Clary back out of Simon's arms.

"Thanks for bringing her around Jace." Simon said.

"That's alright," he said.

Simon was still standing there looking at Jace as if he was an idiot.

"Oh, that was my queue to leave right?" Jace asked snippily.

Simon just looked at him and nodded.

"Right, well, see you around." He said awkwardly then walked back down the path and to his car. He then paused and then remembered the clothes he had brought for Clary, he got them off the front passengers seat and brought them back up to Simon.

"Here, these are my sisters, but I brought them thinking Clary might want to wear them in the morning for school." He said.

Simon nodded and said thanks, so once again Jace headed back down to his car.

Simon watching him leave and then walked inside the house carrying Clary with him.

The whole ride home, Jace couldn't stop thinking about his little red headed beauty.

**So that was a really long chapter, so do me a favour and review for me? I'll love you forever if you do :)**

**Do you think Jace and Clary's relationship is moving too quick? Because I didn't want them to be at the stage where they were kissing or anything, but I did want to put in a little bit of fluff between the two. **

**And Clary's in trouble! What's going to happen to her?**

**Review and you'll find out my lovelies :) **

**Question of the day:**

**What's your favourite book series besides the Mortal Instruments? Mines probably Vampire Academy :) comment yours in the reviews.**

**Until next time xx**


	4. Chapter 4 - friend in me

Chapter 3 - Friend in me

**Just a quick AN:**** with the song ****Concrete Angel**** I will be pretending that Clary wrote the song, when she didn't really, it belongs to Martina McBride ^.^**

**Playlist:**

Amazing – Vanessa Amorosi **(Scene 1)**

Bad day – Daniel Power **(Scene 2)**

Concrete Angel – Martina McBride **(Scene 2)**

Welcome to my life – Simple Plan **(Scene 3)**

* * *

The first thing Clary was aware of when she woke up was she was lying in a very comfortable bed. The blankets were soft and feathery around her, and the mattress, instead of being hard and lumpy like her own bed, this one was soft and adjusted itself to her body. It worked with her body not against it like her bed did.

Clary groaned as she rolled over looking for the alarm clock that was ringing loudly and annoyingly. Opening her eyes, Clary squinted against the bright light that flooded the room through the open window. She turned off the alarm and then rolled over to lie on her back – then she frowned.

The ceiling that she was looking at was painted a creamy yellow was crack and peel free compared to her plain white and damaged ceiling she was use to waking up to. The frowned disappeared almost immediately as she recognised that she was in fact staring up at her dear friend Simon's ceiling.

But if she was spread out on his bed, where was he?

She groaned once again as she got up and looked at the time. Seven thirty, and school starting in an hour and a half. She had slept longer that she was used to. _'God'_ Clary thought. '_Sporting a hangover while at school and then dealing with dad later is sure to be fun,'_ she thought then froze.

Her dad.

_Oh shit! _

She shot out of bed and found that she was still in her clothes from last night. She groaned realising that she had no other clothes with her to change into to wear to school, and there was no time for her to run home and change, and even if she did, she didn't want to. Her dad was at home and she wasn't ready to deal with him or his wrath yet.

Then the next question that came to mind was, how did she get at Simon's house? The last thing she could remember was sitting at the bar with Jace, after he had just sent Sebastian away. So what the hell had happened after that? She sighed and then walked out the door and down the staircase to find Simon.

She first went into the kitchen, thinking that she might find him eating breakfast. Only to find it empty. She then decided to look in the lounge room. Her bare feet were getting cold against the tiled floor, but then she walked into the hall where her feet found the carpeted floor. The feeling of the carpet between her toes was a feeling she was unfamiliar with, but decided instantly that she liked it. It had a certain homey feel to it that brought her warmth, compared to the bone chilling coldness that she experienced at home.

When she walked into the lounge room, the sight that she saw stopped her in her tracks and brought a smile to her lips.

Simon was asleep on the couch looking unbearably uncomfortable. His glasses laid on the end table beside the couch and his feet dangled off the end. One arm was over the side of the couch and his fingers lightly brushed the carpeted floor below him. Clary was touched that he had given his comfortable bed up for her and in favour taken up the couch.

She smiled as she walked over towards him and then gently, but firmly shook his shoulder.

"Si."

No answer.

This time she shoved hard. "Simon."

This time a groan slithered out of him and he attempted at batting her hand away.

"Come on Simon. You gotta get up," She said slapping his cheek lightly.

"Ugh," Simon groaned and then blinked his eyes open.

Once he had gotten his bearings he fastened his eyes on Clary and like that he was up.

"Clary!"

She held back a giggle. "Good morning sunshine."

Simon swung his legs off the side of the couch and stood up to his full height. He grabbed the tops of her arms and very gently brought her in towards his body. At first she stiffened at the sudden contact, but after a few seconds she relaxed and slipped her arms around his waist.

"How are you feeling?" Simon asked her.

"Like absolute shit," She replied honestly.

Simon gave her a light squeeze before he let her go. "Come on, I'll make you bacon and eggs for breakfast, and then we can go to school. How about that?" he asked.

Clary smiled up at him and nodded. "Sounds great Si," she said.

He smiled back and then looked down her body at what she was wearing. "Why don't you go and take a shower while I cook breakfast, and then you can come down and join me when you're done?" He suggested.

Clary chuckled without humour. "That sounds great, only I don't have a change of clothes Si."

This time, Simon smiled mischievously. He disappeared into the hall for two seconds and then reappeared holding a set of clothes complete with undies socks and a few bras. Clary could feel the blush creeping into her cheeks at the sight of the bras Simon was carrying for her.

"Where did you get them?" she asked curiously. Looking at the clothes, they looked too nice to belong to her, so she wondered where Simon had gotten them. She could swear she even caught sight of a billabong tag on one of the tops.

"When Jace dropped you off last night, he also dropped off some of his sisters clothes, thinking that you might want to wear them to school, rather than clothes that smell like alcohol and cigarette smoke." He answered.

Clary could feel her mouth hanging open. "Jace brought me here?" She asked in a near whisper.

Simon nodded slowly, calculating her reaction towards Jace. "Yeah, he called me off your phone, saying that you were drunk, and that he didn't want to take you home to your house… so he brought you here instead."

Clary flushed. What had she said to make him decide that she was better off at Simon's house rather than her own? It was true of course, she _was_ better off here and away from her father, but what had she told him that deemed her house unsafe to him? The thought made her feel queasy. She hoped against hoped that she hadn't told him about her father's abuse. She didn't know what she would do if she had. Clary had only just met the boy, and yet, she felt an undeniable attraction towards him, and she highly suspected she wasn't the first to fall into his web.

"Oh…" was all she said.

"Clary…" Simon begun hesitantly. "Y-You didn't tell him about your dad, last night… did you?"

Clary shook her head. "No… at least I don't think so…" She said tentatively.

"Are you certain?" Simon pressed. "Because you know what you're dad said he'd do if he found out you told someone Clary."

Clary bit her lip as she tried to show no fear. "I-I can't be certain, Si. I can't remember last night, let alone what I said!"

"Well you need to be!" Simon yelled.

Clary froze, drawing her hands in towards her. Simon had never raised his voice to her. She knew he was frustrated, but he was always careful to keep his feelings under control for her sake. He knew that she would be afraid of him if he yelled. Because he knew that he would sound like her father when he beat her. And that was the last thing he wanted. For her to be afraid of him.

As he looked at Clary now, seeing her trembling from fear, he knew he had gone too far. Here he was supposed to be protecting her, and all he was doing was scaring the poor thing.

Simon reached out for her, but she shrunk away from him in fear, though he knew she would never admit it.

"I'm sorry Clary," He whispered regretfully.

Clary breathed in deeply through her nose. Inhale… exhale…. She just had to focus on that. She knew she was being ridiculous and that Simon would never hurt her. Slowly she shook her head.

"No, Si, I'm sorry. I shouldn't be afraid. It's wrong to be afraid. All it does is shows how weak I am." She said looking down at the ground.

Simon frowned. The poor girl… the things her father was doing to her. Telling her and then beating it into her until she believed it was saddening. It was wrong. No father should be treating their daughter in such a way. They should be loving them and cherishing them. Not making a slave or a punching bag out of them.

"It's alright, Clare-bear. You don't need to be sorry. Why don't you just go and have your shower? Breakfast will be ready for when you come back down," he said, handing her the clothes.

She gave a small, forced smile, while she took the clothes off him. "Sure. Sounds great."

Simon nodded to her as she walked past him and made her way to the bathroom.

As she stood under the showers head with the hot water beating down over her, it cleared her head and relieved her aching and sore muscles. She thought Simon's words over and over inside of her head. She knew he was right. She couldn't tell Jace about her dad, but at the same time she wanted him to find out, or at least know about her dad. Because then… in some stupid, dreamed up dream, she thought that maybe… just maybe… he might save her, and get her out of her life that she called a nightmare.

Clary sighed, rubbing her hands over her face then turned off the water. She stepped out of the shower and found a towel hanging up nearby. She used that to wrap around her body and then used a second towel to wrap around to her head as she made her way back into Simon's bedroom.

She had laid the outfits down on the bed and now, she looked at each one in turn. Jace's sister had given her three outfits to choose from. One of them was not her taste at all. Short mini skirt, revealing yet tight red tank top and fishnet stockings to match. At the bottom sat knee high boots that had at least, a four inch heel on them. How anyone could wear that kind of outfit to school, she'll never know.

In the end, Clary had decided to wear the second outfit that was laid out for her. Black skinny jeans, a brown cashmere singlet and a plain white cardigan that fell to her mid thighs. It had to be the fanciest thing she had ever worn. All the clothes were designer brands, and the jeans looked like they costed sixty dollars or more alone. To complete the outfit, Clary wore her own converse shoes that she had worn to work by accident, but was now grateful for doing so.

She ran Simon's brush that she found on the bathroom counter hastily through her hair before she set it down and took a deep breath while looking at herself in the mirror. She had never liked her appearance, especially with all the bruises, cuts and scars all across her body. She believed it just added to her imperfection. Unlike Jace. He was so perfect, in looks, personality and in getting on her nerves. She wondered if perhaps she was falling for him. After all, he had taken care of her in her most vulnerable state, and the way he stood up for her against Sebastian. There was just something undeniably drawing them closer together.

Clary left the bedroom and made her way back into the kitchen where she was greeted from the delicious smell of bacon. She rounded the corner to see the funniest sight she had ever seen.

Simon was standing at the stove with mittens on his hands and an apron tied around his waist.

Clary covered her mouth with her hand to stop the laughter coming out of her, but she couldn't help the small giggle that came out.

At the sound of her laughter Simon turned and grinned when he caught sight of her, but then he seemed to see what she was wearing and his expression went slack. All the emotion was wiped off his face and he looked at her with a sort of awe and affectionate expression. Clary beginning to feel uncomfortable under his gaze spoke.

"Is breakfast ready Jamie Oliver?" She teased.

Simon visibly shook himself, and then smirked at her. "Yes it is Madame."

Clary smiled and went over to take a seat at the table where Simon then served her up a good load of bacon with two eggs. Clary looked at her plate and then looked at Simon.

"Is some of this yours?" She asked confused. The amount of food that was on her plate was the amount of food she ate in one week.

"No, mine is over here," he gestured to the plate over on the bench which he brought over to the table with himself as he sat to join Clary.

"Jesus Si, how much do you think I eat?" Clary demanded poking at a piece of bacon.

"Uh, not enough? I've seen what you eat at lunchtimes Clary, and I doubt you ever eat enough at home, and that's probably why you're so skinny. So you're not leaving the table until you've eaten all of it, understood?" He commanded as he dug into his own meal.

"But we can't be late for school!" Clary protested.

"Then you better eat quickly, shouldn't you?" He teased.

Clary sighed but gulped down her breakfast nether the less. It was delicious too. The best thing she has eaten in years.

After they had eaten Simon cleared their plates, and Clary helped by drying them, much to Simon's objection. Clary then grabbed her bag and then the two of them were driving to school with Clary in shot gun. The silence in the car was awkward, and Clary could tell that there was something that Simon had on his chest that he wanted to get off by telling her. But he remained silent, and the silence was deafening in Clary's ears.

They pulled into the car park at school, and Clary got out, closing the door behind her with a gentle thud.

Clary started to walk in the direction of the school, but Simon had called her back.

"Clary."

"Yeah?" She asked coming around to where Simon was still standing next to his car door.

Simon looked at her over the rim of his glasses. The way he was looking at her sent shivers down her spine in an unpleasant way. She couldn't describe the feeling that had just washed over her, but it was one that she didn't like.

"I need to tell you something. Something I have been meaning to tell you for a while now," He said stepping around her so that she was now leaning against the car and Simon stood in front of her.

"What is it?" she asked nervously.

"Well, it's just I don't like you getting involved with anyone Clare-bear. Especially Jace Lightwood. He looks like a nice guy, but I bet he just uses woman as toys for his own convenience."

"I'm not getting involved with anyone, and Jace is a good guy Simon, he just comes off as an asshole. But he looked after me last night, and that has to count for something." She said suddenly feeling like she had to defend Jace.

"That's what I'm afraid of Clary. I can tell you like Jace – don't try to deny it – and I just don't want you to get hurt. You need someone who you can count on being there for you." Simon said, looking over his shoulder to where Jace was standing under a large oak tree with two other teenagers, both with black hair.

Clary could see that Jace was looking at her, and that he wanted to come over to her, but held back because he could see that Clary and Simon appeared to be having a private conversation.

"I won't be getting hurt Simon, I just want to get to know him. There's just something about him that makes me _want_ to get to know him Si, so please, just let me." She almost begged of Simon.

Simon narrowed his gaze and crossed his arms over his chest. "I can't Clary, I don't know that he will be there for you."

"I think he will, but that doesn't matter because I will always have you and Magnus." Clary said looking back at Jace over Simon's shoulder. Clary saw Jace give her a smile and a small wave. She smiled back.

"That's right Clary. I _will_ always be here for you, and you already know me," Simon pressed, bringing Clary's attention back to him.

"Look Si, I appreciate the concern, but why are we even talking about this? What has this got to do with Jace?" She asked tiredly.

"It has everything to do with Jace! I can see that you have chosen him already, even if you can't see it yourself yet, and I want you to choose me, not him." Simon said.

That caught Clary's attention. "What are you getting at Si?"

Simon huffed and dropped his arms from his chest, looking down at the ground. "Jesus Christ," he muttered. "I may as well just tell her. She doesn't see it."

He was speaking so low that Clary was having trouble understanding him, but she caught a few words.

"Tell me what Simon?" She asked rather nervously.

Simon looked up at her, his eyes raking over her face, taking in everything about her before he met her eyes once more. "I love you Clary."

Clary's breath left her lungs in one big huff. He _loved_ her? How could he love her? They had been friends for years. Friends! She couldn't have Simon turning on her now like this, it may ruin their friendship and then Clary would have no one. She may as well just let her father kill her if she ever lost Simon and Magnus. They were all that gave her the strength to fight every day. But then Clary realised that she was wrong. There was Jace. Jace – the ray of sunshine that had shone down on her darkened world. He had given her hope. Not just to security and the sympathy that she got from Simon and Magnus, but he gave her the will and the strength the fight her dad. Sure they had known each other for only three days, but the connection that she felt to him was there.

Clary looked back up at Simon from where she had been looking at Jace – who was giving her confused looks. "Please tell me that you love me as a friend. Not as in what I think you mean." She begged.

"No Clary, I love you like a man loves a woman. I have been in love with you for three years." Simon said stepping closer to her and resting his hand on the car beside her, next to her head. He leaned down and Clary knew what he was going to do – and she didn't want that. Not at all. Not from Simon.

"Simon – please don't-" she started but was cut off by Simon's lips on hers.

He kissed her with a kind of fiery passion, like he was a man who had been suffocating for all of his life. Clary stood frozen from the sudden intrusion and terror that she felt on the inside. Simon knew how she felt about the opposite sex being so close to her. He knew how terrified of guys she was and what they could do to her. For a moment she did nothing. She just stood there being to shell-shocked to do anything, but then the situation and what was going on came to her.

Simon's hands were clutching her waist and hips possessively and the way he kissed her had a bruising effect on her lips. Clary groaned from discomfort and repulsion. She thought of Simon as a brother – so to be kissing him was just beyond weird for her. Simon however took her groan the wrong way and thought that he was turning her on – when in fact he was doing the exact opposite. He was scaring her. Simon's hand slipped into her hair and the other wrapped around her waist, holding her tightly against him. That was when Clary couldn't take it anymore.

She put her arms between Simon and her, and with her hands and all the strength she could muster, she pushed against his chest.

"Simon, stop," she grunted against his lips from the force of trying to push back his weight. With the bruises on her arms and her fractured wrist, it was quite painful to do so.

He pulled back slightly, but not enough to ease her claustrophobic feeling. "What's wrong?" He asked seeming in a daze.

"What's wrong? _What's wrong?! _Are you serious?" She yelled. She realised that she was attracting the attention of people around her, and she wouldn't put it past anyone that Jace had seen. She felt her stomach twisting painfully at the thought of Jace seeing her kissing someone else.

"Clary… I have wanted to kiss you since I met you!" Simon yelled back.

Clary could feel that her eyes were wide and her hands were shaking at her sides.

"I didn't want to kiss you! I don't like you, not in _that_ way! You should know what getting that close to me does!" Clary screeched. She could now feel the tears that were gathering behind her eyes, but she stubbornly blinked them back – refusing to let them fall.

Simon stood there breathing heavily. "You realise Clary that I just can't go back to being your friend after kissing you like _that_." He said.

Now was when the tears started to pool over her cheeks. "How can you say that Simon?" Clary breathed disbelievingly. "I need you."

"And I need you as my girlfriend Clary, not my friend." Simon said dully.

Clary blinked in astonishment. "Are you really discarding me because I won't be your girlfriend?" Clary whispered in a painful voice.

Simon just stood there with his arms crossed, not saying anything.

"Fine, be that way you jerk!" she yelled and then ran in the direction of the school heading for the music room.

As Clary ran, she could hear someone calling out her name behind her, and running after her. Thinking it was Simon, she blinked the tears out of her eyes and ran faster – not looking back as she ran.

* * *

Clary sat down at the bench in front of her favourite instrument – the piano. She rested her head on her arms over the closed lid of the piano and finally let herself weep. How could Simon say those things to her and then above all kiss her when he knew that she wouldn't like it? Just to sooth his own selfish desires.

Clary sighed and sat up, running her hands over her face to wipe away the tears still situated on her cheeks. She flipped the lid on the piano so that the keys of the piano were now staring up at her, daring for her to play them and get the release that she has been wanting for the last couple of days. Music was her only way out, and drawing. Some people talked to friends or to councillors, but Clary had no one to talk to – especially now. She had Magnus, but she had no idea where he was.

Slowly Clary ran her fingers over the keys, feeling their hard coolness inviting her in. soon enough a slow melody was surrounding the room, and Clary's voice went along with the music, singing the lyrics.

_Where is the moment we needed the most?  
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost  
They tell me your blue skies fade to grey  
They tell me your passions gone away  
And I don't need no carryin' on_

_You stand in the line just to hit a new low  
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go  
They tell me your life's been way off line  
You're falling to pieces every time  
And I don't need no carryin' on_

'_Cause you had a bad day, you're taking one down  
You sing a sad song just to turn it around  
You say you don't know, you tell me don't lie  
You work on a smile and you go for a ride_

_You had a bad day, the camera don't lie  
You're coming back down and you really don't mind  
You had a bad day  
You had a bad day_

As clary played, she was oblivious to the fact that she had been followed to the music room, and didn't see or hear the person who slipped in the room, slowly closing and locking the door behind them.

_Well you need a blue sky holiday  
The point is they laugh at what you say  
And I don't need no carryin' on_

_You had a bad day, you're taking one down  
You sing a sad song just to turn it around  
You say you don't know, you tell me don't lie  
You work on a smile and you go for a ride  
You had a bad day, the camera don't lie  
You're coming back down and you really don't mind  
You had a bad day  
Mmm, on a holiday_

_Sometimes the system goes on the blink  
And the whole thing it turns out wrong  
You might not make it back and you know  
That you could be well oh that strong  
And I'm not wrong_

_So where was the passion when you need it the most?  
Oh you and I  
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost_

'Cause you had a bad day, you're taking one down  
You sing a sad song just to turn it around  
You say you don't know, you tell me don't lie  
You work on a smile and you go for a ride  
You had a bad day, you see what you're like  
And how does it feel a one more time?  
You had a bad day  
You had a bad day

_Had a bad day  
Had a bad day  
Had a bad day_

Clary slowed down the melody to the song and then came to a stop, but still kept her hands on the keys. She closed her eyes, breathing deeply through her nose, she badly wanted to cry, no _needed_ to cry – but knew that it was pointless. Crying gets you nowhere.

Clary sniffed and wiped her nose on the back of her arm sleeve when suddenly she heard the sound of clapping, and approaching footsteps behind her.

She whirled around and saw Jace standing there, and just the sight of him made her breath get caught in her throat.

"That was beautiful Clary, I mean what I said last night – you have a beautiful voice," He said coming to sit beside her on the stool.

"What are you doing here Jace?" She asked, bewildered to see him there beside her.

Jace frowned. "I ran after you after watching the scene in the parking lot."

Clary swallowed and looked at the ground. "I don't want to talk about that," She said darkly.

"Are you sure…? Because I know you guys were friends," Jace hedged.

"Yes I'm sure! What do you want me to say? I pushed my best friend away because he kissed me when I didn't want him to?" Clary demanded angrily.

"You're talking about it right now," Jace commented smugly, smiling and crossing his arms over his chest.

Clary huffed and turned on the stool so she had her back to him. "I was going to talk about it you jerk," she snapped.

Suddenly Clary felt him wrap his hand around the top of her arms, and she jolted in surprise – almost falling off the seat.

"Whoa, easy there tiger," Jace half joked but frowned at her actions.

"Please don't touch me," Clary begged, blinking away the few tears that came to her eyes.

Jace's frown deepened and he reached up to wipe the tears away, but Clary flinched back.

"God Clary, why are you so… jumpy?" He asked.

"I-I don't like people touching me," Clary said still looking down at the piano.

"Why is that? Is that why you pulled away from Simon?" He questioned.

Clary nodded. "Yes, I pulled away from Simon because of that, and also I just don't like him in that particular way," She explained.

"You didn't answer my first question," Pointed out Jace.

"What?"

"Why don't you like people touching you?" He repeated.

"B-Because, I think they're going to hurt me," Clary admitted.

_Why_ was she telling these things? Clary screamed at herself.

"You thought I was going to hurt you?" Jace asked disbelievingly.

Slowly Clary nodded, too afraid to answer.

"I could never hurt you Clary, so don't ever think that," He told her sincerely, and when Clary looked in his eyes she could tell he was being honest.

She just nodded not replying.

"So, _why_ do you think that people will hurt you?" Jace asked but she could see that he had a suspicion in mind.

"B-Because I've been hurt before," She whispered unable to look him in the eyes.

"Like emotionally…?" He asked.

Clary shook her head. "No, like physically." She said.

Beside her she could see Jace's hands clench into fists. "Deliberately?" He asked with anger in his voice.

"Yeah…" She croaked.

Clary could hear Jace clenching his jaw and when she looked up at him she could see the fury that he was feeling deep inside. Clary bit her lip and then made a decision she thought she'd never do.

"C-Can I show you something?" Clary asked nervously.

Jace's eyes flew to hers and slowly he nodded. "What is it?" he asked.

"It's a song I wrote about a year ago," She explained before turning back to the piano keys in front of her.

Slowly, a melody filled the room again and she could feel Jace's eyes watching her carefully.

Just before she started to sing, Clary slipped her eyes closed so that she wouldn't be able to see Jace's reaction to the song.

**(AN: PLEASE READ THE LYRICS, OTHERWISE THE SCENE AND JACE'S REACTION MAY NOT MAKE SENSE; AND WELL, THE LYRICS ARE BEAUTIFUL)**

_She walks to school with the lunch she packed  
Nobody knows what she's holding back  
Wearing the same dress she wore yesterday  
She hides the bruises with linen and lace  
Oh oh  
The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask  
It's hard to see the pain behind the mask  
Bearing the burden of a sacred storm  
Sometimes she wishes she was never born_

_(Chorus)_

_Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams, give her wings  
And she flies to a place  
Where she's loved  
Concrete angel_

_Somebody cries in the middle of the night  
The neighbours hear but they turn out the light  
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate  
When morning comes it will be too late_

_(Chorus)_

_Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place  
Where she's loved  
Concrete angel_

_A statue stands in a shaded place  
An angel girl with an upturned face  
A name is written on a polished rock  
A broken heart that the world forgot_

_(Chorus)_

_Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place  
Where she's loved  
Concrete angel_

As Clary finished the song she kept her eyes closed still breathing heavily. She could feel the tears sliding down her cheeks from the emotions that the song brought out of her. Not even Simon or Magnus had heard the song before. Jace was the only one. She was still looking down at the piano, unable to bring herself to look at Jace – when suddenly he was doing it for her.

He gently gripped her chin in his hold and turned her face to look at him. There were several expressions running across his face just then that it was hard to pin point just one. Pain, anger, regret, confusion, protection and love. Wait… love? Surely she was imagining that one. Why would someone like him love someone like her?

Just then, he wasn't the Jace that she knew. The rude, arrogant, obnoxious Jace was gone. In his place was a kind, caring and sympathetic Jace that she wasn't use to and didn't know how to be around. She knew that her tough-girl walls were down, showing him the sad, broken and terrified girl that was behind them. She didn't know how he was going to react, and that scared her.

"Clary…" Jace said his voice sounding husky with emotion. He stopped to swallow thickly before continuing. "You wrote that?"

Slowly she nodded.

"Based on what is happening in your life?" He pressed.

Again, she nodded.

The hand that he had under her chin tightened slightly and she winced when his fingers dug into a bruise on her left jaw.

"Does that mean what I think it means?" He asked his tone slightly angry now.

This time, Clary looked up to meet his gaze. "That my father abuses me? Then yeah, it does."

She tried to say it casually, but when she did, her voice caught in her throat and a few more tears fell down her cheeks.

Jace's hand under her chin disappeared only to wrap both of his arms around her and pull her in towards his chest.

Clary stiffened and Jace stilled around her. Slowly he pulled back to look at her but still kept his arms around her.

"Are you alright?" He asked worriedly. Had he done something to hurt her? Was she not comfortable with him touching her? Jace strongly suspected that it was a bit of both.

"Yeah," Clary said nodding. "Just – give me a second to – to get used to it," She told him in a whisper and he nodded.

He rubbed her back soothingly as Clary buried her head into Jace's shoulder, breathing in the mere essence of him.

After a few minutes Clary pulled back to look at him with tears running down her cheeks still.

"Jace… I need a friend. Simon… well you saw and heard what Simon said earlier… so… will you be my friend, Jace?" She asked slowly and quietly not looking into his eyes. She wouldn't be able to cope with life if he said no.

For a minute, Jace got this funny look on his face before he smiled and brought her face up so she was looking at him.

"Of course I'll be your friend."

Clary smiled and stood up when the bell rang for second period outside. Clary hadn't realised until then that she had missed first period of maths which she was glad about.

"We've got English now don't we?" Jace asked standing with her.

Clary smiled and nodded as she went to open the door to the music room before Jace's hand snaked out to stop her.

"Jace…?" She asked cautiously.

"I just want to say I'm sorry, Clary."

Clary frowned. "What for?"

"When we first met, I was such a jackass to you, and you didn't deserve that. So I'm sorry." He said.

Clary smiled and reached out to hug him slowly. "It's ok Jace, I forgive you. I wasn't exactly nice to you either," she said.

Jace laughed. "Yes, well, you did leave me kind of stunned. I have never had a girl stand up to me before. They were all quick to fall at my feet and beg me to take them home," he joked.

Clary scowled. "Ugh, Jace, I do not want to know about your little skanks that you take home." she said.

She also vowed then that she wouldn't become one of them.

Jace chuckled as he took her hand and led her out the door. "You're better than them Clary. Don't lower yourself to that level-" he began but stopped when he felt Clary tear her hand out of his and looked at him with wild and terrified eyes.

"Clary – what..?" he asked stepping closer to her.

"Please don't hurt me," She whimpered.

Jace froze. "I could never hurt you Clary."

"But you took my hand-"

Jace frowned. So that is what this was about? She thought he was going to hurt her because he took her hand?

"That's what friends do when they lead each other out of a room and to class. It's like a way of saying 'I'll always be here for you'" he explained.

Clary flushed red and looked embarrassed. "Oh, sorry." She said grabbing his hand slowly once again.

As they were walking out the classroom and towards Clary's locker he decided to ask her.

"Clary, why did you freak out so bad back there?" He asked.

Clary pretended to play dumb. "What?"

"Why did you freak out when I grabbed your hand?" He had to know.

Clary sighed defeated. "Well the first time that my dad – forced me to do… things – he took my hand and led me to my room where he then said we would 'play'. But I was fourteen, so I knew what he was going to do, and so I fought him. Because I fought him, after he was finished… his 'fun time' I received a really bad beating for not doing as I was told." She explained.

Jace's hands were balled up into fists – the only indication that he was furious. "Does your dad still have his… 'Fun times' now?"

Clary looked away. "Sometimes but not as often as what it was. At times it was every night. Now it's just when he feels like it, or he can't get his slut to come home with him."

Jace sighed angrily and looked around them, seeing everyone hurrying around them to get on time to class. "Well, let's go, and I'll introduce you to my siblings at lunch, okay?" He asked kindly.

Clary nodded and grabbed her books before heading to class with Jace.

Class flew past really fast with Jace telling her jokes or mucking around to make her laugh and smile like the biggest goofball ever. Eventually after a long lesson of taking board notes, the bell had rung and it was lunch time.

Clary and Jace left class together which brought a lot of looks towards them. The quiet girl with the most popular guy in school – yeah, funny sight. Clary knew that there would be rumours started about her and Jace, but in that moment she just couldn't care because she suddenly just caught sight of Magnus down the hall so she called out to him.

"Magnus!"

He turned his sparkly head around and grinned when he saw Clary waving at him. He turned around and headed for them instead of going out the door that leads to the bleachers.

"Hey kiddo, I was just looking for you," He stated as he approached them and gave Clary a careful hug.

"Yeah, I'm glad I found you because I wanted to say that I'm sitting with Jace for lunch. Is that ok?" She asked chewing on her bottom lip.

Magnus rolled his eyes. If she wasn't asking permission to do something she wanted, she was apologising for something that wasn't her fault.

"You don't need to ask me Clare-bear, you can do what you want. But can I join you?" He asked directing the last bit towards Jace.

Jace smiled and shrugged his shoulders. "Why not?"

They started walking to the cafeteria to buy their lunch, it was then that Clary realised that she didn't have money. She swallowed a groan. As they joined the queue they began talking.

"So you're the jackass that Clary was telling us about yesterday?" Magnus asked of Jace.

Clary flamed red. "Magnus!" She hissed.

Magnus just gave her an innocent smile while Jace chuckled. "Yeah that'd be me." He said.

"So what changed?" He asked Clary.

"Uh, well… we _talked_ and Jace… learnt a few things about me…" She mumbled towards the ground.

Beside her, Magnus went stiff. "You mean he _knows_?!" He demanded.

Clary just went red and refused to answer. Magnus took that as a yes.

"You know what you're father said Clary…" He whispered.

The whole time Jace was just standing there watching the two of them between curious narrowed eyes, criticizing everything.

"I know Magnus! It's not like my father lets me forget!" She yelled making a few heads turn towards them.

Magnus shhhed her by rubbing his hands up and down to sooth her. "I'm sorry Clare-bear." He whispered. "I'm just worried about you." he said.

Clary sighed. "I know Mags. Hey – what were you doing when I saw you? Why weren't you with Simon?" She asked wincing slightly when she said Simon's name.

"Ah, well you see – after I heard what Simon had done, I was mad at him. So I went to find him to have a little… _talk_ with him… and then I just have been avoiding him since then because I'm mad at him." He explained.

"What do you me 'talk' Magnus?" Clary asked carefully.

"Well let's just say that Simon had to go home sick for the day," He said showing her and Jace his bloodied knuckles.

"Nice!" Jace exclaimed while Clary shouted his name in despair.

"What did you do to him?" Clary asked.

"I gave him a broken nose," Magnus said proudly while Jace chortled at her side.

Clary didn't say anything as they were next to grab their food. She stood to the side as Jace and Magnus got what they wanted and payed for it. They were just about to leave the line when Jace realised that Clary hadn't grabbed anything to eat.

"Where's your food Clary?" He asked.

Clary shrugged. "I don't have money and I didn't bring lunch," She explained.

Jace shook his head and turned back. He ordered her a cheeseburger, donut and drink and then gave the lady the money for her lunch.

Jace handed it to Clary while she blushed. "Thanks," She said gingerly.

Jace smiled widely. "Your most welcome," He said and led them over to his table where two people already sat.

Clary instantly recognised them as the two teenagers that drove past her with Jace on the first day of school. One was a girl. She had very long black hair that reached down to her waist and was as straight as a piece of paper. Her blue eyes flickered up when she saw Clary, Jace and Magnus approaching. Her clothing didn't let down her stunning looks either. Black skinny jeans, a sequined t-shirt and leather Jacket with killer heeled boots on her feet.

The second was a boy, who looked very much like his sister with his black hair and blue eyes. Except with his clothing they were carelessly chosen compared to his sisters. He had on simple grey trackie pants with a brown sweater with holes everywhere in it. His hair looked tousled as if he had just rolled out of bed. His eyes were already on the sparkly boy at Clary's side.

"Hey guys," Jace greeted as he sat next to the black headed boy and she slipped on the seat next to him so she was next to the girl with the long black hair. Magnus sat opposite Clary between the two Lightwood siblings.

"Hey Jace," said the siblings in unison.

"Clary, this is my sister Isabelle, and this is my brother Alec," he said referring to each of them in turn.

They both muttered a hello as Jace went on with the introductions.

"Guys, this is Clary, and her friend Magnus," He said pointing to each of them.

Alec looked towards Magnus while Isabelle looked at Clary beside her.

"So, my clothes fit you well?" She asked.

Clary flushed red. "Um, yes they do. Thank you Isabelle," She mumbled looking at the table.

"Why did you wear the white cardigan for though? I thought that the red tank top I put in the mix would have looked a lot better on you," She said.

Again Clary blushed. "Well this one just caught my attention more," She lied.

"But still you could have-" Isabelle began before Jace cut across her.

"She wanted to wear that one Isabelle. Just leave it." he ordered and everyone at the table fell silent.

Isabelle stared at Jace with wide, shocked eyes where as everyone else looked at him in surprise. Clary smiled slightly at the thought of Jace defending her. When Jace caught her smile and realised what she was thinking he gave her a small smile back.

* * *

JPOV

Lunch passed fairly quickly with quiet conversations circling around the table and the last two periods flew past as well. Before Jace knew it, it was the end of the day and time to go home.

He was just starting to get into his car when he saw Clary walking out of the school gates. He turned to Isabelle and Alec who were bickering over whose go it was to ride shot gun when he barked out an order at the two of them.

"Hurry up and get in the car!" He yelled.

Alec and Isabelle snapped to attention and quickly Alec slipping in the shot gun seat while Isabelle glared at him and slide into the back seat. Jace gunned the engine of the car and sped out of the parking lot only to pull up along the curve where the tiny little red-headed beauty was walking.

He jumped out of the car as Clary looked up startled and pulled out the buds to her iPod from her ears.

"Jace? What are you doing?" She asked.

"I could ask you the same thing," He responded. "Are you really going to walk all the way home?" He asked.

Clary nodded. "Yeah, I always walk to school, and now that I don't have a job to go to I just have to walk home now I guess." She said.

Jace shook his head in disbelief. "You _guess_? But that's got to be at least thirty kilometres," He said.

Clary shrugged. "Yeah, give or take."

Jace just stared at her in shock before he shook his head. "No, don't be silly. Get in the car, I'm giving you a lift home." he stated as he grabbed her hand and led her to the car.

"No Jace!" She yelled. And he looked back at her. "I'm in trouble as it is when I get home, so I want to drag it out as long as possible."

Jace froze. "What sort of trouble?" He asked carefully.

"You know what trouble Jace," She said her voice wavering slightly with fear.

He turned around to face her and lightly gripped her face between his hands. She flinched.

"You're strong Clary, I know that you will get through tonight just like every other one, and will come out stronger than before. I believe in you Clary. And if I ever come across that mother fucker in public, I am going to bash the shit out of him and I don't think that anyone could hold me back from killing him if I wanted to," he said.

Clary smiled slightly but it was a sad smile. "Promise me that you'll never kill him Jace. Because even after everything – at the end of the day he is still my father, you know?" she asked.

Jace grimaced. He knew what she meant but that didn't mean that he had to like it. After all he did kill his own birth father…

But this is Clary, his new _friend_ and it was her wish not his, and he respected that. "I promise Clary."

She smiled, clearly relieved. "Thanks Jace."

"But, only if you get in the car and I give you a lift home. I can't let you walk all that way when I am going in the same direction," he said.

She groaned. "Jace…"

He shook his head. He wasn't hearing it. "Get in the car."

He turned and got back in the car not looking back to see if Clary was getting in because he just _knew_ that she would.

"Hey Clare," Isabelle greeted as Clary got in the car.

"It's Clary," she mumbled.

"I know silly, I've got my nickname for you. Clare," Isabelle explained and Clary rolled her eyes as an answer.

The car fell into comfortable silence as Jace drove. Every now and then he would look at Clary in the rear view mirror. He could see her looking out the window and chewing on her bottom lip as she fiddled with her hands. All signs that she was nervous and scared of what awaited for her at home.

As he pulled up at her house Clary hurriedly jumped out the car but paused to lean down to look at Jace through his window so he wound it down so she could talk to him.

"Thanks for the ride Jace," She said.

He smiled. "It's fine Clary," he said and suddenly a thought struck him so he reached in his bag to pull out a piece of paper and a pen. On the paper he scribbled down his phone number. He handed to Clary who took it as if it was the most precious object she owned. When she realised what it was she grinned at him.

"Thanks Jace," she said again.

He laughed and shook his head. "It's fine Clary. I'm always available and you can reach me any time of the day or the night," he said.

In the back Isabelle scoffed in disgust but only he and Clary knew that he didn't mean it the way it sounded.

Clary realised what he really meant and grinned wider. "Thanks Jace."

"That's ok," he said then watched as she walked up the dirty path to her house. Only Jace noticed the slight hesitation in her step before she entered her house and closed the front door behind her.

Jace pulled back onto the road only to stop a few short metres up the road and jumped out the car.

"Dude, what the hell?" Alec asked turned to look at Jace.

"I'll be back in a minute. Just wait here ok?" He instructed and then ran back to Clary's house.

When he got there, he crouched down and hid behind the hedge outside the lounge room window and peered in.

Inside he could see Clary was cowered against the far wall in the lounge room with her father towering over her. Even from his place outside he could hear their voices.

"_What do you mean this is all the money you have?!_" thundered her father.

"_Well, I got fired, and I need the two hundred to pay the bills with…_" Clary answered her voice shaking with nerves.

"_So I only have fifty dollars to buy alcohol with?_" He father yelled in complete anger.

Clary winced. "_Well, I kind of drank last night…"_

Jace felt like slapping his hand to his forehead then with her stupidity.

"_So you were out in the town being a little slut and drinking away my money and then stayed at one of your boyfriends houses huh?_" Demanded her father.

Clary didn't appear to answer so her father just took that as a yes as he sent a punch to her ribs. Clary groaned and doubled over in pain grasping her side as she fell to the floor.

"_At least I'll always have something that you're boyfriends will never have,_" sneered her father as he got down and in her face. "_Do you know what that is dear daughter of mine?_" he asked as he grabbed the scruff of her collar and lifted her up off the ground of that her feet weren't touching the floor. Slowly and agonisingly Clary shook her head.

"_You're virginity,_" he laughed and then dropped her to the floor where she then crumbled to a heap and received a swift kick in the side from her father.

Jace felt the anger stir inside him as he saw Clary father beginning to take off Isabelle's white cardigan and tear the brown cashmere shirt she was wearing to expose her in her bra.

Jace had started to stand up with his hand balled up into fists. He was ready to smash down the front door, knock out her father – possibly kill him – and then save Clary and carry her to safety.

Or well that was until she saw him.

Her face only displayed the shock of seeing him there outside of her house.

She then realised what she was seeing. Her half naked body, her father beating her, and getting ready to rape her.

Tears came to Clary's eyes and Jace wanted nothing more than to wipe them away and comfort her and hold her in his arms the way she deserved. That was until he saw her lips moving to form words to him.

"_Go._"

At first Jace couldn't comprehend what she was saying, but then it sunk in and he shook his head furiously.

"_No! I'm going to save you!_" he mouthed back.

"_You already have, but if he sees you, he'll kill me,_" she responded.

At that Jace froze. He couldn't live in a world without the little red-head at his side. The answer was easy of course. Yes, he could. He has for eighteen years of his life. But that was before she was his friend and she was starting to mean something very important to him and he always stands by those he cares for and does anything he can to protect them.

By now her father had been oblivious to their silent conversation and had succeeded in getting all of Clary's clothes off.

Jace flinched when Clary screamed in pain from when her father entered her.

Jace shook her head but then Clary's last word made up his mind.

"_Please!_"

Jace then did the hardest thing he had ever done in his life.

He turned away.

**Who else is angered by Jace's actions? *slowly raises hand* I'm sorry Jace and Clary are a bit OOC at the moment, but it is called fanfiction for a reason haha, also, you got a sneak peek into Jace's past! What else is in it do you think? Why is it the way he is? Acts the way he does? Review to find out ;) **

**So hope you enjoyed it, and also just thought I'd say it is my birthday today, so you all wanna make it a great day for me and review what you think of the story? Even if you hate it? **

**This then leads to the question of the day. **

**What sort of music do you listen to and who are your favourite bands/artists?**

**Mine: I listen to everything and my favourites would be: Linkin Park, Simple Plan, Good Charlotte, Eminem, Bullet For My Valentine, Greenday, 3 Doors Down, Paramore, Sick Puppies, All American Rejects, Flyleaf, Sum 41, Ed Sheeran, Maroon 5, Avenged Sevenfold, Evanescence and Nightwish are just to name a few, but I can go on all day haha. **

**REVIEW!**

**Until next time xx **


	5. Chapter 5 - Breaking point

Chapter 4 – Breaking point

* * *

Playlist:

Taking Over Me – Evanescence **(scene 1)**

Numb – Linkin Park **(scene 2) **_Imagine this song playing the chorus while Clary is cutting. It just seemed too fitting for the scene to not use it. _

One Step Closer – Linkin Park **(scene 3)**

Fear of the Dark – Iron Maiden **(scene 4 – Jace's flashback song)  
**(Thank you AphraelDawn for your suggestion!)

You Found Me – The Fray** (scene 4)**

* * *

Valentine stood in the hallway of their commission house pacing backwards and forwards waiting for the other end to answer. After four rings the other end picked up.

"Hello?"

Valentine smiled imagining his sons face. The pale blonde hair, so pale that it was almost white. The black eyes and the egotistical attitude that fit well with him.

"Jonathan."

The other line was silent for several moments before he heard a low chuckle from the other end.

"Good evening father. What is on your mind?" Jonathan asked pleasantly and with respect_. At least one of my children respected me,_ Valentine thought bitterly.

"I would like you to come home," He said bluntly.

Silence.

Eventually Jonathan spoke. "How soon?"

"By tomorrow if you could. There is a situation that I need your help with if you're up for it," Valentine explained.

"Of course father, but what is it?" Jonathan asked.

"Well, as I was teaching Clarissa a lesson tonight, she seemed distracted and out of focus, and she was looking towards the window. When I looked I saw a boy retreating from our yard. I'm certain it was Wayland. I think they may be involved with each other and we need to put a stop to it immediately." Valentine instructed.

He could hear Jonathan breathing heavily down the phone from the other end. "Are you certain it was Wayland? Because neither of us have seen him in five years. He could be different."

"No," snapped Valentine. "It was him. I know it was. I would know the golden hair and eyes from a mile away. He looked too much like Celine for me to be mistaken."

"Ok, so what do you want me to do father?" Jonathan asked.

"When you come here I want you to move into our house, and then you will attend school with Clarissa and keep an eye on her. Tell me who she associates herself with. I want you to find out if anyone knows about the lessons that I teach Clarissa and most importantly, I want you to find out if she is involved with Wayland. If she is, I want you to use what you know to do anything you can to break them apart."

"Understood," Jonathan replied. "I'll see you in six hours father."

Valentine smiled with victory. "Excellent."

* * *

Clary came back to consciousness to find herself still on the cold floor of the living room where her father had left her last night after raping her. Clary remembered seeing Jace through the window, and remembered feeling the shock and the relief at seeing him which then turned to horror. She could see it in his eyes – the horrified shock at finding her beneath her father, at the mercy of his brutal fists. She could also see how he was going to run in and try and save her, which would just ruin everything. She quickly told him to leave and after much hesitation and debate, she watched him leave with great pain and anguish on his beautiful face.

He was her angel – her golden angel from the heavens. He was the answer to her prayers and the ending to her pain and suffering. He was her saviour.

But then her father had noticed her staring and turned to see what she had been looking at. She did everything to distract him and make him focus back on her, and eventually it worked. She hadn't known whether he had seen Jace or not. She seriously hoped he hadn't but the punch he delivered to her left temple was so filled with anger it filled her with doubt as she had slipped into the bliss of unconsciousness.

Now, she groaned as she sat up from the floor and slowly stood. All her muscles aching and protesting as she slowly made her way to her room.

Everything she was feeling inside was slowly tearing her apart. The rape, the abuse, the doubt, the low self-esteem and confidence, the loneliness, the betrayal and the hurt. Everything from the day and the previous years all rushed to the surface all at once, and it was almost too much to bare.

Clary half hobbled, half ran to her room – still naked from where she couldn't find her clothes after she had woken up. She seriously suspected that none of the beautiful clothes she was wearing of Isabelle's would be any good now. Her father had either ripped and destroyed them, or they had been destroyed by being covered with Clary's blood.

Once in her room Clary locked her bedroom door and headed for her bathroom where she started running the shower and got in it, once it was a hot temperature. Clary scarcely felt the hot water burning her skin as it came in contact and instead reached for the razor blade that she always kept in the shower for times like these.

Clary slowly slid to the floor of the shower and her hands shook with the release that she badly needed. If she didn't do this now, Clary feared that the bottled up emotions that were suffocating her now were going to kill her.

Without giving it a second thought, Clary dragged the blade of the razor across her wrist opening up a wide and deep cut. She watched with fascination as the blood welled on her wrist and then slowly fell over creating red ribbons of blood to go around her arm and wrist as the droplets fell into the water and tinted it a reddish colour. By now, Clary was use to the metallic taste and the rusty smell of blood and it was the only familiar thing in her life now.

It used to be that Simon and Magnus were the familiars in her life. But ever since Simon kissed her and has now discarded her, he is no longer there for her, and Magnus and Clary are now surrounded by more people than what Clary has ever spoken to in her life.

Isabelle, Alec and Jace Lightwood.

_Jace._

His name brought the tears to her eyes and when she thought about how much she needed him, which caused the tears to spill over, mixing themselves in with the blood and the water pooling at the bottom of the shower. She felt the sadness and pain swelling inside of her again, so quickly she dragged the razor across her other wrist and then made another cut just above that one.

A sob rose to her throat before she could stop it and was completely powerless in stopping the tears from pouring down her face.

She could finally admit it to herself that never before in her life had she ever needed Jace – but just then he was all she needed. He was all she could think about – and secretly – she wished that he was hers.

But how could he want someone so pathetic and broken such as herself?

Just the thought brought a new wave of tears to her eyes and she buried her face in her arms, her mouth slightly under the water at the bottom of the shower and she could taste the metallic taste of the blood on the tip of her tongue.

Eventually Clary had stopped sobbing and stood up on shaky legs still shivering as she made her way into her bedroom and collapsed on her bed.

She knew that she wouldn't be able to face Jace in the morning. How could she when he had seen what he had seen? How helpless and weak she was beneath her father's hands. The thought made new tears to pore down her cheeks as she cried herself to sleep.

* * *

Clary awoke to the sound of cupboards banging and people walking around downstairs. She panicked. For a moment she thought that she had slept in, and as it turned out – she had. It was seven o'clock, instead of six o'clock and so she quickly got out of bed and pulled on a fresh set of clothes. Dark skinny jeans, black long sleeved top so you couldn't see the blood soaking through and a red hoodie to go with it. She shoved her feet in her converses and laced them up before heading into her bathroom to do her hair and make-up. Clary decided to leave her hair down to help cover the bruises spotting on her neck and applied her make-up heavier this morning – focusing mainly around her jaw, temple and her left cheek.

Afterwards Clary headed downstairs to find her father sitting at the table eating some eggs and bacon and a boy with whitish blonde hair with his back to her. Upon her arrival, they both turned to look at her and she gasped at the sight of the boy.

It was her brother. Or half-brother she should say. They shared the same father but his mother was Celine Herondale – a woman that Valentine had had an affair with while still married to her mother.

Her gaze hardened as he turned his black beady eyes on her and he took in her appearance.

"Good morning dear sister of mine," He smirked turning back to the stove where he was making breakfast for himself and their father but not for her.

"I'm not your sister," she spat voice full of venom.

She suddenly felt something solid hit her head – there was a crash and then she could feel blood seeping down the side of her face.

When she looked she saw that her father had thrown his finished dinner plate at her head in anger.

"Do not speak to your brother in that manner Clarissa – show some respect you slut!" he fumed standing up to walk over and slap her face to one side painfully. "And clean that up!" he yelled gesturing towards the broken shards of the dinner plate and she nodded hurriedly, knowing it was no good to try and argue.

As her father left the room she dropped to her hands and knees to pick up all the bits of dinner plate and when she was done she put the remains in the bin and turned to face Jonathan.

"So what are you doing here?" She demanded to know.

Jonathan pretended to look shocked and laid a hand over his heart as if he was hurt. "What? I can't just pop in to see my darling little sis?" he asked.

Clary rolled her eyes impatiently. "Please, don't humour me, you're just like father – abusive and a complete asshole who are best off being dead." She spat.

Jonathan strode over to her and lifted her up to his height by the scruff of her shirt.

"_Never_ talk to me like that _ever_ again. About me, or about our father. His a good man and you're lucky to have him. Got it?" he snarled and thrust Clary away from him in disgust.

Clary rubbed her neck gingerly as Jonathan glared at her. "And to answer your question – I'm here to live for a while. I'll be going to your school with you and be enrolling as a senior so could be in some of your classes with you, isn't that great!" Jonathan said cheerfully.

Clary's eyes widened. If Jonathan was going to be hanging around for a while it meant only one thing. That their father had put him up to it and wanted him to keep an eye on her.

He hadn't done this in almost two years and now that he was back it meant only one thing.

That she was going to have to distance herself from everyone.

Magnus, Isabelle, Alec and – Jace…

That last thought hurt and Clary visibly winced at the thought of not being around her sunshine – her saviour. But there was nothing she could do. She was doing this to protect them. Magnus knew, he had been through this before two years ago – but Clary had a feeling it would be harder to keep Jace away from her and vice versa.

Clary came back to the present to find Jonathan watching her intensely. Squaring off her shoulders and raising her chin she looked her brother in the eyes – determined to show no fear.

"Well, I am leaving now, I'll see you at school I guess," she said.

Jonathan's hand snaked out and gripped her arm in a tight vice grip. "No you are not; you got dishes and a house to clean first."

Clary gave him a disbelieving look. "But I'll be late for school!" she exclaimed.

"Well I'll give you a lift to school in my BMW won't I?" he answered sarcastically moving from the room. There was no time to argue so Clary just moved around the house putting on washing, doing dishes and just tidying up when it was quarter to eight and Jonathan came down dressed and ready to go.

"Ready?" he asked fishing his cars out from the key bowl beside the door.

Clary said not a word as she moved outside and waited outside the passenger's side car door and waited for her brother to unlock the door.

The ride to school was silent and when they pulled into the parking lot she saw a lot of heads turn to look at the flashy car that had just pulled into the school grounds. When Clary climbed out and immediately saw Jace, Magnus, Isabelle and Alec she started to head for them.

When she was close enough to hear what they were saying she realised they were talking about the upcoming football game and who was going to go. However when I approached Jace was the first one to look up.

"Clary!" He yelled and ran over to her. Just before he swept her off her feet he stopped to a halt and carefully hugged her to his chest.

Clary thinking back to this morning and what she was going to have to do wound her arms around his waist and buried her head in his shoulder. It wasn't until he tried to gently pry her off of him that she realised that for the first time ever she was crying not just in front of him – which she _had_ done before – but also in front of everyone else.

"Clary – are you alright?" Jace asked anxiously pulling her back so he could look into her face. Clary opened her mouth prepared for the first time ever to say _'no'_ when another voice bet her to it.

"Herondale."

In her arms Jace stiffened and looked over her head at the form that had joined their small little group.

"It's_ Lightwood_, dickhead." Jace replied coolly.

When Clary turned still in the circle of Jace's arms, which felt oh so right, she turned to see her brother behind her with a snarky smile on his face.

Jonathan shrugged unaffected but she could tell that he was soaking in every bit of information about her friends into his pea-sized brain.

"Words on paper can't change your blood _Herondale_."

At the mention of the name Jace visibly paled.

Clary turned to look up at Jace. "What's he talking about?"

Behind her Jonathan laughed. "Yeah _Jace_, what am I talking about?"

Jace drew in a slow, deep breath. "His talking about my real family, not my adopted family."

* * *

**Flashback:**

"_Jace, come along."_

_Ten year old Jace looked up from where he was staring at the ground to the social worker that had her hand held out to him. Hesitantly Jace let the lady with the soft hazel eyes and brown curly hair to pull him to his feet. _

"_It's time to leave."_

_Jace said nothing as the lady who called herself Rhonda lead him towards the white Sudan that was waiting for them. _

_Jace turned to look back at the averaged size house which was now being engulfed in flames. He could still hear his mother's desperate cries and efforts in trying to push him out of the house while she, her husband Stephen and Jace all choked on the thick smoke clouding the house. _

_He still could hear himself screaming and crying for his mother; saying "no!"_

_But then the fire trucks had turned up. They crashed into the house finding Jace and his now unconscious parents behind him. He felt himself being lifted and being carried outside. _

"_Mum! Mum!" he cried reaching out a hand over the fireman's shoulder. _

"_They will be alright kid," the fireman had said, but even Jace knew that was a lie. _

_An hour later, and the house had been doused in water, and the flames were non-existent. Jace sat on the curb of the street with a heavy blanket draped around his shoulders and a cup of warm milo in between his hands. _

_The police had arrived shortly after the fire trucks and began to ask him several questions. Mostly containing of "how did the fire start?" Jace had told them that his mother had been cooking in the kitchen when there was a bang and when Jace went to investigate with his father at his side, the kitchen was filled with thick black smoke and Jace's coughing mother. The stove had erupted into flames. The fire was quick to claim everything in its path._

_Including Jace's birth parents. _

_The social workers showed up after the police had called them and now Jace was sitting in the backseat of an unfamiliar car heading towards his new home. _

_After an eight hour drive they eventually pulled up outside of a modern and fancy looking two story house and outside a man was waiting. He had blonde wavy hair that mirrored Jace's own hair and blue eyes. __**(AN; sorry if I got Michael's looks wrong. I couldn't remember what he was described like)**__ he stood tall and strong, all of his bicep muscles and chest muscles standing out against the tight fitting t-shirt he wore. _

_Rhonda got out the car first and opened his door for him and then held his hand tightly and encouragingly as she lead him up towards the new man who would become his new father. Jace had no bags or possessions with him because they had all been burned in the fire at his house. _

"_Jace, this is Michael Wayland, he will be your new carer." Rhonda told him as she bent down to Jace's height. _

_Michael held out his hand and shyly Jace shook his hand back. _

"_Well, you're certainly going to capture the ladies in a few years with those looks aren't you son?" Michael laughed clapping him good naturedly on the shoulder. _

_Jace gave a nervous smile but inside he was dying. He missed his mother and her warm hugs. He missed the way his father would play ball with him outside. But most of Jace missed his house. His toys. His home. _

"_Well if that's all I should be going," Rhonda said to Michael and Jace felt a raw fear grip him twisting his stomach painfully. _

"_You're leaving?" Jace asked. _

_Rhonda smiled. "I have to Jace, I have to go help other young boys like yourself." She explained as she walked back down the drive and waved to him over her shoulder. _

"_Don't worry Jace. You'll be happy here," Michael soothed pushing him inside. _

_But he wasn't happy. Michael wasn't his father although he demanded that Jace called him "dad" and as he grew old it changed to "father" and he pushed Jace. He pushed Jace so damn hard in football and sport because he wanted Jace to be the next star and the best of the best. Michael coached all his sports and all his teams. He trained Jace inside of training and outside of training. At home Jace was made to do two hundred push-ups and two hundred sit-ups along with running five km's every morning and night. Jace soon went from soft and weak to hard and strong. _

_When Jace didn't do something or didn't do it right, Michael would hit him. At first it was just slaps, and then it turned to punches until Michael started using the skipping rope and the whip. Jace had many, many scars and spilt lots of blood, but not once did he ever shed a tear. _

_There was to be no whining and no crying in the house and if Jace ever did one of those things, he would cop it badly – so he soon learnt not to do it. _

_Eventually one day, Jace had had enough. He was in the gym lifting weights when he heard Michael entering. _

"_What are you doing Jace?" Michael asked. _

"_Lifting weights like you said," he grunted doing another press. _

"_No you're not, you're lifting crap, what man lifts twenty kilos?" Michael demanded. _

"_A thirteen year old?" Jace replied rather bitterly. _

_Sometimes Jace suspected that his father sometimes forgot that Jace was only thirteen and not seventeen or eighteen years of age. He was still a kid. _

"_Here, lift this," Michael said. _

_Jace watched as Michael went over to the wall and grabbed a fifty kilo weight. Jace thought that Michael was going to swap the twenty kilos for the fifty kilos. So you can imagine Jace's surprise and fear when he placed in on along with the twenty kilos. Now it was weighing seventy. _

_Jace's arms shook and sweat fell from his forehead. He was gasping for breath as the weight began crushing his chest. _

"_Dad, get. It. off." Jace gasped. _

"_No, Jace. You need to get strong so you can be the best and beat every boy in training and getting the scholar ship that we want."_

_It was always _we_, not _Jace.

"_Dad!" Jace yelled and then with a strength Jace didn't know he possessed he rolled to the side and fell off the bench, the weight falling off with him, and Jace gasped for breath. _

"_Don't be a weak little pussy Jace. Get back up, and I want to see you do ten reps of the weight," Michael barked clearly annoyed at Jace's display of weakness. _

"_No, I won't. I can't." he said. _

"_No? NO? I'm sorry, can you repeat that, I thought you just said NO," Michael said furiously striding over to grab Jace by the scruff of the neck. _

_Jace took a deep breath and gained everything he had in himself just then to stand up to his father. _

"_No, I won't. I can't lift the weight father. I'll hurt myself." Jace said. _

_Michael scowled at him. "Pick up those weights and lift them or _I'll_ hurt you," Michael growled. _

_Jace swallowed and glared. "No."_

_Michael's face twisted into something ugly and before Jace knew it, he was being thrown into the far wall near the weights. His back hit the weights painfully and he fell to the ground with a heavy thud, groaning. _

_Jace looked up in time to see Michael running at him. Jace couldn't think. He was driven by fear and his body was on survival mode. _

_He reached behind him and picked up the first weight he put his hands on. Jace almost dropped the weight when he lifted it and when he looked he saw it was a sixty kilo weight. Never before had Jace lifted sixty kilo weight – the most he had ever done was fifty – and even that was hard to do. _

_Without thinking Jace threw it at Michael and unfortunate – or fortunate – depending on who you asked that it hit the side of Michael's head. _

_Michael fell to the ground unconscious. It wasn't until after several seconds that Jace started to notice that there was blood coming out the side of Michael's head. _

_Jace walked over on shaky legs and knelt down beside his father. His fingers probed under Michael's chin looking for his pulse. After a few seconds Jace couldn't find one. _

_He looked into his father's face to see that his eyes were wide open and his mouth was open in a silent scream. It was then that Jace realised that his father was dead. _

_And he had killed him. _

_Jace ran out the room and called the ambulance which by then it was too late, but he did anyway feeling that he had to do _something_. _

_When the ambulance man had asked how this happened Jace lied – he said that one of the weights had fallen off the wall and hit him on the head. _

_The social workers of course were called and Rhonda was back. never before had Jace ever been so glad to see the lady. _

_Rhonda smiled sadly at Jace and hugged him gently. _

"_I'm sorry Jace," she whispered in his ear. _

_Jace nodded and hugged her back as she lead him out of the room and back towards her car. There was no questions needed to know that Rhonda was taking him to his new home. _

_Jace was slightly scared and nervous thinking that the family was going to be like Michael. However – he was pleased when he saw Maryse, Robert and their three children waiting for him. _

_Jace was sent to live with them and they were lovely – but Jace closed himself off. _

_He locked himself in his room, only coming out to go to school or to have dinner, and he never talked with them in fear of saying or doing something wrong. But on Jace's fourteenth birthday when Maryse had baked him a cake and each of them had brought him a present he realised that they were nothing like Michael. _

_Jace slowly began talking to Alec and he realised that he loved the guy. Then there was Izzy. Alec and Jace together never got tired of pulling pranks on her and making it out to look like they hadn't done anything. So they never did get in trouble – but Jace suspected that Maryse knew it was them but she was too pleased with seeing that Jace was finally fitting in and getting along with his siblings that she never chastised them for their little pranks. _

_Jace could say that for the first time in three years, he felt like he belonged, and that he was _loved_, and that he was _happy.

**End of flashback:**

Jace was pulled out of his head by a tugging on his arm. Looking down he saw that Clary was pulling on him.

"Jace, are you alright?" She asked worriedly.

Jace looked at her. He could see the evidence of the abuse from her father on her face on over her throat where it looked like her father had tried to choke her. He remembered the previous day and how he saw her father raping her. Unintentionally he tightened his hold on the girl in his arms, and he never wanted her to move. However, Clary flinched and Jace realised that he was hurting her.

"Yeah, but are you?" He asked giving her a knowing look so that she knew what he was referring to.

Clary blushed. "We'll talk later," she promised whispering in his ear.

"We better," he said.

She nodded and Jace looked up to find that Jonathan was still there and was watching her intensely.

When Jonathan saw that Jace was looking he smirked at Jace.

"I can see you haven't told her the truth Jace," Jonathan teased.

Jace stiffened. "What are you talking about Jonathan?" he demanded.

"Your kidding me right?" Jonathan said. "You haven't told her about your mother and father?"

Jace tensed. "Shut up," he threatened.

Clary looked between them before eventually settling her gaze on Jace.

"What's he talking about Jace?"

Jace opened his mouth to reply but Jonathan bet him to it.

"His your brother Clary."

* * *

**Dun, dun, Duh! Bet you guys never saw that one coming! **

**I would just like to apologise first and for most that this chapter wasnt as long as usual. I wrote this chapter in like 2 hours so I am sorry if it is really bad...**

**Also, I am doing year twelve and I have been finding it extreamely difficult to do homework and update chapters regularly for you guys, so I do apologise if I take too long to upload a chapter but do know that I WILL UPDATE so do not fear :)**

**Question of day: What is your favourite colour and why (if there is a reason) Mine is purple because it is soothing and awesome and the same colour as my birth stone and favourite stone; an amythest. **

**REVIEW! :)**

**~ till next time my lovelies xoxo**


	6. Chapter 6 - Blood doesn't change a thing

Chapter 5 - blood doesn't change a thing.

***Warning!* - You may want a box of tissues for this chapter and you may hate me at the end of the chapter…**

Playlist:

Welcome to the Family - Avenged Sevenfold **(scene 1)**

In Pieces - Linkin Park (yes, I will be using them a lot!) **(Scene 2)**

You'll Be Mine - Havana Brown ft. R3HAB **(Scene 2) **

All I Wanted - Paramore **(Scene 3) **

My Immortal - Evanescence **(Scene 4) **

.o.O.o.

"His your brother Clary."

Jace's head whipped around to look at Jonathan and his mouth hit the ground. Surely Jonathan wouldn't have the nerve to attempt that. Why would Jonathan try to damage something so precious and rare between him and Clary when it had absolutely nothing to do with him? What did he get out of making him and Clary suffering?

"That's a load of shit Jonathan," Clary hissed her fists in Jace's shirt tightening slightly as she curled them into fists of the material.

"I'm with Clary on that one," Jace put in himself tightening his hold on Clary around her waist.

Jonathan raised his hands in the air at a sign of innocence. "Fine but it's not my fault that dad had an affair with Celine Herondale eighteen years ago." Jonathan said with a smirk of his own.

Jace couldn't help the startled gasp that slid between his lips. "_What?!_"

Jonathan then turned his stare from Clary to Jace. "Didn't you know? I thought you did." He said tauntingly as he paced around in a circle. Jace cast a look at Alec, Isabelle and Magnus to see that they were watching Jonathan and Jace with wide eyes.

"Well, as you know you're real birth mother was Celine Herondale and your supposedly 'father' was Stephen Herondale, correct?" Jonathan asked pausing to get Jace's approval. When Jace said nothing, Jonathan took that as a sign to carry on. "Yes, well. _Our_ father, Valentine Morgenstern, well he had an affair with Celine at the same time she was having sex with Stephen." Jonathan said.

"Then that's no solid proof that Valentine is my father," Snapped Jace.

"Ah, well yes, that is true. Except for well, the message that she sent to Valentine three weeks later after their _ordeal_ saying that they needed to talk and that they had a _problem_." Jonathan laughed. "Even back then you were a problem Jace."

As Jace stood there he felt his hands curling into fist and in his arms he felt Clary wince. Jace looked down in surprise to find that he was clutching her waist rather tightly, and he knew, had she not have had bruises on her hips and waist, his hold on her would have not hurt. But the fact that she did and that he was the one who hurt her sent a rush of horrification running through him.

"I'm so sorry Clary," he apologized quickly.

Clary shook her head distractedly. "It's fine."

"Anyway," continued Jonathan "Valentine met up with Celine and they discussed what they were going to do. Celine confirmed that Valentine was indeed the father but he didn't want anything to do with the baby or Celine anymore seeing as he had his own son and wife back at home. Celine was furious with Valentine so when she went back home she told Stephen that you were his, and only she and Valentine ever knew the truth until he told me." Jonathan smiled.

"So why are you telling us this?" Clary asked.

"Well I can see that you guys are close and incest is just disgusting, so I wanted you guys to know _now_ rather than _later_." he said.

Clary flushed a deep red. "We're not together." she said.

Jonathan looked shocked and raised his eyebrows. "You're not?"

Jace shook his head. "No, we're just friends." he confirmed.

Jonathan was silent for a few seconds before he started to chuckle. "Huh, well you could have fooled me."

Clary looked at Jace and he looked back down at her.

"So, we're…. related?" She asked hesitantly in a small voice.

When Jace spoke his own voice shook. "Well supposedly… we have the same father…" he began slowly.

Clary suddenly reefed herself out of Jace's arms and he watched her in shock as she stood in front of him with her arms wrapped around her waist as if to protect herself.

"Clary are you ok?" He asked. He noticed that Clary had gone awfully pale and looked as if she was going to be sick. Silently she nodded. It was then that Jace caught sight of the cut that was on the side of her left temple and was bleeding. Slowly he stepped forward and put two careful fingers to the cut.

"God, what happened?" he asked quietly.

Clary shook her head and looked down at the ground. "I-I walked into the door frame this morning." she mumbled.

Jace could barely hold in the scoff of disbelief when Jonathan suddenly laughed.

"God that was funny," he said gabbing his stomach as his body trembled with laughter.

"Excuse me," Clary muttered and turned to walk off inside of the school building.

As Jace watched Clary leave, out of the corner of his eye he saw Jonathan watching her like some sort of predator. Jace's hands curled into fists when he recognized it was the same look that her father had had last night while he was raping and beating her. Deciding then that it wouldn't be a good idea to leave Clary alone Jace called out to her and started to run after her.

"Clary! Wait up!"

She turned her head to look at him, but she didn't slow. She steadily made her way through the growing crowd of the students and he intuitionally knew where she was heading. The music room.

Jace watched as Clary slipped into the music room and wordlessly, he followed.

.o.O.o.

Clary didn't turn to face Jace until she heard the sound of the door closing and Jace's warm breath tickling the back of her neck.

"Clary…"

Now, she turned. She looked up at the boy in front of her and couldn't help but feel mesmerized by his looks. His slightly curled blonde hair hung down in front of his eyes and he pushed it away with an impatient gesture. The white sleeveless singlet that he wore showed off the very, _very_ nice arm and chest muscles that he had going on making Clary want to reach out and run her fingers delicately through every crevice of his wash-board abs. the denim jeans that he wore hung loose on his hips so that they came to his knees and showed off the distinct 'v' shape of his hips. Clary was suddenly finding it very hard to catch her breath.

"What Jace?" She asked tiredly moving to sit on the stool of the piano. Jace followed.

"What really happened to your head? You know you don't have to lie to me," he said.

Clary looked down and bit her bottom lip before looking back up to meet Jace's eyes.

"Valentine threw a plate at me and it broke when it hit my head." she admitted looking away.

Gently Jace reached out and grabbed her chin, turning it back around so she was looking at him. "I will kill your asshole father one day, I promise," Jace swore and Clary grimaced slightly. "Clary…" Jace began hesitantly but then trailed off.

Clary's eyes flashed up to look at him. "What is it Jace?" she asked.

"I – just – h-has Jonathan ever done something to you? Like what your father does sort of thing?" He asked nervously.

Clary blushed and looked away. "Occasionally he will help dad in dealing with my _punishments_."

Jace clenched his teeth together and reached out to give Clary a light hug.

Her arms wrapped around his waist and Jace closed his eyes, losing himself in the feel of her. The idea that she could be his sister made him feel sick to his stomach and he knew that it couldn't possibly be true. The feelings that he had for the girl in his arms were none of those that you feel for a sister. All he could think of when he held Clary in his arms was what the feel of her lips would feel like on his. Would her lips be soft, warm and moist? Would they be demanding or hesitant? Would she lean into him or move away? The suspense was killing him in not knowing. Did she even feel the attraction to him as he did with her?

Slowly Clary started to pull back and Jace unwillingly let her go. When they sat side by side on the bench again Jace once again caught sight of the cut on her left temple. He stood up and started to walk towards the door when Clary called out to him.

"Where are you going?" She asked.

"To get the first aid kit. Just stay here, I'll be back in a minute." He said.

She just nodded looking very innocent and Jace wanted nothing more than to sweep her into his arms and take off somewhere with her where her father or Jonathan could never find her.

He raced out of the music room and was close to the sick bay when he ran into Jonathan.

"Jace! I was wondering where you and Clary went." he then seemed to notice that Clary wasn't with him. "Where is she?"

"That's none of your business," he said coldly.

Jonathan's smile suddenly disappeared and was replaced for a cruel smirk instead.

"Of course it's my business. She's my sister. I have rights." he said stepping closer towards Jace.

Jace held his ground. "But she's my sister too right? All I'm doing is protecting her."

Jonathan scoffed. "From what?"

Jace stepped forward now, narrowing his eyes threateningly. "If I ever see you hurting her, or if she tells me that you have laid even a finger on her, I promise you, I will murder you."

The smirk on Jonathan's face disappeared and was replaced by a look of loathing hate. But somehow Jace didn't think it was directed towards him. "She told you?"

Jace didn't have to ask to know that he was talking about the abuse. "Yes."

"Oh, she is in so much trouble." Jonathan growled under his breath but Jace heard him.

"If you or your psychopath father touches her, I will make sure you are both put behind bars." Jace growled.

Jonathan laughed. "Stay away from my sister or I'll make sure you _disappear_ for good." retorted Jonathan.

"You have no control over me or Clary." Jace snapped.

"Actually, Clary is that terrified of me and her father that we _do_ control her."

Jace didn't say anything in return. The anger that he suddenly felt inside he had to get rid of before he did something stupid – or in his eyes, something right. For example, breaking Jonathan's nose.

Spinning on his heels, Jace practically ran down the hall to the sick bay and when he burst through the door the nurse looked up startled.

"Hi, Do you have a first aid kit I can borrow?" Jace asked breathlessly.

Surprised and a bit flustered the nurse turned in her office. "Yes, it's just here. Do you need some help?" She asked kindly.

Jace shook his head. "I can manage."

The nurse bit her lower lip. "Ok… well just be sure to bring the kit back alright?"

"Sure thing," Jace muttered as he took off out of the office and back towards the music room.

As he approached the hallway where music room was, Jace looked around just to make sure that he wasn't being followed.

As he entered, he walked in quietly and closed the door silently behind him. Clary was still sitting where he left her on the piano stool so he crossed the room over to her. As Jace sat down Clary turned her face up to look at him.

"You took a while just to get a first aid kit," Clary stated.

"Yes, well, I ran into your brother," Jace said with a grimace as he pulled out the wash cloths.

"Our brother," muttered Clary.

"What?"

"His _our_ brother Jace."

"I don't want to think about that, Clary." Jace said darkly as he gently pressed a Band-Aid to the cut and ran his thumb carefully over it.

"Why? It's hard to avoid Jace." Clary curtly.

"Because! Because I-I'd rather… rather be doing this…" Jace whispered leaning in towards her.

As Jace drew in towards her he could feel the warmth of her skin radiating off her body and smell the mint on her breath and the strawberries in her hair.

Jace heard Clary's breath catch in her throat as his nose brushed across her left cheek. He was so close now that he could practically taste the softness of her lips on his. He was so, _so_ close now. All he had to do was tip his chin up and their lips would touch…

But it never came.

Jace opened his eyes which had closed on their own accord to find that Clary wasn't coming closer, but was retreating. She was looking up at him with wide eyes and lips that were parted in shock. The mere thought of her pulling away from him had rendered him speechless.

"W-What are you doing, Jace?" Clary asked sounding a little bit breathless.

"I like you Clary. Like a lot, a lot. I don't believe we are siblings because if we were I wouldn't feel what I feel for you. I wouldn't want to kiss you, or to hold you like I do. I wouldn't want you to be at my side, or to look at me the way I look towards you. Don't you feel it? Don't you feel the same attraction or the same spark that I do whenever we touch?" Jace begged.

Clary stood up and walked back several steps while shaking her head. "No… this is wrong Jace." She whispered. "You shouldn't care for me. You shouldn't like me. I'm too messed up! My insides are all fucked up and I have to wear so much make-up each day just to pass as presentable! My skin is deathly white because of the long sleeves I wear to hide the bruises! God!" Clary exclaimed.

"I don't care Clary! I don't care! I think Jonathan is just making up this bullshit story to keep you from finding happiness with me. He could see that I made you happy so he wanted to ruin it by planting this lie on us. I think you are beautiful inside and out. I can see past the pain, the walls that you place around yourself, and the makeup that you wear. I can see the beauty that I know is inside of you. You yourself need to find the confidence in being able to show the beauty that you know you possess." Jace said finishing in a pant.

Clary didn't say anything in return, she just stood there staring at Jace with those wide green eyes that he couldn't say no to.

"I have to go Jace. I have class to go to and so do you. Thanks for helping me with my cut." She mumbled turning away.

Jace reached out to grab Clary's wrist before she could leave. "Clary. Tonight is my little brother's birthday party. He's turning nine and I'd love if you would come."

"Would you pick me up from my house?" She asked quietly.

Quickly, Jace nodded eagerly. "Of course."

Clary smiled slightly as she opened the door. "Great. When does it start?"

"I'll pick you up at eight." Jace said.

Clary nodded. "Ok, bye Jace."

Jace watched as Clary walked down the hallway to her class and so unwillingly Jace turned to go to his. As Jace slipped into his biology class the teacher Ms. Hynn didn't even look up at his entry, only Kaelie did. As Jace looked around he swallowed a groan when he saw that the only free seat was behind Kaelie.

Slowly Jace made his way to the seat that the same time he saw that the upcoming test to be done the next day. Groaning as Jace realized that he had missed more than half of the class and that it was too late to try and take notes he reluctantly addressed Kaelie in front of him.

"Hey Kaelie."

In front of him Kaelie spun around in her seat to fix Jace with what she thought was one of her smiles but actually made Jace want to throw a bag over his head.

"Hey Jace," Kaelie said in a flirtatious voice.

"Look can I borrow your notes tonight for the test tomorrow please?" He asked.

Kaelie raised a finger to her lips and pretended to think about it. "But why? Where were you? If you were here on time like you should have been you wouldn't need mine would you?" She teased biting her lower lip slightly.

"Where and what I was doing is none of your business Kaelie. So can I have your notes or not?" He demanded impatiently.

Kaelie giggled seductively. "You can… but with a price." She gave him a wink.

"I'm not having sex with you Kaelie," Jace stated straight away.

"Who says that is what I wanted?"

"That's what you always want," Jace pointed out.

"Hmm, true, but only your sex baby," she gave him another wink. "But no, in this case I would like you to invite me to your little brother's party tonight."

Jace looked at her shocked. "How did you know about that?"

"I overheard you talking to Clary when you invited _her_. I was going to the toilet when I saw and heard the two of you." she giggled.

"Fine, you can come, but don't expect anything to happen between the two of us alright? Because nothing is ever going to happen between us ever again."

"Because of Clary." Kaelie said flatly. "You know, what you feel for her is wrong you know?"

Jace was a taken back. "What?"

"Incest. Being in love with your _sister_? Not cool Jace. I could make you feel so much more than what she ever could, the frigid little bitch."

Jace ground his teeth together as he glared at her, struggling to keep a rein on his anger. "Take that back."

"Why should I? It's true and if I can't come tonight then you don't get my notes. And you need them to pass the test so you can get into the football college you want to right?"

Clenching his teeth together he addressed Kaelie. "Fine, you win, but don't expect me to hang around you at the party." he spat.

"Nuh uh! Not so fast! If I give you the notes, you have to act as my date and stay by my side all night." she said.

Jace glared. "You're doing this to hurt Clary aren't you?"

Kaelie smiled sweetly back at him. "I never said I wasn't."

Suddenly the bell rang and Jace couldn't seem to get out of his seat quick enough to get out the door and as far away from Kaelie as he could.

"See you soon Jace!" Kaelie called and Jace shuddered at the high pitch of her voice. It almost sounded like when nails were being scrapped down a chalk board.

'_Oh god, what have I gotten myself into_?' Jace thought as he ran out of the school to head home.

.o.O.o.

Clary had just finished straightening her hair to perfection and was now staring at herself in the mirror. The tight black dress she wore with three-quarter length sleeves to hide the bruises fell to the middle of her thighs and the fishnet stockings covered the few bruises over her legs. She had aimed for a smoky eyed look for her makeup and had admitted to herself that she looked pretty hot. Her hair hung down to almost the middle of her back in perfect straight strands. On her feet she just wore some black slip on shoes and held a black clutch in her right hand which had her phone some money and a stick of her favorite lip gloss that Isabelle had given to her. She was just checking herself out in her mirror when she heard a knock at the front door and she instantly knew it was Jace. Smiling she quickly went to answer the door before Jonathan or her father could, but as she got into the hall she could see she was too late because Jonathan was already there opening the door, but Clary was right beside him.

When Jonathan had opened the door, the first thing that Jace saw was Clary and how beautiful she was that his breath had been caught in his throat. It took him several seconds to speak after clearing his throat nervously.

"You look beautiful Clary." He said.

She beamed as she looked him up and down. He was wearing a white dress shirt collar that had been carefully pressed with a dark pair of jeans. He wore the same shoes that he wore to school but he looked as if he had attempted to style his hair with some hair wax. Even though he wasn't overly dressed up Clary still couldn't help the blush that worked its way into her cheeks.

"You don't look so bad yourself, Jace." she commented shyly.

"Oh barf," groaned Jonathan causing them both to look at him. "But it's alright Clary because you aren't going."

Clary's mouth dropped open in surprise while Jace glared at him.

"Excuse me?" Clary gaped.

"You heard me Clarissa."

"You're not the boss of her," Jace added furiously reaching out to take Clary's hand.

"I am when our father isn't home," Jonathan said. "And I know for a fact that if he saw you dressed like a slut he wouldn't let you out either."

Clary blushed furiously and tried to look away from Jace but she didn't need to worry because Jace was stepping forward so that he was right in Jonathan's face again.

"What did you call her?" Jace asked dangerously.

"A slut."

"Say that again asshole," threatened Jace.

Clary decided then to try and intervene. "Jace, let's just go."

"No, Clary. He can't call you that. I won't let him." Jace said pushing Clary gently so that she was behind him on the front porch.

Jonathan had been watching the two of them with a smug smile on his face.

"Call Clary that again and you will regret it," Jace threatened.

A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he regarded Jace in amusement. "Clary is a _slut_." he said slowly just to antagonize Jace even further.

Jace didn't reply as his right fist came out, catching Jonathan by surprise as Jace hit him across his jaw. Jonathan fell back through the front door and fell back on his back painfully as Jace stood over him.

"I _never_ want to hear you call Clary names like that when I am around because next time I will do worse, believe me.

Jonathan swiftly stood to his feet and regarded Jace coolly. "Know this Jace _Lightwood_. You will regret this. Just know that."

Jace snorted. "What are you going to do? Run and tell daddy?" Jace snickered.

"Well yes, and Clary will pay for that not you. But tonight you will regret laying one of your filthy hands on me."

Clary was looking at Jace and noticed that he paled when Jonathan said about her copping it for his actions. Nervously, Clary tugged on Jace's shirt so that he'd turn his attention towards her.

"Come on Jace. Let's just go."

Jace nodded and stepped back, looping his arm around Clary's waist which she was now comfortable with him doing so. Walking quickly towards his car he opened the passenger's door for her to climb in and shut the door after her.

The ride to Jace's house was silent and Clary could feel the tension coming off of Jace that she was too terrified to say anything. It wasn't until they were close to his house that Jace spoke.

"Clary… I'm so sorry." He said grasping her hand from across the console of the car and squeezed her hand lightly.

"For what?"

Jace grimaced. "You heard what Jonathan said. You're going to pay for my actions, and I know you are going to be hurt. So I'm sorry." He said.

Clary smiled slightly and squeezed his hand back.

"It's ok Jace."

He then turned to look at her and he regarded her in surprise. "No it's not ok Clary. I don't want you to ever be hurt. By me or someone else, and I feel like it's my job to protect you."

"You don't have to feel obligated like that Jace. We're friends."

"Yeah, but friends look out for one another," he said.

Clary merely shrugged because they had then pulled up to the Lightwood's house and Clary could see that there were people outside and on the patios of the house already. The house was _massive_. A double story, white bricked house with old farm house windows and wood railings surrounding the house's perimeter.

People stood outside on the lawn where fairy lights were hanging overhead with lanterns hanging precariously here and there while the speakers from inside belted out the latest tunes.

They climbed up the stairs together and when they walked in they found everyone was either dancing in the lounge room or where they were standing throughout the house. As Jace and Clary made their way through the house they spotted Alec, Magnus and Isabelle in the lounge room with who Clary assumed to be Max.

He was a cute looking kid, very small with mop like brown hair and the same blue eyes that both Alec and Isabelle possessed. On the ridge of his nose sat a pair of glasses which he continually kept pushing back up his nose.

Max looked up as Jace and Clary entered and he immediately jumped to his feet.

"Jace! Look what Izzy got me!" exclaimed Max as he launched himself into Jace's arms.

Max held out a manga book to Jace to look at and Clary felt a stab of envy towards Max for having the book. Clary could remember back in primary school when her and Simon would sit there through numerous lunchtimes reading all the comics and manga books that the school possessed.

"That's very nice Max, but, what is it?" Jace asked genuinely curious.

"It's a manga book Jace. Sort of like a comic but better," said Clary stepping forward and smiling at the boy.

Max looked up at her with a sort of awe struck face before he broke out into a grin. "You must be the girl Jace kept telling me about!" cried Max excitedly. "Though I must say you are much prettier than what Jace led me on to believe," he said making the others chuckle as Clary went bright red.

Jace had been talking about her? The thought made all sorts of warm feelings travel through her body before settling on contentment.

"Sorry to let you down then Max," joked Jace as he ruffled Max's hair before setting him back on his feet.

"Happy birthday too Max," said Clary as Jace stepped back so he was beside her again.

"Thanks Clary! You know, you're really nice," he said.

She smiled. "Thanks Max."

"You know," added Max conversationally. "I don't really know how to read these books."

Clary grinned. "Maybe I could show you one day," she said.

Max's face broke out into a grin and he skipped forward to wrap his arms around her waist in a hug. "I'd love that Clary."

Clary just smiled while Jace chose that moment to cut in.

"Well this is all very nice and everything, but Clary and I are going to dance now," he said.

Clary looked at him surprised. "We are?"

Jace chuckled. "Yes, we are." he said as they cut through the crowd to find the dance floor in the main room of the house.

"Your house really is big and impressive," she stated as Jace twirled her and rested his hands on her hips as her arms went around his neck.

"You think this is good? You should wait until you see the library and the cinema room," he said.

Clary stared at him with her mouth gaping open. "You have a _cinema_?" she demanded.

Jace shrugged easily. "Sure we do. We often get all the movies before the actual cinema in town does."

Clary shook her head in disbelief. "That's just nuts."

"No, what's nuts is this dance move," he said.

Clary opened her mouth intending to answer but before she could Jace had picked her up and spun her around in a circle before throwing her up in the air and catching her just as smoothly again.

When Clary was back on her feet in a sort of daze she regarded Jace sternly. "_Never_ do that again."

His answer was just a chuckle as they continued to dance their bodies rubbing against one another's.

Had this been someone else, Clary would have felt highly uncomfortable, but it was Jace, and she trusted Jace with her life and she knew that he wouldn't hurt her. She smiled and closed her eyes as Jace spun her so that her back was pressed against his chest and they swayed to the beat. Clary was in pure happiness before a voice startled her out of her dreamland with Jace.

"Jace."

Clary opened her eyes to find Kaelie standing in front of her wearing a dress that barely covered her ass and showed so much cleavage that it left little to the imagination.

She groaned and she felt Jace stiffen behind her.

"Kaelie," he answered her coldly.

"I thought you said you'd dance and be with me tonight," she said with a sickening pout of her lips which she thought was cute.

"I did," confirmed Jace. "But at the moment I am dancing and spending time with Clary. I'll get to you later." he said before turning back to Clary.

Kaelie sent a glare of death towards Clary before grasping Jace by his upper arm.

"But remember our deal?" She whined annoyingly.

Jace scowled and glared at her. "_Fine_, but only _one_ dance, got it?" he said as Kaelie looped her arm though his effectively pushing Clary aside as she did so.

"I wouldn't count on that babe," Kaelie said kissing Jace's cheek so he had a lipstick mark on him as if she was marking her territory.

"Jace?" Clary asked in a quiet voice standing there awkwardly.

Jace turned to look at her with such a heartbroken expression that Clary felt her own heart break a little.

"I'll come back, I promise." he said before Kaelie lead him to another spot on the dance floor and threw her arms around his neck and after much hesitation Jace placed his hands on her waist.

Clary stood there watching them when she could feel the tears brimming her eyes. Stubbornly she blinked them back as walked out the room and into the next which she discovered was the kitchen. She was surprised to find that Magnus and Isabelle were in there with Alec sitting beside Magnus.

"Hey Clary, what are you doing here? I thought you were dancing with Jace?" Isabelle asked as she poured a cup of coke for her.

"Well I was, but then he was stolen from me," she said taking a swing of her drink.

"You should have stolen him back!" Isabelle said laughing slightly. "Who did you lose him to anyway?"

Clary grimaced. "Kaelie."

Isabelle made a face of disgust. "That slut! Why would Jace dance with her? He could catch all kinds of diseases."

Clary found herself laughing along with Alec and Magnus. "She said something about a deal that he made with her."

Isabelle looked thoughtful for a moment. "Can't imagine with what," she said.

"That makes two of us." Clary muttered. "What's with the soft drink anyway? Where's the hard stuff?" she asked.

"It's Max's party so we weren't allowed to have any alcohol," Isabelle explained.

"Ah," said Clary taking another drink.

Isabelle's eyes suddenly drifted from her to over Clary's shoulder when she suddenly choked on her drink.

"You alright Izzy?" Alec asked reaching over to pat his sister on her back.

Still coughing, Isabelle shook her head and pointed to something over Clary's head. When she saw what it was she felt her whole world freeze and her heart shatter.

Jace had Kaelie pressed up against the wall kissing her fiercely. One hand was on her waist and the other was in her hair while Kaelie's hands were fisted in the material of Jace's shirt.

"Oh that is so gross," Isabelle said wrinkling her nose.

Clary suddenly stood up needing to go outside to get some air – or to go home. As she stood up, in her hast, she knocked over her drink spilling it all over the counter.

"Whoa! Clary!" Isabelle exclaimed jumping back to avoid from getting drink on her clothes. "You feeling ok?"

"Y-Yeah, I just have t-to go outside," she said running out the room and running past Jace and Kaelie who had now broken apart.

Jace was watching Clary with a horrified look while Kaelie looked smug, as if she just won some sort of war.

"Clary – wait!" Jace called after her.

"Leave me alone Jace!"

"It's not what it looks like! I can explain!" Jace yelled.

"You don't need to!" She shouted back at him as she raced outside.

She burst outside where she crossed to a nearby tree bending over at the waist feeling as if she was about to be sick.

"Clary? Are you ok?" Asked a small voice.

Clary turned to see Max standing behind her with his manga book clutched to his chest.

"Y-Yeah Max, I'm just f-fine… what are you doing out here?" she asked.

"I saw you run outside and you looked really upset, so I followed to see if I could make you feel better."

Clary smiled. "Thanks Max, but I-I just need to be alone."

"Hello dear sister of mine," said another voice and Clary spun to find Jonathan leaning against the tree she had just previously been standing beside.

"What are you doing here Jonathan?" She asked tiredly.

"I could ask you the same question. I told you not to come here, did I not? Now you have to be punished accordingly." he said evilly with a smirk to go with it.

"Jonathan, please, can we not do this now? I really don't feel like it," she said turning back to face Max. "Why don't you go back inside Max?"

"No!" Jonathan cut in sharply. "Come here boy," Jonathan ordered.

Max looked between Clary and Jonathan with frightened eyes.

"Jonathan, leave him alone!" Clary yelled reaching out to take Max's hand but Jonathan bet her to it.

He had reached out and gabbed Max's arm pulling him towards his own body while Max made a sound of surprise. It was then that Clary caught sight of the knife in Jonathan's hands. Looking between him and Max, she knew what Jonathan was planning to do.

"No! Jon-" but she was too late.

Clary raced forward but froze to the spot when Jonathan put the knife through Max's side making the boy scream out in pain and terror. Clary opened her mouth in shock but no sound came out.

"_MAX_!" Came another's voice and Clary saw Jace sprinting down the stairs of the front porch to catch the falling Max as Jonathan let him go.

Jace caught Max easily and laid him gently on the ground as Max's eyes started to close while blood stained his gamer t-shirt that he was wearing. Max reminded her so much of a younger Simon that it made her heart ache painfully.

Jace looked up from Max to look loathingly at Jonathan as he stood to his feet.

"I. Will. Kill. You!" Roared Jace as he sprung towards Jonathan, but Jonathan saw it coming and side-stepped Jace's advance with a cruel smile.

"I told you, you would regret punching me. Now you can see." Jonathan explained calmly while Clary could only stare at Max who was growing paler and weaker by the minute.

"By killing an innocent young boy?!" Demanded Jace stalking towards Jonathan again.

"Well, he means something to you, and I know out of all the Lightwood's siblings you were closest to him and I knew it would hurt you. _That's_ why I did it. And there is also something about killing an innocent that just gives me some sort of pleasant chill." Said Jonathan backing away from the scene.

"You. Are. Dead!" Jace screamed flinging himself at Jonathan once again but Jonathan merely brushed him impatiently to the side, sending Jace into a tree.

"Jace!" Clary called from her spot on the ground beside Max.

Jace pushed himself up from the ground to find that Jonathan was no longer there when he stood up.

"Where is he?" Jace snarled looking around for Jonathan.

"I don't know… but Jace… Max…" Clary said quietly while a few tears slipped down her cheeks at seeing tears on Jace's own cheeks.

"Is he ok? How's he doing?" Jace asked anxiously kneeling beside Clary.

"I-I don't know but I don't think his going to make it," Clary whispered.

"No… No he has to make it. Come on Maxi, talk to me buddy," Jace whispered leaning down to hear if Max was breathing.

"Jace? OH MY GOD! MAX!" screamed Isabelle as she flew towards Jace and Clary. "ALEC!"

Seconds later Alec appeared beside them.

"Jesus! What the hell happened?!" Asked Alec pressing two fingers to the Max's pulse.

"I-I'm so sorry… It was my fault," Clary whispered.

"Clary! This is not your fault! Don't you dare blame yourself!" Jace yelled at her.

She opened her mouth to reply when Alec suddenly choking on a gasp distracted her.

"Max!" Alec screamed out in anguish.

"What?!" Isabelle asked frantically while brushing the hair back from Max's forehead.

"His pulse just stopped beating!"

"NO!" Jace cried.

"His dead," Clary whispered, tear sliding down her cheeks.

.o.O.o.

**So… I realize you all want to kill me right now huh? *nervous face* First of all I make Jace and Clary NEARLY kiss and then create the sexual tension between them and then I top it off by killing Max? Geez I am seriously really mean…**

**But please let me know if I made you cry, or if you hate me in the reviews. **

**Question of the day:**** Do you like the songs I put in the Playlist and do you listen to the songs that you haven't heard of before? Let me know!**

**REVIEW! **

**~Till next time my lovelies xoxo**


	7. Chapter 7 - Should I Say Goodbye?

Chapter 6 – Should I say goodbye?

**First of all, I must apologise for the long wait. I didn't plan on letting it take this long so I hope this was worth the wait and satisfies you all beautiful people. **

**Secondly, you may have noticed I changed my name, but don't fret, it's still me ;P**

* * *

Playlist:

Kryptonite – 3 Doors Down **(scene 1 – Jace and Clary)**

Gone too soon – Simple Plan **(scene 2 - Jace)**

Lights of my Hometown – Aaron Lines **(scene 3 – Clary and Jocelyn)**

Call me Maybe – Carly Rae Jepsen _*I absolutely loathe this song, but it was too perfect for the scene not to use it_*_ ;D _**(Scene 4 – Alec and Magnus) **

* * *

The crowd of mourning people were silent as they carried the coffin out of the church on their shoulders. Jace and Alec were leading the front with Robert and a close family friend Hodge in the middle and two other Lightwood relatives that Jace had never met carried the end of the coffin as they marched towards the slick black limo waiting out the front for them so it could transport Max's body to the cemetery where the rest of the crowd would follow.

Jace stepped to the side as did Alec who then came to stand by Jace's side and clap a hand over Jace's shoulder in a comforting gesture.

"How are you holding up?" Alec asked him in a low voice.

Jace looked out at the crowd as they climbed in their cars and started to drive off not answering. The guilt that he felt on the inside was shown on his face plain enough that anyone could see it. The sun was shining low over the horizon making Jace squint in its bright light. People wearing black everywhere were dissipating as quickly as what the night was arriving. It was almost as if the blackness of their clothes and the darkness that the air was polluted with was inviting the night to arrive quicker to engulf everyone in its hold. As Jace watched all the people leaving there was a sudden flash of colour that caught his attention.

Clary was getting in the car with Isabelle, the car that Jace and Alec too would be travelling in. As she opened the car door she cast a look over her shoulder and that was when she caught sight of Jace standing there like a statue. Jace could tell by the silent tears that were running down Clary's face that the guilt he felt inside of him at not being able to save his little brother was nothing to the guilt that Clary would be feeling – believing that she was the sole reason for Max's death. Had Clary not gone outside and stayed inside like she should have then she would have never ran into Jonathan, and Jonathan never would have stabbed Max.

Clary turned back to Isabelle in the car and said something before closing the door and making her way over to Jace and Alec. Beside him, Jace heard Alec sigh impatiently as if he knew that he wouldn't be able to capture Jace's attention – not with Clary around.

"I'll see you in the car, Jace," Alec muttered before walking off to give Jace and Clary a moment.

Clary watched with nervous eyes as Alec left her and Jace and she stood there hugging her elbows to her chest as they stared at one another. Clary looked stunning – she wore a simple black dress that fell to her knees with a long sleeved black sequined cardigan covering her arms. Her hair was being held back by a big brown clip and Isabelle had obviously gotten to Clary with her makeup. Jace wanted nothing more in that moment that to take her in his arms and release that beautiful red hair from its prison in the clip and let it fall freely down her shoulders the way he liked it.

"How are you doing?" Clary asked quietly, echoing what Alec had asked him.

Jace shrugged his shoulders. "As good as can be expected I guess," he mumbled kicking at the stone near his foot.

Clary stepped forward and rested her hand on Jace's bicep. A rush of warmth ran through Jace at her touch and his eyes flew up to look at her face in time to see her blushing as well.

"It's not your fault Jace. Don't blame yourself," she said sincerely.

Jace's eyes searched hers, gold meeting green in a fiery passion. "It's not yours either," he whispered.

Clary sucked in a quick breath and stepped back. "Don't be stupid Jace, of course it was my fault. I was the one that was supposed to be stabbed. Max was out there because of me. It was me that Jonathan wanted, not Max." she said tear sliding down her beautiful face.

"But _I_ was the one who made Jonathan mad. He was mad at me, not _either_ of you. I was the one who _should_ have been stabbed."

Jace didn't know what to say. Obviously he could stand there all night and try and convince her that it wasn't her fault, but he could also tell that by the look on her face she wasn't about to believe him anymore than if Jace was to openly admit that he felt no grief towards his lost brother. They both would be lying to themselves and one another.

Instead, he grimaced and reached out to put his arm around Clary's shoulder. At first she tensed when he touched her, but when she saw that he wasn't going to hurt her, she relaxed.

"Come on, let's get in the car, we have to get to the cemetery," he told her as he steered her towards the awaiting car.

He opened the backdoor to the black car for her and climbed in after her closing the door with a thud as Alec from the driver's seat and Isabelle from shotgun turned to look at them.

"Everything alright?" Isabelle asked her eyes clearly on her brother. There were dark lines around her eyes where she had obviously wiped at her eyes to dry the tears, but in the process had smudged her makeup. Jace also noticed with a start that he wasn't the only one with the dark circles under his eyes from the lack of sleep in the past week. He had noticed it on Alec, and just thought that he and Alec were grieving more than what Izzy and Clary were, but then realised how stupid he was for thinking that when he realised that they covered their dark circles with makeup.

"Yeah, we're good," he said while reaching across the seats to take Clary's hand in his. She looked up and gave him a small smile.

"Ready to go?" Alec asked in a grim voice.

"Yeah," Clary said quietly as Alec pulled out of the park and drove down the street.

The car ride was silent, everyone being lost in their own thoughts, and the mood was too dull to talk anyway.

Jace looked at Clary out of the corner of his eye to see that she had her elbow on the handle of the door and was resting her head on her hand while she gazed miserably out the window. The stupid girl was putting herself through more torment than what she already went through with her father and brother.

With the hand that Jace was already holding he gently began to rub his thumb carefully over her knuckles.

Clary stiffened and turned towards Jace and fixed her bright emerald eyes on his. Jace returned her look steadily and gazed at her in a way a brother shouldn't. there was no need for words as they looked at one another because a blush started to pool in Clary's cheeks as she turned back to the window. But Jace noticed that her breathing was slightly quicker and that she continued to sneak looks at him when she thought he wasn't looking.

Jace grinned. Maybe she did return his feelings after all. He just had to break through the stone wall she kept around herself. Realising this Jace smiled wider. He had always loved a challenge.

* * *

They pulled up to the cemetery and Jace held out his hand to help Clary out the car as she stood.

"Thanks," She muttered walking past him to stand on the grass.

He just nodded as he closed the door and joined her on the grass. They watched as Alec and Isabelle got out the car just as the other car that carried Max's body pulled up beside them.

Jace clenched his jaw together as he kept his emotions in check. Beside him he heard a small sound and saw that Clary was crying, as was Isabelle who was tucked under Alec's arm protectively.

Maryse and Robert stood beside the car, Maryse crying as Robert held her in his arms. It was the first time that Jace has seen them like that, Jace mused.

They all gathered around the spot where Max was going to be lowered into the ground and the priest said a few words.

"Maxwell Lightwood was a beloved son of Maryse and Robert and brother of Alec, Isabelle, Jace. He was taken from the world too soon as a mere boy, but now has journeyed on to a new dimension where he will live a new life and move on as he watches over his loved one's left on earth."

The priest paused to look around at the small crowd that had come and his gaze rested on Isabelle and Maryse longer than anyone else.

"May you rest in peace Maxwell. If anyone has any last words, please say them now." The priest once again looked at the Lightwood family.

"We love you dearly Max, and we will miss you," said Maryse as she wiped her tears away with a tissue.

"I love you Maxie," Isabelle whispered.

"I'm sorry," Clary whispered beside him so that only Jace heard her.

He reached out and took Clary's hand in his giving it a gentle squeeze. She looked up at him under her eyelashes that were lined with tears while she bit her lower lip.

'_Oh god,_' Jace thought as he felt his jeans tightening slightly. '_Get a grip! She's your sister and you are at your brother's funeral for Christ sake!_' he thought.

Jace turned his attention back to the ceremony as he saw that they were now lowering Max into the ground. The whole situation hadn't really hit him until that moment that he was losing his little brother – no, _had_ lost his little brother.

He felt an unfamiliar sensation grip his stomach and realised that it was grief. How many people could someone stand to lose in their life before it broke them? Jace had already lost his father and his mother. Now Max? It was almost too much to bear.

Jace, unable to stand there and watched turned around and walked off away from the crowd. He felt a pair of eyes on him and he knew without knowing how that the person was going to follow him, and he didn't mind that. He craved to feel of her touch, the comfort of her words. He felt that he could be himself around her and that she wouldn't mind because she was herself, she was _real_ when she was around him. She wasn't the strong, tough girl that she played around everyone else.

He walked over to a nearby tree and rested his left hand on it as he bent over slightly breathing heavily. He felt the stinging behind his eyes and knew that he was holding back tears that were stubbornly finding their way into his eyes.

"Jace?"

He felt a soft hand on his shoulder gently tugging him to try and get him to turn towards her.

"Go away," he said shortly.

He knew that he sounded harsh to his own ears, and the fact that he directed to the person behind him hurt him more than he could say.

"No."

Jace turned, seeing Clary standing below him on a tree root to try and give her that extra height.

"I mean it Clary, go away." He said.

"I'm not leaving you Jace. You need me."

She wasn't wrong. He needed her in more ways than one. He needed her physically and emotionally. He wanted to hold her close. He wanted to kiss her, and be in bed with her –

Jace quickly pulled himself away from those thoughts and instead focused them back on her.

"Please." He begged.

Behind him, Clary sucked in her breath and he couldn't blame her. Jace _never_ said please to anyone.

"I can't Jace. Just… Let me be there for you, as you were for me several times."

Jace felt himself crumbling. Clary took all his strength away from him and he had nothing left to hold himself up. Jace gasped for breath as he felt the tears he was holding back spill over and roll down his cheeks. He tried his best to try and stay silent by the shaking of his shoulders must have shown Clary the torment that he was feeling for as in the next second she had her tiny arms wrapping around his shoulders.

"Shh, Jace, it will be ok." She cooed him as she ran her hand through his golden locks and wiped some of the tears away from his eyes.

Jace turned unable to hold himself away from her any longer and buried his face in the crook of her neck. The hands that were running up and down Jace's back were sending pleasant shivers down his back and he was unable to hold back a moan of longing. Jace wasn't sure in that moment whether the moan was for the longing of wanting her, or the longing for happiness. Jace hadn't been happy in so _long_. Jace blinked and looked up so that he met Clary's unflinching eyes. Her eyes were glowing with emotion and if Jace wasn't mistaken… desire. She wanted him as much as he wanted her. It was written all over her face.

Tentatively, Jace reached out to cup her cheeks carefully so he was cradling her face. He was going to see how far she was going to let him go, and how much she wanted him. He stepped forward making her step backwards. He kept doing this until she was pressed up against the tree. Clary's breathing was ragged and shallow. Her eyes were a light with something Jace had never seen before. He had seen pain, fear and uncertainty in her eyes before, but he was not use to seeing happiness, desire and… excitement.

Jace bent forward so his nose ran along her neck and collar bone. If possible, Clary's breath hitched and seemed to be caught in her throat. With a flicker of his eyes to look at her face he saw that her head was angled slightly to the side while her eyes were closed and her mouth slightly ajar. Jace took these as all good signs.

"You should probably, tell me not to do this," Jace whispered against her skin gently kissing the underside of her jaw.

Clary shivered and fisted her hands in the jacket of his suit. She didn't say anything as Jace's mouth moved lower kissing along her collar bone and shoulders.

"Tell me to stop, if you want me to," he breathed kissing up her neck.

"Or now," he murmured against her ear as he took her earlobe between his teeth and gently bit it and tugged on it drawing out a moan from Clary. He grinned with victory, as he treated her carefully, wanting to kiss her and pleasure her, while at the same time not scaring her away. Jace knew that this is the closest that she had even been to a male willingly, so Jace felt as if he was treading around on broken glass.

"Tell me," He breathed as he kissed along her cheek and to the corner of her mouth. "If you want me to stop… just say so baby," He whispered leaning back just enough to look at her eyes for permission.

Clary's cheeks were flushed and her breathing was very irregular as she looped her arms around Jace's neck and brought him down to her lips.

Jace couldn't hold back a groan as she pressed her tiny frame against his rock hard one. He wrapped his arms around her waist and held her against him. Her skin was so warm and soft against his that Jace felt he was truly going to hell for this. One of Jace's hands on their own accord found their way tangled in her fiery red hair as he released it from the clip and held her close with his other hand on her hip. Jace could feel Clary shaking beneath him, so he took it slow. He kept his lips closed against hers so he was surprised when Clary made the next step and ran her tongue along his lower lip, asking him for permission.

Jace moaned as he let Clary in feeling her in his mouth. She was obviously letting him take the lead as she wasn't sure what to do now, so Jace gently massaged her tongue with his making her moan and quiver below him.

Jace slowed the kiss and slowly pulled back to look at her.

Clary pulled back as well and after a few moments she opened her eyes to look at him and give him a shy smile.

"That was…" She trailed off unable to think of the right words.

"Absolutely amazing," Jace finished for her, making her blush even more.

They were silent for several moments until he broke it.

"Come on, we better go back, I have to sing remember?" He teased taking her hand and leading her out of the trees.

"Jace… W-What do we do now… I mean, we can't be together can we…? Being siblings and all. Oh god, what would every one say if they find out? And my dad, he would be so furious… and Jonathan would be disgusted with me…" she broke off caught up by the fear.

Jace pulled them both to a holt and gripped her gently by her upper arms, shaking her gently until she focused on him.

"Hey, look at me. Everything will be fine. No one has to know. It can be our secret, and I will protect you, now and forever, I promise," Jace said not once looking away from her terrified eyes.

After several seconds Clary sighed and closed her eyes, leaning against Jace and hugging him around his waist. "I believe you, Jace." She breathed.

Jace hugged her to him for a few more minutes before pulling her back to the civilization and let her go so he could make his way up to the stage that had been set up.

He gripped the microphone in front of him and spoke into it.

"Hey, sorry I was gone, I just needed a few minutes to myself…" he broke off looking at Clary as she gave him a small smile. The rest of the crowd nodded knowingly, thinking that the grief was too much for him – which was slightly true.

"Ok, well um, this song I wrote for Max… So, I hope you like it Maxie," He added quietly.

He turned and picked up the electric guitar that was behind him and hung it around his shoulder, adjusting it until it was just right for him.

He nodded at the band members behind him which he had practised the song with in the past week. The drummer tapped his drum sticks together four times so then the band started together.

Then, Jace started to sing, but before he did he closed his eyes, letting the lyrics of the song take him over.

_Hey there now, where'd you go  
You left me here so unexpected  
You changed my life, I hope you know  
cause now I'm lost, So unprotected_

_In a blink of an eye  
I never got to say goodbye_

_Like a shooting star  
Flyin' across the room  
So fast so far  
You were gone too soon  
You're part of me And I'll never be  
The same here without you  
You were gone too soon_

_You were always there and like shining light  
on my darkest days you were there to guide me  
Oh I miss you now, I wish you could see  
Just how much your memory  
Will always mean to me_

_In a blink of an eye  
I never got to say goodbye_

_Like a shooting star  
Flyin' across the room  
So fast so far  
You were gone too soon  
You're part of me, And I'll never be  
The same here without you  
You were gone too soon_

_Shine on! Shine on!  
To a better place  
Shine on! Shine on!  
Will never be the same_

_Like a shooting star  
Flyin' across the room  
So fast so far  
You were gone too soon  
You're part of me  
And I'll never be  
The same here without you  
You were gone too soon_

_Shine on! Shine on!  
You were gone too soon  
Shine on! Shine on!  
You were gone too soon  
Shine on! Shine on!  
You were gone too soon_

After several moments Jace opened his eyes, immediately finding Clary in his line of sight. He saw that she had tears glistening on her cheeks but she wore a hypnotised smile. Jace smiled back at her despite the ache in his chest.

* * *

Clary had gone to school the day after the funeral but Jace, and the other Lightwood's took the rest of the week off. Despite being lonely and on edge for the rest of the week, Clary was excited. Jace was coming over to her house after school because Valentine and Jonathan wouldn't be home. That would give them the whole afternoon to talk about what happened at funeral. Clary was sitting on the couch when suddenly there was a knock at the door. Smiling Clary got up and opened the door. she had a grin plastered on her face and she expected to see Jace, but all she saw was a blur. Her mouth dropped open, not sure in what she wanted to say, but ended up screaming as she was pushed up against the wall and held her as the door closed softly behind the person. The persons hand clamped over her mouth stifling her scream as they leaned down to whisper in her ear.

"Calm down Red, it's just me. I didn't know my presence could make you scream like that," The voice that she loved said cockily.

Clary breathed as she tried to catch her breath back and get it to a regular pace again. "You're a dick."

Jace chuckled but let her go, placing his hands on her hips. "Mmm, baby, I have one. Wanna test it out?" He winked at her.

Clary scoffed and pushed him off him, and he let her. "Jace, what we did was wrong and can never happen again." She said flatly turning away from him.

Before Clary could turn away Jace snaked out and grabbed her wrist lightly bringing her back to him. "You don't mean that do you?"

Clary bit her lip and glanced away. "It's the way it has to be Jace."

She looked up as Jace let go of her wrist to find him looking at her with a hurtful expression. For several seconds both of them said nothing until Jace spoke.

"It-It's not because you're afraid of me is it Clary? Because you know I could never hurt you." he said sincerely.

"I-I know Jace, but we-we're siblings, we – we can't…"

"We could. No one has to know…"

"Jace…" Clary whispered.

"You love me don't you?" Jace asked sounding slightly desperate now as he pulled her towards him again and put his hands on her hips.

"I – well, I can't – I mean, I couldn't-" Clary stuttered.

"What's wrong?" Jace asked concerned, brushing his knuckles against her cheek lightly.

"I can't love. It will hurt," She whimpered into his chest.

"No, it won't Clary. Not everyone in life hurts you." Jace soothed running his hands up and down her back.

"I know. But we still can't Jace. It-It's forbidden."

Jace smirked. "If it's forbidden that you're worried about. You could… _forbid_ me to do things." He suggested with a wink.

The thought of his words both excited and disgusted Clary. Shaking her head she pushed him off her just as there was a knock at the door.

Jace frowned. "Were you expecting someone?"

Clary shared his frown, shaking her head. "No, not a soul. It could be Magnus though I suppose…" She said weakly as she made her way to the door.

"Do you want me to? In case it is someone else?" Jace asked.

Clary smiled kindly at him. "It's fine Jace. You don't need to worry." She soothed but the forming knot in her stomach suggested otherwise.

"Ok," Jace sighed, but despite his defeat he still followed her to the door.

Clary shook her head at him as she unlocked the door and opened it. who she saw on the other side made her hand slip on the door almost making her fall forward as her legs went numb.

"_Mum?!_" Clary asked in disbelief.

Jocelyn Fray, Luke Garroway, and another woman stood with them on the front porch. Her mother looked at Clary as if she was star struck and lost all abilities to talk. After an awkward throat clearance from Luke her mother snapped back to life.

"_Clary…_" she breathed stepping forward to embrace her daughter after ten long years. However Clary moved backwards and stumbled into Jace who wrapped his arms around her protectively.

"_What_ are you doing here?" Clary asked bewildered.

"We need to talk Clary." Jocelyn said taking a step forward, but Clary gripped the door, stopping her from entering.

"You don't call, you didn't write, you _never_ visited in a time when I needed you the _most_. So you better have a bloody good reason for wanting to talk to me now." Clary snarled.

Jocelyn nodded. "I understand that when I left I probably hurt you-" Jocelyn started but was cut off by Clary.

"No mum, you didn't hurt me. You let me get hurt. You left me unprotected and vulnerable to being hurt. Why didn't you take me with you all those years ago? You probably think I was too young to remember. But I remember _everything_. So why did you leave?" Clary snapped.

"I didn't want to leave, or to leave you Clary. But I was unhappy, and I didn't have a choice-"

"You always had a choice!"

"I wanted to come back so you can move away with me!" Jocelyn yelled back. Everyone else just stood there watching the two women, too terrified to interrupt.

"_You want me to what?!"_ Clary demanded as she started to shake.

"I want you to move back to Brooklyn with me."

* * *

Alec Lightwood sat on the park bench of Central Park watching as numerous kids ran past him screaming and playing with one another. Others were swinging on swings, and there were some that were just walking through. Alec had been looking at the ground being lost in thought when he felt someone sit beside him.

"Why didn't you call me back?"

Alec looked up to find the most breath-taking man he had ever seen. Magnus Bane sat next to him. His cat green eyes focused on him as he eyed Alec from head to foot.

"You look like shit," He added as he appraised the boy.

Alec huffed. "Well, not everyone can look as sexy as you all the time. And also, my brother just died. Give me a break," He snapped, not meaning to sound so harsh.

Magnus was silent for several moments. "I'm sorry," he said eventually.

Something in his tone made Alec look up to meet his eyes. "For what?"

"For… everything." Magnus huffed with a shrug of his shoulders. "I'm sorry for your brother, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you, and I'm just… sorry."

Alec looked at the man with amazement. No one had ever said they were sorry to him ever, and no one had ever insisted on him calling them back. "Don't be," He croaked.

Magnus reached out to tentatively grip his hand. He softly ran his thumb over Alec's knuckles and ran his fingers up and down Alec's arm, making him shudder.

"But I am." He whispered.

Alec bit his lower lip as he focused his gaze on their joined hands as he spoke. "I didn't call back because I was afraid."

Magnus drew in a deep breath. "Afraid of what?"

"Of loving. Of being in love. Of being with someone of the same sex. Of being judged. Of being despised. Of being hated. But most of all, being rejected."

Magnus reached out and gripped Alec's chin bringing it up to his face so he could meet Alec's eyes unflinching. "I could never reject you Alexander. And as for the rest, I will be there for you. Your family and friends won't care. They will still love you for who you are."

Alec grimaced. "You don't know my dad then. He thinks that all homosexuals are abnormal and should be sent to hell. If he ever found out that I was gay he would kick me out of home and probably never talk to me again." Alec explained bitterly.

"Well isn't it good that I live on my own in my apartment?" Magnus mused. Alec just looked at him. "But you don't have to tell them now of course. We can do that together when you are ready."

Alec beamed. "You mean it?" He asked trying to keep the hope out of his voice.

"I promise." Magnus confirmed slipping his hands up onto Alec cheeks and bringing his face towards his.

Alec's breath caught as Magnus brushed his lips against his own. Alec reached out to grip Magnus's shoulders bringing him closer towards him. Magnus lifted Alec so that he was lying across Magnus's lap so he could deepen the kiss and push his tongue into Alec's mouth.

Alec felt the moan in his throat more than what he heard it and fisted his hands in Magnus's glittery gelled hair.

Slowly they pulled back and Magnus rested his forehead against Alec's, both of them breathing heavily.

"What do you say Alexander? Be mine?" Magnus asked breathlessly.

Alec chuckled. "I was already yours." He said simply.

* * *

**Ok… What do you think? You got an exclusive look at Clace and Malec… both a hot makeout sesh haha ;P and I'm thinking of putting Sizzy together in this story, but I dont know how it will play out because Simon isnt friends with Clary at the moment... let me know if you think I should!**

**Do me a favour and review? I will love you forever ;P and if I am feeling nice and you review I may start to deal out sneak peeks tofthe next chapter ;D**

**Question of the day:**** What was it that attracted you to read my story and what do you like the most about it? :)**

**~Until next time lovelies xoxo**


	8. Chapter 8 - Lies, Greed and Misery

Chapter 7 – Lies, Greed and Misery.

* * *

Playlist:

Don't wanna go home – Jason Derulo **(scene 1 – Jace, Clary, and Jocelyn)**

I Wanna – All American Rejects **(Scene 2 – Jace and Clary)**

Part Of Me – Katy Perry (chorus) **(scene 3 – Clary, Valentine and Jonathan)**

Freaking Me Out – Simple Plan **(scene 4 – Clary and Simon)**

* * *

**First: I must apologise for the seriously long update. I don't normally take as long as this to update so I hope you all stay with me through the waits and that I don't lose you all along the way… **

**Second: A shout out to my girl ****BlackHairAndBlueEyesPrincess**** without her I don't know what I would be doing here today :)**

* * *

"_I want you to move back to Brooklyn with me."_

Clary stared gaping at her mother. Was she serious? After seven years she finally wanted to step up and act like a real mother to Clary? Well, Clary wasn't going to have any of it.

"I won't mum. I can't."

Jocelyn stood staring at her daughter with a slight glare in her gaze.

"You want to stay _here_?!" Jocelyn asked flabbergasted.

"Yes, my brother is here and I want to stay here with him." Clary said strongly, squeezing Jace's arm that were still wrapped around her torso.

"Jonathan?" Jocelyn asked confused.

"No, Jace. He makes me happy."

Jocelyn opened her mouth, intent on saying something when the woman behind her piped up.

"Jace isn't your brother." She said with plain confusion.

Clary's mouth dropped open and her eyes went wide. Jace's arms tightened around her.

"How do you know that?" Jace asked snippily glaring at the woman.

"Because you are Celine's son."

Jace rolled his eyes. "Yes, but Valentine is my father."

The woman frowned. "Who told you that?"

"Jonathan did. My half-brother, and Clary's brother."

The woman was shaking her head long before Jace finished talking. "No, you are Stephen's son. I can see it all through you. Your face, your eyes, your hair… You're a spitting image of him."

Jace tightened his hold on Clary even more as he looked at the woman. "I'm sorry, but who are you?" he asked.

"Don't be sorry," Said the woman. "My name is Amatis Herondale. I was the wife of Stephen."

Jace's mouth dropped open and his eyes flew wide at the shared last name. "Wait, _was_ Stephen's wife?"

Amatis nodded sombrely. "I didn't know that while I was married to him, Stephen was seeing Celine behind my back, and after she fell pregnant with you, Stephen left me to go support her.

"They died in that house fire of course which Stephen got you out of before he tried to go back in the house for Celine. He absolutely adored you Jace. You were always his little boy and always will be.

"He had put down on your birth certificate that Michael Wayland was to be your Godfather because they were best friends and so you were sent to live with him.

"It is true that Celine did have an affair with Valentine Morgenstern but he wasn't your father. Stephen was because he told me just before he left me. But of course you found out the truth of Stephen being you're father so you adopted his last name up until you were sixteen which you then took on the Lightwood's name legally."

The whole time Jace had been standing there just looking at Amatis with his mouth hanging open. "Is that true?" He gasped after several seconds.

Amatis frowned. "Why would I lie to you? Jonathan would lie so he could hurt the two of you, but I have no reason to lie to you."

Jace's gaze travelled from Amatis to Clary who was still standing in his arms. She looked up at him and she had a slight smile on her face, but it wasn't as big as what his grin was.

"You're not my sister!" He rejoiced.

Clary pretended to be hurt. "You don't want to be related to me, Jace? Oh I am hurt!" she giggled.

Jace smiled even wider if that was even possible. "No, because if we were related, I wouldn't be able to do this…" He said before turning Clary around and pressing his lips firmly against hers.

Clary's breath caught and she could tell Jace was putting a lot of his built up emotions into the kiss as he wrapped his arms around her, one of his hands finding its way into her hair and tangling amongst the curly red locks.

Jace pressed his lips even harder against Clary's forcing hers to part. Now having access he was able to slip his tongue in her mouth, massaging her tongue with his own.

Clary couldn't breathe. She couldn't move and she sure as hell couldn't think. She knew that they should break apart as they had company in front of them, but Clary couldn't bring herself to care.

An awkward cough sounded behind Clary and that seemed to wake Jace up. He slowly stopped the kiss and pulled away from Clary, looking in her eyes as he did so before he focused his attention on the people behind her.

"You thought she was your sister and you loved her?! That's sick!" Jocelyn exclaimed and made out to grab Clary and pull her away from Jace.

Amatis quickly intervened. "But they aren't related Jocelyn. So it isn't that wrong."

"But if you look at the morals behind it!" She cried still upset.

"Oh and your morals and actions have been the greatest?!" Clary fired back.

Jocelyn paused and looked at her. "That's different."

"Oh please. Do tell me how it is. How is abandoning your own daughter for _7 years_ worse than someone loving another that they thought were related to them. Incest has happened before." Clary said defending Jace's honour. Jace realising what she was doing squeezed her reassuringly to tell her that he wasn't offended.

"Yeah, and other kids parents leave them to Clary. _It has happened before_," she said mimicking Clary. "Grow up Clary. The world doesn't revolve around you."

Clary blinked and drew back further into Jace's embrace. Jace was glaring at Jocelyn and Clary looked as if one more hurtful word from Jocelyn and she would break down and cry.

"How dare you-" Jace started before Clary cut him off, her anger boiling over.

"How can you say that? You barely know me! You were gone for _seven years_ of my life! You don't know the sort of pain or stuff that I have gone through!"

Jocelyn scoffed. "We've all gone through puberty Clary. I'm just glad I wasn't there when you had your little hissy fits. See this is the sort of melodrama that I was talking about."

Clary started to shake in Jace's hold and he started to grow worried for her well-being. He also could predict what she was going to do next and tried to stop her. "Clary, Don't-"

But it was too late. Clary had reefed off her hoodie and stood there exposing her bruised and cut arms to Jocelyn, Luke and Amatis. They all gasped in synchronisation.

"This is what happens when you aren't around mum. Dad and Jonathan get angry over the littlest things and they take it out on me. Do you have any idea how many scars I have? Both physically and emotionally? I'm just so thankful that Jace has been here. Because unlike you he cares about me and tries to protect me. But that isn't even the worst of what they do…" She said finishing in a whisper.

It took several seconds for Jocelyn to visibly shake herself back to her senses. "They _abuse_ you?!" she asked clearly shocked.

Clary unable to answer only nodded. All the fight had left her, leaving her feel empty and weak in Jace's hold.

"I thought… I thought that was there was only the one time when he slapped me… I didn't think he would actually do that…" Jocelyn mumbled to herself.

"Well, he does mum."

"Is that the only kind of abuse that he does to you Clary?" Luke asked finally speaking. He had a husky and gruff kind of voice. The glasses that he wore kept slipping down the bridge of his nose so he would impatiently push them back up.

Clary's silence spoke legions to them all. There was no explanation needed for them to know that Valentine and Jonathan both have raped her.

"Now I definitely need you to move with me," Jocelyn said stepping forward and gripping Clary's arm and pulling her forward so that she came out of Jace's embrace.

"Mum! God, let go! I told you I don't want to go! I want to stay here with Jace!" Clary yelled fighting against her mother.

Jace watched with a worried frown. He was concerned that if Clary worked herself up too badly then she would have a fit or a panic attack – and that was the last thing any of them needed.

"Jocelyn, let her go," he said lowly but firmly.

Jocelyn paused and looked over at Jace with a scowl on her face. "That's Mrs Garroway to you." She spat.

Clary paused and looked at her mother stunned. "Garroway? What happened to Fray?"

"I married Luke if that wasn't obvious already. Now let's go." She said and tugged Clary more out the door.

Clary planted her feet. "Mother! I'm not going!" She shouted. When it was obvious that her mother wasn't listening Clary turned around to Jace. "Jace!"

The sound of desperation in Clary's voice snapped Jace into action as he wrapped his arms around Clary's waist and pulled her into his chest ignoring Jocelyn's instant tugging.

"She said she wants to stay here Joce- err, I mean Mrs Garroway." Jace said sternly.

Jocelyn stopped and looked at Clary shocked. "You want to stay here with your abusive father and brother just because you want to be with Jace?" She asked stunned.

Clary glared at her mother. "Yes. Unlike you, I care about others and how they would feel if I left."

Jace stared at Clary. She was only hanging around and putting up with her abusive father and brother because she didn't want to hurt him? Jace felt his heart break a little inside. The lengths that this girl would go to for him…

"Clary-" he breathed, but was unsure of what he wanted to say.

Very subtly Clary elbowed him and he took that as his cue to shut up.

"Just leave mum. You're not welcome here and I don't particularly want to see you or talk to you anymore. Amatis, it was lovely to meet you, and I'm grateful you told Jace and me the truth." She said.

"Clary-"

But before her mother could say anything Clary slammed the door shut in her mother's face and slumped against it once it was closed. She slid to the ground and brought her knees up towards her chest and rested her arms over them and then she put her head on her arms.

Jace after a few seconds cautiously walked over and knelt beside her, resting a gentle hand on her back. Softly he began to rub her back in a soothing gesture and when Clary peeked up at him, Jace saw that she had a few tears on her cheeks.

"I didn't want to see her. I didn't want her to find out about dad," she choked out as a few more tears slipped down her cheeks.

"Shh, I know," Jace comforted and slipped his arms beneath her so he could scoop her up into his arms.

Clary looked up startled when she felt the ground beneath her disappear to find Jace carrying her towards her bedroom.

Instead of freaking out like she normally would she just relaxed into his arms and rested her head against his shoulder as Jace pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. Clary closed her eyes in contentment.

* * *

Jace carried her up the stairs and into her room and placed her gently on her bed after kicking the door shut with his foot. Clary looked up at her from underneath her lashes and Jace had to swallow heavily.

"Will you stay with me Jace?" She asked quietly turning onto her side so that she could face him to where he was sitting on her bed.

Jace smiled and reached out to push a stray red curl behind her ear. "Of course I will stay."

Clary smiled and settled down into the bed to where she closed her eyes. If Jace didn't know any better he could have mistaken her for being asleep she looked so peaceful.

Jace continued to stroke her hair and caress her face softly. After a few seconds Clary opened her eyes and Jace had to say what was on his mind. The guilt inside was killing him.

"Clary… did you mean what you said to your mother downstairs?" He asked.

Clary bit her lip and avoided looking at Jace. "About what part?" She asked. Both Jace and her knew what he was talking about.

"How you were staying here because you didn't want to leave me?"

Now Clary sat up and faced Jace. "It's not just you Jace – it mostly is – but it is also Magnus, and Izzy and Alec… I can't just leave you guys." She said blinking rapidly.

"Clary…" he breathed and leaned forward.

Clary looked up to see Jace leaning in towards her and she reacted on instinct.

Jace's breath was caught in his throat as he reached out and cupped the side of Clary's face with his hand and she leaned into his touch. He could even put into words with how glad he was to know that they weren't related. The idea of being her brother and being completely in love with her like he was made him feel sick to his stomach.

Jace took one last shaky breath before he closed his eyes and his lips pressed firmly against Clary's. The air was sucked out of the room as they lost themselves in one another.

This kiss felt different from the one they shared last week in the cemetery. That kiss had been fierce and demanding, whereas this kiss was needy and gentle. After all they had been through they needed the reassurance from this kiss. But it wasn't just the current problems that they needed comfort from, it was also what laid in both their pasts. Clary's abuse, her mother leaving and her losing a close friend. For Jace it had been the abuse from Michael, The death of his parents and Max's death. All the incidences had taken a toll on both of them and they came undone together in that one kiss.

Jace raised himself up so that he was hovering above her and trailed kisses down from her jaw down her neck and down to just above her chest. Above him Clary was breathing heavily and her right hand was fisted tightly in his blonde curls.

"Jace," Clary panted and started pulling Jace back up towards her.

Jace followed eagerly where he swallowed her gasps of pleasure into his own mouth while he swiped his tongue back and forward over her bottom lip.

Clary shivered beneath him and started to tug Jace's leather Jacket off his shoulders. It wasn't until she started to tug his t-shirt up that he froze – realising what she wanted to do.

Jace pulled himself away from her – as hard as that was – and pressed his forehead against hers.

"Clary… No…" He gasped.

Clary stopped and looked up at him with wide green eyes.

"W-What?" She stuttered her hands still on the waist of Jace's jeans.

"We can't do that Clary," he whispered peppering kisses to the edge of her temple.

"W-Why? Don't you w-want me?" Clary asked out of breath still.

Jace pulled back with surprise. "Of course I want you Clary. God, there is nothing I want more, but we're not ready yet. _I'm_ not ready." He explained.

Clary started to pull back slightly to sit up against the head board of her bed.

"Oh god," She whispered putting a hand to her mouth to cover it.

"Hey, hey it's alright, come here," Jace said pulling her into his lap as he took her place against the head board.

"Jace, I'm so sorry," she said burying her face into Jace's chest.

"Shh, don't be sorry," he cooed rubbing her back with soothing hands.

In his hold – Clary started to shake from fright, and he didn't blame her in the least. It must have been hard for her, to go from not being able to have anyone touching her, to being all over Jace and wanting nothing but for him to touch her and her not even being able to recognise what she wanted and what she didn't had to be tough on anybody.

"But I am," She breathed looking up at him from under her eyelashes. Jace saw that her eyes were slightly damp with tears and her eyelashes were wet with them making her look so innocent and vulnerable.

Jace groaned. He couldn't help it. "Clary, _please_," he begged. On top of all the emotions and shit she had going on for herself, guilt was the last thing he needed her to worry about.

"No Jace, that wasn't fair on you, to get you all… excited… and then to just leave you hanging…" She said and then paused before she added; "I'm a cock teaser."

Jace choked on laughter. Despite the situation he could still find humour in it. "No Clary you're not. Don't ever think that please. I know that you aren't ready for… it… hell, even _I'm_ not ready for it." He said.

This time Jace got his desired effect – she laughed. "Jace Lightwood – the womanizer – isn't _ready_ to get intimate with a female?" Clary faked gasped and put a hand over her chest.

Jace gave her a sly grin in return. "No, I'm more than ready for sex, I just don't think I'm ready for _you_ yet," he explained.

Clary laughed again and opened her mouth to give him another retort when suddenly a bang from downstairs distracted both of them.

In his arms Clary froze for only what seemed like two seconds before she was in motion pulling away from him and tugging him up off of her bed.

Behind Clary's closed door, he could hear the sound of thunderous footsteps coming up the stairs and he couldn't help but look at Clary fearfully. The fear he felt wasn't for him so much, but for _her_.

In the meantime Clary had taken his hand and started pulling him towards her window where she then slid it open.

"Jace, you have to get out. You have to leave now," She said fearfully giving him a slight shove to the open window.

Jace planted his feet and put his hands on either side of the window's frame stopping him from moving. "Wait, I can't leave you here. We both know what's going to happen if I do," He said.

Clary shook her head and a few tears slipped down her cheeks. "You have to Jace, my dad can't see you or he'll hurt you," She whispered as the footsteps grew louder. "So please Jace, just leave."

Jace shook his head back at her. "And if I leave he'll hurt you," he pointed out.

Clary started trembling. "He'll hurt me anyway. He always does."

"But he wouldn't have to if you let me protect you Clary."

Clary grimaced and looked at him with sad eyes. "You do protect me Jace. You give me a reason to fight back."

Jace could have sworn his heart had just stopped beating. Never before had any girl he had been with express so much need for him and how much they _relied_ on him.

Still looking at him with sorrow in her eyes she pushed him towards the window and this time – he went. When he had one leg out the window Jace looked back and quickly grabbed a hold of Clary and brought her towards him.

Her mouth dropped open in surprise before Jace covered it with his own. He felt her gasp of shock more than what he heard it but as much as Jace hated it, the kiss was fleeting, He couldn't linger around.

Just as the footsteps got to Clary's door Jace threw himself out the window and just managed to hang onto the ledge of the window as he dropped out of it.

Silently without making a sound so no one knew he was there, he watched in on the scene unfolding before him.

* * *

Clary watched Jace climb out of her bedroom window and turned back towards her bedroom door just as it flew open.

She gave a tiny yelp as Jonathan and Valentine both stalked in the room. Before she could even move Jonathan was striding towards her and gripped her arm tightly as he brought her towards their father.

"Clarissa, I heard hushed voices in here. Who else is here?" Valentine asked with his arms crossed over his chest to show dominance.

Clary gulped back her fear before she addressed her father. "No one else is here. I was on the phone."

Valentine narrowed his eyes at her. "Jonathan, check her bathroom and in her wardrobe," he barked.

Jonathan let her go as he moved towards Clary's bathroom first.

"But no one is here!" Clary yelled at her father.

She realised her mistake as soon as she did it.

Valentine's hand struck out and hit Clary across the cheek with a blinding force, making her lose her balance and fall to the ground.

"You dare speak to me like that!" Valentine roared and landed a kick in Clary's side for good measure.

Jonathan came back over to them after searching her wardrobe. "There's no one here father," he reported loyally.

Valentine turned his black eyes onto Clary. "Who were you talking to on the phone then? And why could I hear the second voice?" He demanded.

"I was talking to mum, and it was on speaker so I didn't have to hold the phone." Clary said taking a step backwards.

Valentine who was stalking towards her paused. "Your mother called you?" For a moment he seemed completely astounded.

Silently, Clary nodded.

"What did she want?" Valentine asked.

Clary bit her lip. She wasn't sure what she wanted to tell him yet. Before she could even speak Valentine had grabbed the front of her shirt and lifted her up in the air so that she was at his eye level and so that he was slightly strangling her.

"_What did she want?!_" he repeated.

"She wanted me to move back to Brooklyn with her," Clary gasped out before she even think about it.

Valentine dropped Clary suddenly with surprise as Jonathan looked quickly at Valentine.

"You said no didn't you?" Valentine demanded.

Clary quickly nodded. "Of course."

"Good. At least you used your thick head for once and did something right," Valentine spat as he kicked Clary again.

Clary gasped as pain shot up her side but she was snapped out of it when her father's fist landed on the side of her right cheek. Clary lay on the floor, panting for breath. She was in too much pain and she was too tired to fight. All she wanted to do was sleep…

The pain continued as Valentine laid hit after hit and kick after kick on her and soon Jonathan came over and joined in on the fun.

Her head started to feel lighter and she was barely conscious of her father's hands on her pulling her t-shirt off and her jeans.

The punch that Valentine had just given her was stronger than what she thought as she started to lose consciousness. And she was thankful for that. If she passed out now, the she wouldn't have to be awake as Jonathan and Valentine raped her and did what they wished to her…

Clary blinked slowly and looked towards the window that Jace had disappeared through. When she blinked again she saw the most peculiar thing that she was sure she was dreaming.

A man was climbing back through the window from outside and landed on her bedroom floor with a heavy thud.

Valentine who was so startled to the sudden noise paused in the act of ridding Clary's clothes from her body.

"What the-"

"Get your _fucking_ hands off her before I snap your neck." the boy threatened darkly as he walked towards Valentine and Jonathan.

"You're Wayland." Valentine stated.

The corner of the man's mouth lifted up in a half smirk. "No, I'm a Lightwood," he said before he brought his fist forward and punched Valentine right in the centre of his face.

Valentine shocked by the sudden pain stumbled back and tripped over his own feet, but as Clary watched in fascinating, the man was like an angel that had descended from the heavens as her guardian angel she mused as she watched him face off with Jonathan.

Jonathan sent a punch out to the boy's which he skilfully dodged but was unable to avoid Jonathan's foot as he knocked the boy's feet from underneath him, sending him to the ground.

Jonathan quickly jumped on top of him and straddled him as he pinned the boy's arms beneath his knees so that the boy was completely immobilized.

Jonathan punched the boy in the eye and he shouted out with pain which would have made Clary wince had she not been so exhausted.

The boy bucked into the air and for a moment Clary thought that he had been hurt, but then she realised that he was throwing Jonathan off of him as he swiftly jumped to his feet and spun in a circle bringing his foot up as he did and dropped a roundhouse kick to Jonathan's left temple – knocking him out cold.

Clary blinked slowly again, her eyelids feeling even heavier now than what they did before. Clary watched as the boy faced off with Valentine.

There wasn't much of a height difference between the two men, but Valentine was noticeably taller than the other boy.

The boy didn't wait for Valentine to make the first move. Instead he sprang at Valentine pushing him into the wall as he did. Valentine groaned with the impact and the boy pressed his advantage. He punched Valentine in his left eye as he grabbed a fist full of Valentine's hair and banged his head hard against the plaster wall of Clary's bedroom.

Valentine dropped to the floor like an autumn leaf falls to the ground as the boy turned and faced Clary. When his eyes set on her his eyes widened with fear.

He hurried over to her and gently lifted her head with one hand while he rested his other hand lightly against her left cheek.

"Clary? Can you hear me?" He asked worriedly.

Clary who was too tired and wasn't aware of anything around her reacted off adrenaline.

She flinched back away from his touch. "Please don't. Don't hurt me please." She begged softly.

"Clary? Clary. It's me, Jace, you're going to be fine," he soothed as he tried to slip his arms underneath her to pick her up.

But Clary completely freaked.

She started to kick and scream with wild terror. "NO! DON'T TOUCH ME PLEASE!" She wailed.

"It's ok Clary! I'm going to take you to my house where it is safe!"

Clary threw her head from side to side shaking it with a petrified desperation. "NO! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"It's going to be alright Clary!" The man yelled over Clary's screams. But it was then that Clary started screaming for Jace.

"JACE! JACE! HELP ME PLEASE, JACE! HE GOING TO KILL ME! JACE!"

A few tears slip down the mans cheeks as he set her back on the ground. "I'm so sorry Clary. I never wanted to do this," the man whispered as he put a hand on Clary's shoulder and started to squeeze it hard.

Clary screamed again. She wasn't sure whether it was from pain or terror. Or both.

The last thing she saw before her vision was clouded with darkness was a pair of worried golden eyes…

* * *

"She has some internal bleeding on her side, and she has a minor concussion."

Voices floated towards Clary but she kept her eyes closed. She was too exhausted and just couldn't find the energy to do anything except lay in the really warm and comfortable bed that she was in.

Wait, warm and comfortable….?

Clary gripped the blanket that was over her in her fists and felt that it was a thick, fluffy doona. The bed was soft beneath her not like her bed, and yet it was still softer than what Simon's bed had been.

"Will she be ok though?" Asked the second voice. This one was male and worried.

"She will be when she wakes up, though she should be careful and not be moved around too fast."

There was silence before Clary heard footsteps walking across the floor and a door opened and then closed. Several seconds later, there was a new weight on the edge of the bed making it sink further. Another beat passed and then Clary felt careful fingers brushing hair back from her forehead.

"Clary? If you can hear me, can you please open your eyes? I need to know that you're ok."

Clary suddenly realised that the male's voice was Jace, and he was sitting beside her stroking her hair away from her face.

She blinked rapidly and slowly opened her eyes, seeing Jace was the first thing that her eyes set sight on.

"Clary!" Jace cried leaning forward. "How do you feel?"

Clary slowly stretched her limbs out feeling some of them ache more than others. "Sore," she said her voice sounding hoarse.

Jace gave a chuckle that held no humour in it. "Yeah. I should have been there to protect you sooner. Instead of sitting outside the window just watching… it wasn't until he started… I just lost it when he started… I couldn't sit by and watch him and your psychotic brother…" Jace said unable to finish his sentences and gave a shudder.

Clary reached out and laid her hand lightly over his. "It's ok Jace. I've told you before. You don't have to feel obligated to me." She whispered.

Jace looked at her for a second before he reached over and got a glass of water off the bedside table beside them. He offered it out to Clary for her throat and she took it gratefully.

"But I want to feel obligated to you. I want to be-" Jace suddenly broke off and Clary looked at him with a slight frown as she set her glass down carefully on the table.

"Want to be what Jace?"

Jace looked down at the doona draped over her and started playing with a loose threat of material. After several seconds he took a deep breath before he looked back up at her, meeting her gaze.

"I want to be your boyfriend. I want to be the one you can count on. I want to be there for you even when you feel like you have no one. I want to hold your hand and kiss you in public to show the world that you are the girl I love. I want to be with you and not feel guilty the way I have been since the day I met you. I want to protect you, and just _be_ there for you, even if you don't want me to be." He said in one big rush.

Clary's mouth was gaping open at Jace as she stared at him in shock. During his whole speech only one thing had gotten through to her. 'You _love_ me?" She whispered.

Jace jumped up off the bed and threw his hands in the air. "Jesus!"

Clary flinched thinking that she had said the wrong thing and that he was now mad at her. She opened her mouth to apologise but before she could Jace had turned back towards her and brought his mouth down on hers.

Clary went rigid beneath his touch. Jace slowly brought a hand up to her cheek and touched her with the barest touches of his fingertips as if he was afraid she would shatter and disappear from beneath him. After a few seconds Clary loosened up and brought her hands up to his hair and brought him down so he was closer to her. Jace held himself over her but Clary needed him closer. So, so much closer…

She bit his lip and Jace's mouth opened beneath her own and soon his tongue was in her mouth exploring hungrily.

A knock on the door suddenly broke them apart and Jace pulled back sighing with frustration. He stood up and Clary watched him biting her lower lip as she openly checked out his backside.

Jace opened the door and closer the door over so Clary couldn't see who he was talking to though she could hear them talking in hushed whispers. She heard Jace sigh and then he was looking back over at her.

"Clare, you have a visitor if you want to see them." Jace said.

Clary thinking it might be Isabelle smiled and nodded. "Yeah send her in."

Jace frowned before he opened the door to reveal Simon. Clary couldn't help the startled gasp that escaped her lips.

"Come on Fray. You've known me long enough now to know that I'm not a chick," Simon joked stepping in the room.

Clary was speechless. She just sat there in her bed staring at Simon like he was a stranger. In fact, he _was_ a stranger to her now.

"You're not going to say anything?" Simon asked in a quiet voice.

"I don't know what to say," Clary said honestly.

"'ll just give you guys a minute." Jace muttered then excused himself out of the room, the door closing softly behind him.

"What are you doing here Si?" Clary asked softly.

Simon sighed and made a sad face at his nickname. "I'm here to apologise. The way I treated you was unforgivable and not right. I didn't know what I was saying and there is nothing I regret more than being as harsh as I was with you that day. I shouldn't have kissed you, and I shouldn't have said the things I did." Simon said in one big breath.

Clary took a deep breath. "Then why did you?"

"I was jealous," Simon said simply. "The girl I thought I was in love with was paying more attention to someone else other than me, and it drove me mad that it was the new kid – Jace – the womanizer. I didn't like to see you with him because I could see him breaking your heart, and also, well I couldn't imagine you with anyone other than myself."

"But Jace is good for me Si. He makes me happy."

Simon nodded. "I can see that now and I am glad. Really, I am. I don't love you anymore – not the way I thought I did, but I still do love you like a sister, and I realise now that you are nothing but my little sister. I realise now that if we had of dated it probably would have been awkward. And well I-" Simon broke off with a sudden panicked face that he may have said too much.

"You what Si?" Clary probed.

Simon sighed and then looked back at Clary. "Well, I kinda, sort of like Izzy," he said.

Clary started to smile before she started giggling un-controllably.

"What's so funny?" demanded Simon with a smile of his own.

"You, Simon Lewis, the biggest nerd and geek I know, has fallen for the charms of beautiful and popular Isabelle Lightwood. You said you would never fall for a popular girl because they are so bitchy and full of drama."

Simon grinned. "Yeah, but Izzy is different. She isn't like the other girls like Kaelie and Aline, she just hangs around with them."

Clary smiled at Simon a moment longer before her expression went more affectionate. "You should chase her Si. I think that if you show your interest and prove yourself to her, she just might surprise you."

Simon smiled before he looked over her face and his smile disappeared. Slowly he reached out and carefully traced a bruise over her chin.

"God I am so glad Jace got you out of there," He whispered.

Clary stayed silent and just looked at him while she swallowed heavily.

"He did what I didn't have the guts to do…" Simon continued to mumble.

"Si… what happened to dad and Jonathan?" She asked quietly.

Simon looked up and met her eyes. What she saw there was a love for her and affection that he had always had for her, but now was a different type entirely.

"Well… Jace beat your brother and dad up and knocked them out. Then he said that when he tried to get you out of there you freaked out on him and wouldn't let him touch you. He said that the only way he could get you to go with him was to… put you to sleep."

Clary suddenly remembered the painful grip on her shoulder that she thought was her father and she gasped. "Jace knocked me out?!" She screeched with terror.

Simon laid a hand of his over hers and calmed her down. "He didn't do it the same way. With your dad and brother, he beat them until they passed out. But with you, he squeezed the pressure point in your shoulder and he felt so bad while doing it. When he came back here, he looked absolutely shattered and had tears on his cheeks. He kept whispering to you over and over how sorry he was, even though you couldn't hear him. Then his mother – Maryse – who is a nurse said to put you down and she started to treat your injuries. Jace called the police once he was sure you were in safe hands and at the moment your brother and father are locked up. There will be a trial for them in two weeks."

Clary had begun to cry during Simon's speech and looked up at him through a blurry vision. "Jace cried?" She whispered.

Simon nodded. "He really cares about you Clare-bear." Simon whispered back.

Clary started to shake so Simon folded her in his arms holding her in his tight embrace. "What do I do Si? I'm so scared."

"Trust us Clare," He breathed holding her tight. "We are all here for you and we all want to protect you, especially Jace. He looked so _destroyed_ when he brought you here. And I know in my heart that he will fight for you Clare, for anything. We all will, and I will too… if you forgive me." He said looking down at her with a hopeful expression.

Clary smiled and hugged him tighter. "I forgive you."

* * *

**Ok, so I am really sorry for the massively long wait on this update and I was starting to fall asleep when I wrote the end of this chapter, so I hope it doesn't suck… But hopefully this chapter makes you all forgive me as Clary has forgiven Simon. And I tried to write it extra longer than the previous chapter to make it up to you guys because I love you.**

**Question of the day:**** If you could be transported into one of your favourite books series, what would it be and why and what character in the series would you want to be?**

**REVIEW! :)**

**~Until next time my lovelies xoxo **


	9. Chapter 9 - Battle Scars

Chapter 8 - Battle Scars

* * *

**Ok, so I know I have been MIA for AGES but to put it simply I have been on an emotional rollercoaster and felt the lowest of lows . . . And if it wasn't for my best friend ****BlackHairAndBlueEyedPrincess**** and the song ****'Breath' by Breaking Benjamin ****I probably would have lost it by now and wouldn't be here to give you this new chapter. So thank you all for being so patient but a ****MASSIVE**** thank you to my girl ****BlackHairAndBlueEyedPrincess. ****You literally saved my life . . .**

**Because I can . . . I am going to post the lyrics to 'Breath' because I feel the song needs recognition for what it has done for me. So, if you don't want to read my rambling just skip to the story ****:)**

**BlackHairAndBlueEyedPrincess**** I know you will read this ;)**

_I see nothing in your eyes  
__And the more I see, the less I like  
__Is it over yet? In my head  
__know nothing of your kind  
__And I won't reveal your evil mind  
I__s it over yet? I can't win_

_So sacrifice yourself  
__And let me have what's left  
__I know that I can find  
__A fire in your eyes  
__I'm going all the way  
__Get away, Please . . . _

_You take the breath right out of me  
__You left a hole where my heart should be  
__You got to fight just to make it through  
_'_Cause I will be the death of you . . ._

_This will be all over soon  
__Pour the salt into the open wound  
__Is it over yet? Let me in . . . _

_So sacrifice yourself  
__And let me have what's left  
__I know that I can find  
__A fire in your eyes  
__I'm going all the way  
__Get away, Please . . . _

_You take the breath right out of me  
__You left a hole where my heart should be  
__You got to fight just to make it through  
_'_Cause I will be the death of you . . . _

_I'm waiting  
__I'm praying  
__Realize  
__Start hating . . . _

_You take the breath right out of me  
__You left a hole where my heart should be  
__You got to fight just to make it through  
_'_Cause I will be the death of you . . ._

* * *

Playlist:

Battle Scars - Guy Sebastian **(scene 1 - Simon and Clary)**

Diary Of Jane - Breaking Benjamin **(scene 2 - Simon and Isabelle)**

Addicted - Simple Plan **(Scene 3 - Jace and Clary)**

Waking The Demon - Bullet For My Valentine **(Scene 4 - Jonathan and Valentine)**

* * *

Clary and Simon were laying on the bed with her head resting on his chest and his arm snaking around her waist to hold her close, for what seemed like hours - but in fact was only twenty minutes.

Simon eventually sighed and pulled away from her while he swung his legs over the bed and stood up. Clary watched him in confusion.

"What are you doing?" She asked attempting to sit up but the sharp pain in her side made her fall back down.

"I need to go see the others," Simon said running a hand through his hair.

"About what?" Clary asked determined not to let him leave yet.

Simon dropped his hand and turned to smirk at Clary. "You don't want me to leave do you Fray?" he asked effectively avoiding the question.

Clary blushed and looked away. "So what if I want to spend some time with my best friend?"

"What about Jace?" Simon asked. "I was going to get him for you."

"But I want to spend some time with you. He doesn't get me like you do," She said earnestly.

"And he doesn't get you either?" Simon raised an eyebrow sceptically.

"He gets me in other ways," Clary stated.

Simon made a face and then groaned. "I _don't _need to know Fray," he said.

Clary frowned before her eyes widened with understanding at what he was implying. "Ugh! No Simon! Not like _that_," she said blushing furiously.

Simon laughed and ducked to avoid the pillow that she aimed at his head. "Oh I'm sure. The womanizer Jace Lightwood, hasn't got into your pants yet?" Simon said his voice heavy with sarcasm.

"You know I'm not completely comfortable with that sort of contact yet," She mumbled mostly to herself.

But she knew deep down, that she wanted that. She _needed_ that from Jace in a closure type of way. To show to her that she can be loved, and have sex with another person and that it won't be painful, but can be filled with love and lust. The image that her father and brother had given her of sex had completely ruined her view on sex in life. She had never experienced slow and sensual. She had only felt rough and demanding. How was she to trust someone so easily with her body in such an intimate way and trust that they wouldn't hurt her? Clary was used to being hurt in life. She was scared. Yes she was hesitant and nervous to give herself over to Jace like that. Sure she wasn't a virgin technically, but she sure felt like one. The nerves and the excitement and the unsureness of doing the act were frightening to her. She felt inexperienced and sloppy like she won't know what to do. And she _wouldn't _know what to do when the time comes . . .

Simon waved his hand in front of her face shooting her worried glances. "You alright there Fray? You kind of zoned out on me there."

Clary blinked and looked up at him. "Yeah . . . Yeah I'm fine. I was just thinking."

"'Bout what?" Simon asked picking at his fingernail, but when he didn't get a reply from Clary he looked up to find her blushing. "You know what? I don't want to know," He teased.

That only made her blush even redder.

"Si, do you think you can get Jace for me? I know you just came in and wanted to talk to me and that, but I just need Jace right now," she said apologetically.

"Hey," Simon said making her look at him. "I just want you to get better, so if Jace is what you want I will get him for you. Don't feel guilty or feel like you're hurting my feelings ok?" he said.

Clary bit her lower lip unsure but nodded.

"Ok, well I'll go now," he said bending over to kiss her gently on the top of her head. "I love you Fray."

"I love you too Si," she said with a faint-hearted smile.

Simon threw her another smile over his shoulder as he exited the room leaving Clary all by herself.

* * *

Simon closed the door softly behind him and leaned against it closing his eyes and releasing a breath.

When he opened his eyes he was slightly surprised to find Jace standing in front of him with his arms crossed over his chest.

"How is she?" He asked stepping forward.

Simon grimaced. He knew that Clary was putting on a good face and that more than once he caught the sight of tears brimming her eyes. He knew that she was hurting inside, but because she was Clary she would never admit that to anyone. But Simon knowing her for so many years saw straight through her, and he knew that Jace would too.

"She's alive, that's the main thing," he said trying to look at the positive.

Jace's shoulder's dropped and so did his head. When Simon looked he saw that Jace had his eyes closed.

"Jace . . . She'll be fine. She's going to be ok," Simon said stepping forward to lay a comforting hand on Jace's shoulder.

"I know, I - I just wish she didn't have to go through all this and feel any pain at all, you know?" Jace said looking up and Simon saw the unshed tears lying in the bottoms of Jace's eyes.

"Yeah, I know," I said sorrowfully.

Jace nodded and then looked at the door that would lead him through to see Clary. Remembering what Clary had asked of him he gestured to the door and stepped to the side while Jace looked at him.

"She was asking for you," Simon said.

Jace nodded his head and then within ten seconds he had disappeared through the door, closing it softly behind him.

Simon stood there for a few seconds before setting off down the hall. He planned to go into the lounge room where he was attempting to show Alec how to play COD, but when he passed a single door he stopped. He walked over to the door and laid his head against the wood, listening to the quiet sobbing coming from within. He knew who that was immediately. Not just because she was the only one seeming to be missing from the household, but because he would recognize that voice from anywhere. It was like he was in tune to her and he already felt like a part of him was joined to her . . . And that scared the crap out of him. Knowing that he was already falling for this girl when they had only had a few conversations made his head reel. That wasn't really possible was it? But then again he would sometimes wonder if that was how Clary felt about Jace. Like she had no choice in the matter the same way he did now.

He took a deep breath and then reached out and rapped lightly on the door twice.

He heard the sound of sniffing and then feet shuffling along the floor until the door then opened.

He stepped back as Isabelle stood in front of him wearing training pants and a tank top. She wasn't wearing any makeup and her eyes were bloodshot from the crying. But Simon couldn't help but think he hadn't see her looking so beautiful in her life. Seeing her in her natural form without hiding was a rare sight and one he cherished.

"Uh, hey," He greeted stupidly. He suddenly felt self-conscious being found standing outside her door.

"Hey," she relied but she wasn't looking directly at him. She was glancing at the floor trying to hide the fact that she had been crying from him, even though he already knew.

Simon suddenly had the need to look into her beautiful blue eyes. So that's what he did. He stepped forward closer towards her. He placed one hand on her waist and the other under her chin and brought her face up to his until he could see into her eyes.

"Are you ok?" He asked looking from one of her eyes to the other.

Isabelle shuddered and nodded. "Yeah."

"Isabelle Lightwood. Don't even try lying to me," he commanded and her eyes widened slightly at the authority his voice held.

"I - I just . . . It's nothing really," She stuttered trying to get out of it.

Simon shook his head and wrapped his arms around her, bringing her against his chest. "Isabelle . . ." He groaned.

"What do you want me to say Simon?" She snapped.

Simon smiled. Finally, a reaction. "I want you to say what's on your mind."

Isabelle sighed. "My little brother was on my mind . . . Alright?"

Simon frowned. "Your little brother? Max?"

Isabelle flinched but nodded.

Simon looked at her thoughtfully. He never knew Max, nor did he ever meet him, but he did know he was a very important little boy. He was a loved sibling and son, an no doubt made the huge mansion they were in seem . . . Empty.

"You got your vengeance. His killer is behind bars," Simon attempted to sooth and smile.

His comment only seemed to make Isabelle cry more. "That's partly why I'm crying. Because I am so glad that . . . That . . . _fucker_. . . Is behind bars. I hope he rots in there," she spat cruelly.

Simon nodded knowing that she needed to feel this anger to help her move on. "What's the other reason?" He asked.

Isabelle looked up from where she had been glaring at the floor and blinked. "What?"

"You said that was only part of the reason."

Isabelle grimaced and went back to staring at the floor. "The other reason is well . . . Because he is gone. I'll never be able to spend time with him or make up lost time with him ever again. I was never the best sister to him. I always ignored him, or refused to take him somewhere, or read on of his comic books with him like he wanted too. I never did that and neither did Alec, it was always Jace. Jace was always the one that was there for Max, and that is why Max looked up to Jace all the time. Because Jace was the only one to be there for him. If I could take it back . . . If I could take it all back and do things over again . . . I would make the time. I would spend time with him and make the effort. I wouldn't focus my life on my phone, or my friends or beauty. I would look at the small things we take for granted like our family and treasure it while I can, because in the long run, that is what is going to hurt the most. Losing the ones who you love. Because once they are gone . . . You can never get them back. . ." She breathed.

Simon's arms tightened around her as he hugged her to his chest. "You're right. You're absolutely right," he murmured.

Isabelle looked up at him. There was something in his voice that sounded different and made her look up. But when she did, Simon crashed his lips to hers.

Isabelle's eyes flew wide. Never in her life had she ever been kissed by a nerdy geek with glasses like Simon, but as she stood there, in the circle of his arms, she realises she didn't want to be kissing anybody else.

Isabelle closed her and linked her arms around Simon's neck, letting herself feel this, and savour the feeling of being wrapped up in Simon's arms.

As he ran his tongue along her lower lip and she opened up to him, she couldn't contain the moan of longing that slid out of her, as Simon's hands moved down her body to her thighs and pushed her up. Isabelle wrapped her legs around his waist as they still continued to kiss as he carried them in to her room, kicking the door closed and making their way over to her bed where he laid her down carefully as if he was afraid he would hurt her.

As they laid on her bed, tangling their limbs together and pressing against one other with a need beyond both of their control . . . All thoughts of Max left her mind, and she knew that Simon's worry for his best friend was temporally gone as they linked hands and fit together like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle and spent the rest of the night engrossed and being preoccupied with one another.

* * *

Clary laid in the bed as the feeling of being alone slowly crept over her once more. She knew she was being stupid - Simon had just left and in any second Jace was going to come through the door to hold her securely in his arms. Clary sat up in the bed and as the minutes ticked over and she began to fidget. She was starting to feel edgy and she knew she needed Jace. Needed him to breath - which she wasn't doing at the moment. She was hyperventilating. She knew she needed to calm down and take a deep breath but no matter how hard she tried - she couldn't do it. Clary recognised the feeling of anxiety seeping into her and she knew in a few minutes she would be panicking . . . All because no one was in the room with her, and no one was there with her.

Clary threw back the covers on the bed with trembling hands. The need now was too great, and she had no control over it. She couldn't help the thoughts, or the desperate pleads for help that she knew nobody could hear because they were all running through her mind.

Despite the pain that she could barely feel she stumbled across the room to another door. When she opened it she nearly cried in relief. It was a bathroom - a room she knew she could find what she needed.

She crossed the smooth tiled floor, not paying any attention to the expensive Jacuzzi nor the massive shower, she just reached for the bathroom cabinet that had mirrors as the doors on the front.

She pulled on the handles, opening the doors and found what she was looking for. The cabinet was stocked with all the necessity items that one would need. Soap, body wash, shampoo, conditioner, a brush, toothbrushes, Band-Aids, a first aid kit - but none of that was what caught her eye. It was the packet of refillable razor heads that had yet to be opened and used.

And boy, would she put them to good use.

She quickly ripped open the packet and all the razor heads dropped down into the sink below her. She picked up one of them and then set to work breaking it apart, pulling one of the blades away from the head itself and letting the others drop into the sink with the other discarded mess.

As Clary held the blade in her hand she sank to the floor, sitting so she wouldn't fall over later and render herself unconscious again. Without any more hesitations she slid the blade across the skin of her wrist and the affects were instantaneous.

Clary's head feel back as her eyes closed and her mouth opened in a silent sigh of gratitude. The quick sting of the razor wiped all thoughts from her head and the blissful feeling of release that followed had the same effects of being high.

She smiled as she looked down at her wrist to see the blood spilling over her arm making a stark contrast with her pale skin. She grinned again, wider this time as the feeling numbed and slowly retreated, so again she brought the blade down across her skin making another cut just above the one she had just made but slightly deeper than the last.

This time she did sigh with contentment. This blade and the high it gave her was all she ever needed in her life now. The stress that she was feeling and the anxiety and the sadness and pain were now gone. Her arm was starting to feel like it was on fire, as the sting of the cut came back making her body feel warm, and she shivered in delight. Yes, this was all she needed now and forever.

Clary had just leaned against the wall of the Jacuzzi behind her and closed her eyes feeling very tired when there was a knock on the door.

"Clary?"

Clary smiled and giggled quietly feeling giddy. "Come in," she said.

The door creaked open and the first thing she saw was a mass of golden curls. There was a gasp as the door opened wider, and when Clary took in the appearance of the person she realized it was Jace.

"Oh, hi ya Jace," she giggled.

Jace's face was horrified as he took in her broken and bleeding form on the floor. All he could think of was remembering seeing her lying on the floor right before he had saved her from her father.

'_Not again'_ he thought desperately as he fell to his knees beside her and lifted her small frame into his arms.

"Clary? Can you focus on what I'm saying?" He asked.

Clary scoffed. "Of course I can Jace, I'm not drunk."

"No, because we all know what that looks like," he muttered remembering when he ended up at the bar she no longer worked at.

"Why Clary?" He asked not even bothering to hide the pain in his voice.

"I - I don't really have a good excuse or reason Jace. I - I just had too. . ." she murmured as he laid her back on the bed.

"Stay here and don't move. I'll be right back," Jace instructed.

Clary rolled her eyes and ignored the fear bubbling inside of her at the thought of him leaving. "Yes mother," she said sarcastically.

Jace glared at her, but then ran into the bathroom they had just come out of but now carrying the first aid kit she saw earlier.

"Hold out your arm," He crooned softly.

Wordlessly, she did as she was told, and allowed him to apply the antiseptic, making her wince slightly before he put a bandage around the cuts and placed a tender kiss to her wrist.

He dropped the first aid kit to the floor and then crawled onto the bed with her and wrapped his arms tightly around her.

"Why did you do it Clary? What were you feeling?" Jace begged.

Clary shivered and hid her face into Jace's chest. "Simon . . . He left and I was in the room alone. I couldn't help but feel like I was back at my house. . . All alone and I was always terrified to be alone, I waited for you, but after a few minutes you still weren't here and I began to panic. So I did the only thing I knew how to do. Numb to feeling. It was what I always did at home. Whenever dad or Jonathan were finished with . . . Whatever they did, I would always pull myself into the shower and make the water as hot as I could stand which would make my skin become all red and sometimes blister. It was there that I cut myself. I always kept a razor in my shower so I wouldn't have to worry about cleaning up the mess of the blood . . . Afterwards, and the shower always helped too, making me feel . . . Not so dirty . . . I don't know how to explain it Jace, and I don't even know if you are understanding a word of what I am trying to say, but basically, cutting is my release, it is my way of getting away. I did try suicide twice, but each time Simon and Magnus were there to stop me. So eventually I just gave up on trying to kill myself. Instead I would just cut myself to the point of where I would pass out from blood loss, just so I could sleep peacefully without the nightmares."

When she looked up at Jace she saw tears on his beautiful face. With shaking hands she wiped the tears away.

"Don't cry Jace."

Jace shook his head and grabbed her hand in his and held it against his heart so she could feel the rapid beating of it.

"Clary . . . I never want to see you like that again, or hear you talk like that again. The idea of you committing suicide . . . I can't even put into words the pain it brings to my heart. It makes my chest physically ache at the thought of losing you. I'm addicted to you Clary - I'm in love with you. I am here for you. I want you to rely on me and count on me. I want you to rob me of my strength if that means getting you through the day. I just never _ever_ want to see you hurt ever again. It hurts too much. So promise me Clary." he whispered against her lips.

Clary feeling tears of her own fall down her cheeks from his beautiful words nodded. "Ok Jace. I - I promise." She whispered.

"Thank you," he breathed before applying full pressure against her lips.

Clary closed her eyes and knotted her fists in his hair pulling him closer. Jace was careful to not put his full weight on her because of her injuries, but Clary was hard to deny with her insistent tugging.

"Please Jace. Come closer . . . I need you so much closer," she whimpered.

Jace groaned. "Fuck it," he muttered as he crushed his lips back to hers and slowly lowered himself onto her.

Her warmth immediately surrounded him, filling him and completing him so he was powerless to stop the moan that worked its way out of his throat.

As he kissed her he could feel her grinding against him, making that delicious friction between them make it that more unbearable.

Jace quickly pulled away and put his lips up beside her ear to whisper to her.

'You better stop that, otherwise I may not be able to stop."

Clary's breath caught and Jace grinned inwards knowing that he made her feel like that. Then the words that tumbled out of her shocked him to his core.

"Who said I want you to stop? I'm ready Jace. I - I love you," she breathed the last three words against his mouth.

Jace froze. He knew how hard it was for Clary to say those words and mean them. It was the first time she had actually said them to him before. He had told her several times that he loved her but this was the first time for her, and he knew she had to be feeling terrified. Her trembling told him as much.

Jace grinned as a single tear fell down his cheek. "I love you too Clary. I love you so much baby," he breathed kissing her more forcibly.

His hands trailed down her sides to the hem of her shirt and he slowly pushed it up and over her head, growling slightly when their lips broke contact which made Clary giggle.

Her shy little hands then made their way to his shirt and the removed that off of his body as well. Once it was gone he fell back over her kissing her with more need and hunger than ever before. He gently traced patterns over her bruised sides and stomach as he reached the waist band of her jeans.

He pulled back slightly and looked into her eyes for permission. The slight nod of her head that she gave was enough for him to pull her jeans from her skinny and lean legs before he crawled back up to her pressing kisses against every inch of her skin.

Next to go were his jeans as Clary undid his belt and then pulled them down until she used her feet to skillfully push them down the rest of the way. Jace couldn't help but wonder where she learnt how to do that.

Jace made quick work of her bra and panties and then his boxers were gone so there were now no more barriers between them.

They just kissed and held each other for a while until the tension became too much for either of them to handle. Jace pulled back and once again met Clary's eyes.

"You sure?" He asked. He just had to be positive this was what she wanted one last time before they sealed the deal.

Clary nodded. "I'm sure," she breathed.

Jace released the breath he didn't know he had been holding as he pressed a kiss to her lips.

"Thank you," he muttered as he reached over into the bedside table and pulled out the small foiled packet and ripped it open. He slid the condom on over himself before he held himself back over Clary and positioned himself over her.

He knew that she wasn't a virgin - thanks to her father and brother - but he still wanted to make it something she would remember.

Jace laid a hand against her cheek and kissed her as he slowly drove himself into her.

Clary gasped and they both moaned in unison as the tension both left their bodies.

Jace just stayed still for several seconds just to savor the feeling of being completely sheathed inside of her, before he started to move, thrusting in and out.

With each thrust they got quicker and the kisses got hungrier as they both got closer and closer to their climax.

Just before they both hit that point of ecstasy Clary started mumbling to herself. After a while Jace realized what some of the things she was saying were. Things like 'oh god,' and his name and 'I love you' tumbled out of her mouth.

The last time Clary whispered her love for him it pushed him over that wall and they fell over it together.

His arms tightened around her as her nails dug into his back and they both collapsed onto the mattress beneath them.

Jace quickly rolled to the side so he wouldn't crush her but pulled her into his arms after he pulled the condom off and tugged the blankets over their naked forms.

Jace looked down at Clary and realized with a start that she was crying.

"Jesus . . . Clary, what's wrong?" He asked panicked.

Had he hurt her? Did she regret it? Did they move into this too fast?

But Clary just shook her head and smiled. "I'm perfect. They're happy tears," she explained laughing.

Jace sighed in relief and relaxed pressing a tender kiss to her forehead.

"I'm glad," he whispered. "I love you Clary."

"I love you too Jace," she breathed before they both feel into a well needed and peaceful sleep.

* * *

Valentine stared at his son as they sat on two different cribs in the same prison cell. He still couldn't believe that he had been thrown in here because of that rotten Wayland boy, but he didn't plan on staying in here long. He was already plotting an escape plan when footsteps could be heard approaching their jail cell, so he stood up to face who ever it was. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Jonathan do the same thing and he couldn't be prouder. He had raised his son well, and will continue to do so.

The footsteps had reached cell and Valentine gave a start.

"Blackwell. Pangborn," Valentine said.

"It's been a long time," Blackwell said.

"Indeed it has," Valentine agreed. "What are you doing here? I didn't realise you guys were cops now."

Pangborn smirked. "We're not," he whispered smiling widely at Valentine. "We still lead the ministry that you gave over too us."

Valentine's head was reeling. "Then what are you too doing down here?" He asked not following.

Blackwell chuckled quietly as to not to be overheard by the other guards near the doors. "We are you're knights in shining armor, sir," he smirked.

"You're what?" The incredulity of the situation was making Valentine seem very slow.

"We are getting you out of here," Blackwell said plainly.

"And," Pangborn added, "We think it is time you took back control over the ministry. How else do you expect to find that bitch of a daughter of yours?"

Valentine growled. "Oh, I know _exactly_ where she is."

Blackwell sighed contently. "Ahh, revenge is sweet," he sang before he pulled out his stolen keys and unlocked the cell.

Valentine turned to his son to find Jonathan standing readily and to attention. "Let's go get our little Clary and remind her what happens when she disobeys an order and to kill the Wayland boy."

Jonathan grinned manically. "I would love to father," he said as they stepped out of the cell.

The guards at the gate of the cells turned to the sound of scraping metal and started to pull out their guns and aimed them at Valentine and Jonathan.

"Hold it right there!" One of them cried.

Valentine sighed as Blackwell fired off his gun and the guard dropped to the ground dead. "That was too easy."

Jonathan laughed as they made their way out of the prison without fear. When you were the leaders of a mafia, you had no reason to fear for your life, Valentine mused as Blackwell and Pangborn lead them to black SUV's.

* * *

**So, that's the end of this chapter, sorry if it ended kind of ****abruptly****, but I was writing this at 1.00 in the morning to get it posted for you guys. But I hope you liked it, and don't forget to leave me reviews to cheer me up a bit ****:)**

**And to my girl BlackHairAndBlueEyedPrincess I'm sorry if this chapter made you cry for reasons known to us . . . *Love Heart***


	10. Chapter 10 - Living On The Edge

Chapter 9

Playlist:

Beneath your beautiful – Labrinth ft. Emeli sande **(Jace and Clary)**

Perfect – Simple Plan **(Alec and Magnus)**

Jailbreak – ACDC **(Valentine and Jonathan)**

You feel so lonely you could die – David Bowie **(Jace and Clary)**

* * *

Clary woke up to the feeling of arms around her and her automatically reacted of instinct. She wasn't aware of where she was or who was behind her, all she knew was she had to get away before they woke up and attacked her.

Flinging back the covers and the blankets, Clary went to leap out of bed, but the arms around her tightened and pulled her back against their chest, holding her in an unbreakable hold.

Clary's breathing sped up because she could feel she was naked and all she could think was that the person was going to come back for seconds.

She had to get away _now_.

"Let me go!" she cried as she tried to elbow the person in the face but they deflected her attempts.

"Clary – Baby . . . Calm down, it's me . . ." the person behind her spoke and slowly Clary started to settle down.

Breathing hard, Clary turned to look over her shoulder to see the boy of her dreams holding her close while looking down at her with a worried frown on his gorgeous face.

"Jace?" She breathed out in a tired pant.

This made Jace pull her tighter into his body and bury his head in the nook of her neck so he could plant a soft kiss there.

"It's me baby," he said kissing her cheek. "Are you alright?"

Slowly Clary nodded. "Yeah . . . I just didn't know where I was for a second and I got scared when I felt your arms around me because I didn't know it was yours."

Jace's arms tightened and he kissed her once again, but this time on the lips in a reassuring gesture.

"Do you want to get up?" He asked her.

Clary smiled. "And do what?"

"Get some breakfast…?" Jace said but this time unsurely.

Clary couldn't help the smile that spread across her face. "Only if Izzy isn't cooking."

Jace laughed. "No, I'll make something for you," he said pulling her out of bed.

When Clary's feet touched the cold ground her skin automatically broke out in Goosebumps. Jace handed her a robe that was hanging on the closet door handle and Clary looked at it curiously.

"Um . . . Jace . . . Unless you have something to tell me . . . Why do you have a girls robe in your closet?"

Jace sighed and chuckled to himself. "Izzy put one in there claiming that it would come in handy if I ever had a girl over . . ."

Clary looked down at the ground. "And has there been . . . Many . . .?"

She couldn't help the humiliation at herself. Of course Jace had been with numerous girls. Of course she wouldn't be the only one and she would be kidding herself if Jace was actually _in_ love with her . . .

Jace stepped forward and put a hand under her chin, bringing her face up to his.

"You're the first one to use that robe, and the only one at that."

Clary couldn't deny the pleasant shiver that crept threw her body as Jace bent to press a kiss to her forehead. But she also noticed that he conveniently dodged the main question.

How many had he been with?

Jace smiled as he looked down at her lovingly, and it was then that he saw the cuts on her wrist.

Frowning slightly, Jace gently grabbed her wrist and brought it up so he could see the cuts.

"Clary . . . Why did you do it? Please tell me," he begged looking deep into her eyes.

Clary looked down and bit her lip. "You'll hate me, and think I'm weak," she mumbled.

Jace firmly grabbed her around the waist and led her back to the bed so they were both seated with her facing him.

"I could never hate you Clare – and I think you are the strongest person I know."

Clary looked down at the covers and gripped the sheets in one of her hands.

"I did it because everything was just getting too much really. After my dad and Jonathan . . . I just felt so worthless and pathetic . . . and I just felt cheap and used and I wonder if it will be like that for the rest of my life, and then I feel worse because I think of doing things that will end the pain permanently . . . But then I feel horrible because I know what that would do to you and Izzy, and Alec . . . but sometimes I want it so, so desperately . . ."

She realised that by the time she had finished talking that she had tears streaking down her face and Jace was there wiping them away while peppering her face with sweet kisses.

After she had finished her blubbering she looked up at Jace to see him looking at her with the most loving expression on his face, though when he saw that she was looking at him, his look turned serious.

"I never want you to commit suicide, ok Clary? Losing Max was painful . . . But losing you . . . That would kill me, and I would probably join you in the afterlife if I ever lost you," he said sincerely that made more tears spring to her eyes.

"Jace . . ." She breathed.

"I know we had this talk yesterday, but I really feel like I have to show how much I really love you and what I would do for you. Clary I would do anything to keep you by my side, and no one or nothing could tear us apart, ok?" he said holding my hands against his chest and looking in my eyes.

Clary slowly nodded and kissed Jace. "I know you will, and I – I love you."

Jace's face lit up with a bright smile, but it soon sobered up. "Still having trouble to say it properly huh?" he asked.

Clary ducked her head into Jace's chest. "I'm sorry, it's just that it's the first time that I have ever said it . . . and before now I have been too terrified to say it because of my father and brother."

Jace wrapped his arms around her and began to softy stroke her hair. "It's ok, it doesn't bother me and I understand completely. But you saying it makes me unbelievably happy you have no idea."

Clary just nodded and continued to cling to Jace as if her life depended on it, but Jace seemed to feel the same way because he was doing the same thing.

After several minutes, Jace was the first one to pull away reluctantly. "Are you well enough to come downstairs? Or do you want me to bring our food up here?"

Clary was confused. "Our food?"

Jace just looked at her. "I'm not letting you eat alone up here Clary if that's what you choose – that's just sad."

Blushing furiously, Clary replied. "No, it's ok, you don't have to trouble yourself to doing that. I – I can come down."

Jace made her look up at him. "It's no trouble Clary, I we want to do this to make you as comfortable as we can. I want to."

Clary shook her head warily. "I don't know why you bother with me, I'm nothing."

Jace's eyes widened and his grip tightened slightly – but it wasn't painful. "You're _nothing_?! Are you serious? Clary . . . You are _everything_ to me. You may not see it, but you mean something to me, to Alec, to Isabelle, to Simon. Hell, you even mean something to Magnus! I never want you to say that ever again ok? You're not nothing, ok? You're _not._"

Clary grimaced and looked away. "When you spend ten years growing up with Valentine, and with Jonathan coming home every now and then, you start to believe it after a while. I know you probably think that I am just saying it for attention . . . But I truly do mean it. As Valentine used to beat me, he used to say these things over and over again as he would hit me. And after a while it would feel like he was ingraining it into me with each hit. I can't help but think that because he made me believe it otherwise I would get punished for it."

Jace just looked at her for several moments before he cupped her face and brought his lips sweetly to hers. The kiss was so gentle, but at the same time it was passionate. After several minutes Jace finally took her hand and started leading her to the bathroom.

"Go have a shower and freshen up, and then I will have a shower after you."

Clary bit her lip and looked up at him from beneath her eyelashes. Jace had to swallow heavily to stay in control.

"Why don't we have a shower together?" She asked. "Saves water that way . . ."

Jace smiled. "I would love that," he said.

Holding out her hand to him, Jace took it and they walked into the bathroom together. They had only walked a few steps inside when Clary froze.

"Clary? What's wrong?"

Clary didn't answer him so Jace turned to look where she was looking and he stiffened. In the sink there were still the left over razors from the night before. Looking at Clary she had a faraway look in her eyes with a hint of longing.

Jace let go of Clary's hand and went over to the sink. Picking up all the razors he took them back into the room and he could feel Clary watching him. He put them in the bin and made a mental note to empty the bin just so that he knew Clary wouldn't be able to go foraging for them later on.

Walking back into the bathroom he saw Clary still standing there waiting for him and Jace couldn't help but smile and admire at how beautiful she was. He knew that she had self-esteem issues because of all the scars that covered her body thanks to her father, but he found them beautiful too. He realised that they showed how brave she was to stand up against her father and they made her who she was.

Jace took her hand and led her to the shower. When the water was warm enough he turned back to Clary to see that she was giving him a shy look. Jace stepped towards her, making sure that she could see what he was doing and gave her the room to move away if she wanted to – but she didn't move as he started to undo the cord at the front of the robe she was wearing.

Pausing first to see if it was ok, Jace started to push the robe off her shoulders and let it fall to the floor. Clary dropped her arms back and wiggled her shoulders slightly so that it was able to slip off her shoulders.

Jace wrapped his arms around her waist and dropped his head, gently pressing kisses over her neck, collarbone and shoulders.

Clary gently pulled back out of Jace's embrace and he gave her a confused look but she was smiling at him.

"If we don't hurry the water will run cold," she said and stepped in the shower.

Jace chuckled but followed her inside and then closed the door. Jace watched as Clary stepped under the water as it soaked her hair and ran in trickles down her body following all the curves in its path. Jace physically had to pull his attention back so he could grab the scrunchy and lathered it up with strawberry scented body wash. The soap was Izzy's that he had 'borrowed' when he knew that Clary was going to be staying here. The whole time Clary had been watching him and eyed him seductively as he motioned with his finger to turn around.

Doing as she was told, Jace began to wash her back and then gently turned her back around by her shoulders. It was the front he knew he was going to have trouble controlling himself with. Clary was just standing there while gently biting her lower lip while looking up at him from underneath her eyelashes.

By god . . . That woman . . .

Taking a deep breath, Jace slowly started to wash her shoulders and then followed her arms down. Coming back up he quickly looked in her eyes before he started from her neck and started going down her body . . .

Jace smirked when he realised that this was going to be the best shower he has had in a _long_ time . . .

* * *

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Magnus asked Alec as they sat outside.

Alec nodded slowly but clenched his hands into nervous fists. "I can't keep putting this off Mags, I have to do it sooner rather than later."

"Or you could just do it when you are ready to," Magnus pointed out.

Alec shook his head and stood up. "No, I am ready, I'm just procrastinating."

Magnus sighed but also stood up. "Ok, well, only if you are sure."

Alec nodded. "I'm sure."

Magnus held out his hand to Alec, which he firmly grabbed a hold of. Giving his hand a tight squeeze, Magnus smiled as Alec opened the front door and entered with Magnus trailing behind him.

Walking into the lounge room, Alec saw his Mother and Father sitting on the couch. He knew that if Max was still alive, he would be sitting in front of the fire place between them with one of his manga magazines. Sighing heavily with grief, he walked into the room.

"Uh . . . Mum, Dad . . . I was wondering if I could talk to you for a second," Alec said sitting down opposite them with Magnus beside him. He was semi-glad that Magnus was no longer holding his hand, because he had no idea how his father was going to react to this.

"Sure, what's up Alexander?" Maryse said.

Alec took a deep breath before looking at Magnus. Smiling at him, Magnus gave him an encouraging smile.

"Well, for some time now, Magnus and I have been seeing each other, and he had grown to be very special to me," he said nervously.

Robert frowned and then sat forward, clasping his hands between his legs and giving Alec a stern look.

"What are you trying to say son?"

Alec took a deep breath. "Mum, Dad . . . I'm gay, and Magnus is my boyfriend."

There was several beats of silence before Robert was the one to break it. "you're gay . . .?"

Alec nodded confidently. "Yes, dad, I am."

Maryse opened her mouth to say something but before she could Robert spoke over the top of her.

"Get out."

Alec just stared at his father, so did his mother.

"What?" Alec asked with disbelief.

"I said get out. Until you get out of this phase, and grow up and finally get a pretty woman, then you will be welcome back. No son of mine is gay. Not if I can help it."

Alec was speechless. He just continued to stare at his father as if he had grown two heads.

"_Robert!_" Maryse hissed angrily.

"No Maryse, Alec cannot be gay. He will not be gay, so until he comes to his senses he is not welcome in this house. In _my_ house."

"This is my house too!" Maryse said furiously.

"But the house is under my name, therefore it is _mine_," Robert said back.

Maryse stood up angrily from the couch. "I cannot believe you!"

"I'm not leaving Dad. I live here too." Alec put in.

Robert turned his angry eyes onto Alec. "I SAID GET OUT! NOW DO IT!"

Alec stepped back flinching. Never had his dad ever raised his voice to him like that. Not even when Alec accidently broke his favourite model boat.

"What is going on in here?" came a new voice.

Alec turned to see that Jace and Clary had come down to see what all the racket was about. He observed that they both had wet hair and that both of their cheeks were slightly flushed. Alec couldn't help but feel amused at thinking about what kind of shower they would have had.

"Nothing, Jace. I'm just gonna go," Alec muttered and headed for the door with Magnus in tow.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Go where?" Jace asked standing in front of Alec and blocking his exit.

"I'm going to be staying with Mags for a while. Dad doesn't want me here anymore," Alec said and this time he couldn't keep the sadness out of his voice.

"Wait, what? Why?"

Alec sighed. "Because I told them I am gay."

Jace's eyes widened.

"And dad told me I have to go until I 'grow up' and 'get out of my phase'."

"But it's not a phase!" Jace yelled.

Alec grimaced and shrugged. "Try telling dad that."

Jace spun on his heels furiously and faced Robert.

"How could you do that?! He hasn't done anything! It's your own stupid head that you have to get past, not his!"

"Jace –" Maryse warned.

"No Mum, Dad can't do that! We have already lost a brother, and I will be damned if I lose another one!" he yelled making everyone flinch at the mention of Max.

"Jace!"

"Well it's true! If we don't support Alec, then he won't want to come see us because of Dad! He won't feel comfortable and he will feel as if he would be walking around on eggshells all the time, not to mention, not feeling as if he wouldn't fit in anymore because dad has pretty mum exiled him from our family!" Jace ranted.

"It's fine Jace, I'll just stay with Magnus for a while." Alec said quietly.

"No Alec, it is not fine and you are not leaving!"

Alec looked over at Robert and he was surprised to see Robert with a sad and hurt expression – not the kind of look he thought his father would have right now.

Alec sighed and turned back to the door just as his name was called again.

"Alec! Wait."

At first, Alec thought it was Jace, being hell bent on making him stay, but when he turned around he was surprised to find that Robert was walking towards him just before he enveloped Alec in a massive hug.

"Alec . . . My son . . . I am so sorry for what I said. It was wrong and I didn't mean any of it. I'm just glad that Jace was here to set me straight. He is right. I may not like the fact that you are gay, but you can't change who you are son, and if this young, sparkly man beside you, is the one that you love, then congratulations Alec."

Alec was stunned.

"T-Thanks . . ." he said. He was so confused. Was it a trick and his father was going to kick him out later, or was he going to wait for him and Alec to break up if they ever do, and then kick him out? Because he would have nowhere to go? The thought made a cold shiver run down his spine.

"You really mean it?" Alec asked unable to help himself.

Robert smiled. "I really mean it son. I am happy for you."

Slowly, Alec felt a grin creep across his face as he turned to Magnus.

Magnus was standing there, and he was smiling and grinning at Alec as well, but he was caught by surprised when Alec suddenly pulled Magnus onto him and kissed him deeply. Not giving a crap that his parents were there watching.

Alec had finally found his life, and he was eager to start it with his new boyfriend.

* * *

Valentine stood at the head of the long dining room table with all his men seated around it – including Jonathan.

"Alright men, what do we know?" Valentine asked planting his hands on the table and leaded forward on them.

"I was walking past your house, and I saw your wife there with that guy Luke, and your daughter was asked to move in with her mother because she told them about you disciplining your daughter."

Valentine's hands clenched his hands into fists. "Well that can't happen because I have grand plans for my daughter now that I have taken my place back in the industry. Do you know when she will be moving?"

Only shaking heads answered his question. Valentine sighed with frustration.

"Sir . . . I heard she was living with the Lightwoods and that they wanted to adopt her as their legal daughter."

"THEY WHAT!"

All of the men were too terrified to answer him so they all remained silent.

"Jonathan!"

Jonathan stood to attention. "Yes father?"

"Let's go. We have a little girl to pick up and take home," Valentine said with a sinister smile.

"What's the plan?" Jonathan asked as they marched out of the building.

"We pick her up, and if she struggles we are to sedate her, and we will take her to the warehouse, so we can teach her a lesson for putting us behind bars the little bitch. We will show her what she gets for trying to pull shit like that again."

* * *

Clary stood beside Jace holding his hand as they watched both Magnus and Alec leave through the front door.

Clary had known that Alec was gay of course and she also knew that his parents hadn't known yet, so she could have only guessed that the confession would have been tense.

Which she had been proven right just a few seconds ago.

But because Clary had grown up with an angry and abusive father she could tell the Robert wasn't really angry at Alec for being gay – he was just so stressed and still grieving his other son's death. So when Alec came out and said he was gay, in a way it could feel like he was losing another child, even though he wasn't. And again she was proven right when Robert broke down and apologised.

Beside her Jace blew out a strained breath and looked down at Clary. Giving her a tight smile, she could see that Jace was both concerned and stressed. She had known that Jace had been worried about his parents when Alec would tell them.

"Let's go out," Jace said turning and started to lead Clary out the room but Maryse spoke from behind them.

"Um, actually Jace, I need to talk to Clary for a moment if she doesn't mind."

Jace looked down at her and she nodded.

"Ok," he said slowly and turned back to Maryse.

"Can you wait for her outside? We need to talk to her about something personal."

Jace opened his mouth to argue but then sighed and turned back to Clary.

"I will just be out in the hall," he said and then kissed her forehead.

Clary nodded and then watched him leave before turning to Maryse.

Maryse was also watching Jace and she waited for Jace to leave the room before she addressed Clary.

"I think you should have a seat Clary," she said kindly.

Slowly Clary walked forward and sat down hesitantly.

"Ok . . . so as you know Clary, you will be living here and will be under our care until we can legally adopt you and that the paper work comes through . . ."

Clary butted in. "You're adopting me?"

Maryse smiled a small smile. "Well yes, we have taken a liking to you and after your father . . ." Clary flinched. "We decided that we wanted you, besides, it was Jace's idea."

"It was?"

Maryse nodded.

Clary was happy to be a part of a kind family like the Lightwoods, but at the same time she felt like a bit of an intruder. She felt as if they were just replacing a child with another one, but the reasonable part of Clary's mind argued that it wasn't true and that they really wanted to do this for her so that she can have a happy and safe home for the first time in ten years.

But then there was the fact of her and Jace. What would all the kids at school say when they find out that they are dating, but in the name of the law, are brother and sister? They would be disgusted and they would be shunned. Especially Jace, and she couldn't have that, but at the same time she couldn't break up with him – because that would kill her worse than what being his 'sister' would.

They had already been down that path, and they had gotten through it, so they would be able to get through this too, she thought. Also knowing that she actually wasn't his real sister helped the situation as well.

"Clary?"

Maryse was in front of her waving her hand in front of her face. Blinking Clary leaned back and looked up at Maryse.

Seeing that she was back to the present, Maryse moved away. "Are you alright?"

Clary nodded. "Yeah, sorry. I just got lost in my own head for a second there."

Maryse smiled. "I could tell, don't worry, Jace used to do that all the time the first time he came here, but he wasn't as bad as you . . . I was seconds away from shaking you," Maryse gave a nervous laugh.

Clary blushed feeling embarrassed. Maryse probably thought she was insane now. "Sorry."

Maryse smiled again. "It's ok sweetie, but there is something else that Robert and I have to tell you . . ."

Clary swallowed feeling that she wasn't going to like this piece of news.

"What is it?"

Maryse licked her lips. "We got a call from the prison that your father and brother were at this morning."

Clary gripped the chair with her hands. "And?"

"They have escaped," Maryse said bluntly.

Clary's mouth dropped open and the world faded from her eyes. All she could see and hear was the sound of her father's and her brother's voice taunting her as they tortured her and hurt her. The things they would say and write into her arms and thighs . . .

Of course Jail wouldn't be able to hold them. She should have known that. When Valentine wanted something then he got it, whether or not he had to hurt people in the process to get it.

Clary also remembered her mother saying about a gang that he used to be a part of and that he was their leader. This mob was feared in any town that they lived in because they would be able to kill or kidnap anyone they wanted without having the police getting involved. Because they were so sly, sometimes no one ever noticed that a person was missing and would never be returning.

And Clary knew that her father was coming back for her.

She was his loving daughter after all. But she had also told people about the abuse she suffered, and she feared for the Lightwoods safety as well. Not only did Clary tell them everything – or well Jace did – Jace also witnessed Valentine in the act and that is why she was going to go to trial next week. But now there wasn't going to be one, because how could you accuse the criminal when you didn't have one?

Clary came back to the present when she felt cold water hitting her face.

Blinking she saw Jace kneeling beside her gently rubbing her thigh and back, while Maryse held an empty cup which she presumed had water in it, and Robert was hovering around at the back with a concerned look on her face.

"Clary? Talk to me, what's going on?" Jace begged stepping in front of her.

It was then that Clary realised that she was hyperventilating.

"Shh . . . baby, breathe . . . deep breathe in . . . long breathe out . . ." Jace said calmly as he held her hands in his.

Clary did as he said, and they breathed for about five minutes, until she was finally breathing normally again.

"Now what happened?" he asked softly but shot Maryse and Robert an accusing look.

"H-He's coming for m-me Jace," she whispered grasping onto him.

"Who is baby?" Jace asked as he smoothed hair away from her face.

"My d-dad."

Jace's eyes blazed. "No, he can't baby. He is locked up in prison with your brother."

"N-No they aren't anymore . . . they escaped." She breathed.

Jace flew to his feet and faced Maryse and Robert.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It doesn't concern you," Maryse said.

"Bullshit it doesn't! I was going to testify at the trail! Because I was there! And now her psychotic father is coming after her? I'm sorry if I want to protect my girlfriend!"

"Jace . . ."

"NO! You know how I felt about her, and how I feel about her father. I pulled her out of her own house while she was unconscious for Christ sake! And you wanted to keep me in the dark? Fuck that."

"Jace! What your mouth!"

Clary was starting to shake in her seat. All this yelling was reminding her of being at home and it was becoming too much . . . Just _way_ too much . . .

Standing abruptly, Clary made a bee-line for the door.

"Clary? Where are you going?" Jace asked ignoring his parents for a moment.

"I-I need to get out. Don't follow me," she said hurriedly before she ran.

"Clary!"

But Clary didn't hang around to wait for Jace, she just needed to go to a place where no one could chase her and never hurt her again.

She needed to end it all.

She jumped down the front steps and ran past Alec and Magnus who were sitting in one another's arms on the porch swing.

"Clary?" Magnus asked.

Never had he ever seen Clary so upset, except for the one time when Simon was telling him about how he found Clary in the park . . .

"Clary!" He called again but Clary couldn't stop.

Her head was racing and her head was pounding. This time she could tell that cutting wouldn't help. She had only felt like this – so out of control – only once before. And the only way to fix it and escape it was to end it.

It started to rain as Clary ran to the spot where she could do it without planning. She didn't need any ropes, or any pills, all she needed was a ledge, and she knew where she could find it.

As she ran she lost the ability to hear. She couldn't hear the sound of the wind whistling in her ears, and her body was just numb so she couldn't feel too, so she couldn't feel the cold rain pelting her in the face.

As she ran towards the park she saw the swing set. And she saw the space in between the two swings where she had tried her first attempt, but had been stopped.

This time . . . this time no one was going to be able to stop her.

No one was following her.

No one would be able to catch her.

It will be just all her, and the jaggered edges or the cliff face.

Ahead, Clary could see her destination. And it was only just before she got near the edge that Clary began to hear the sound of the water.

She slowed to a walk and went to the edge and looked below.

There was the rapid river and the jaggered rocks sticking up everywhere that it would impossible to miss one.

Taking a deep breath she said the only thing that she knew was true and real in her world.

"I love you Jace. Please forgive me," she whispered as tears streamed down her cheeks.

She knew this was going to hurt him, but she couldn't breathe. She wasn't going to wait around for her father to find her which he inevitably will.

Taking one last breath, Clary took a step back before running forward.

Just as her foot left the ledge, she heard the most terrifying sound.

A scream in the form of her name.

"CLARY!"

* * *

**Sorry for the cliffhanger guys! But I have to leave something for you to look forward to in the next chapter, and I have to apologise for the long wait. I never planned on taking this long, but as you may or may not know, I have been having a rough time, and school is just crazy as well . . . **

**But I hoped you like this and continued sticking with me throughout the long waits. **

**Questions:**

*** What do you think Valentine has planned?**

*** Who was it do you think it was that called out Clary's name?**

*** Was it Jace? Alec? Magnus? **

**Review to find out! :D**

**~until next time xoxo**


	11. Chapter 11 - Shattering Of Glass Hearts

Chapter 10

Playlist:

My Manic and I – Laura marling **(Jace and Clary)**

Never Wanna Lose You – DNA **(Clary and Jace)**

Love somebody – Maroon 5 **(Simon and Isabelle)**

Break your heart – Taio Cruz **(Jace, Clary and Jocelyn)**

* * *

_Taking one last breath, Clary took a step back before running forward. _

_Just as her foot left the ledge, she heard the most terrifying sound. _

_A scream in the form of her name. _

"_CLARY!"_

* * *

**JPOV**

After clary ran out of the room, a terrible feeling took place in the pit of Jace's stomach. Ignoring his mother's protests, Jace ran out the door after Clary only to see that she had already left out the front door. When Jace ran out the front door he found Magnus and Alec standing on the front porch looking down the street.

"Where did Clary go?" he asked breathlessly looking both ways down the street.

"She went left, I think she is heading for the park," Magnus said.

You could hear the worry in his voice and Jace remembered that he had known Clary a lot longer than what he himself had, and that Magnus has been her best friend for a long time. He knew what she was capable of and he had more of an idea of where she would go than what he would.

"Why would she go to the park?" Jace asked as he ran down the stairs and started jogging slowly down the Street.

"Because that is where she went the last time," he said anxiously as he and Alec ran alongside of Jace.

"The last time for what?" he asked as he felt his chest tightened with worry. Jace had a feeling he knew the answer and he knew that he wasn't going to like it.

"The last time she tried to kill herself."

Jace lost his balance as his steps failed him, and only Alec grabbing his arm stopped him from falling. Jace breathed deeply. He had already known that Clary had tried to kill herself – she had told him so just the other night – but the idea of her going back to try and finish her unfinished work made him tremble with fear.

He couldn't lose her – he knew that, so finding her only became a more desperate task. He had a _really_ bad feeling that he was going to be too late – that he already _was_ too late.

Standing back up he tore himself down the road and ran even faster towards the park, he knew that he was a quicker runner than what she was, so I was hoping that would be enough to catch her in time before she did something stupid.

As we were running, Jace noticed an alley that led directly to the park, and shaved about two minutes off of running down the road.

Coming to a conclusion he swerved off and ran down the alley. Jace heard Alec calling his name, but he watched as Magnus took his arm and towed him down the road after him.

Jace smiled at Magnus's intelligence. He must have thought that there was a chance that Clary was still heading for the park but hadn't reached it yet, so he was going the long way just in case.

Jace was barely breathing as he ran down the alley. He kept thinking of the worst things that could happen, and what we could find when they got there.

Jace really hoped that she was sitting on the swings crying her eyes out waiting for him to find her. Not doing something senseless.

As he emerged from the Alley Jace arrived at the start of the cliff faces. He could see the park that was down a bit, and he saw Magnus and Alec running into the park.

Jace looked around for Clary and he saw her at the same time Magnus yelled out her name.

"CLARY!"

Jace didn't think as he began to move. He ran towards Clary and he could see that she was running towards the cliff face – and that she had no plans of stopping.

Jace watched as her foot left the edge, and it was then that he reached her.

Jace grabbed her around the waist and spear tackled her to the ground keeping her locked in his safe embrace.

After a few seconds, Jace started to realise that they were both trembling. Jace with fear; and Clary because she was crying.

Pulling back to look down at the girl in his arms he felt his heart break in his chest. Her face was pale and streaked with tears. Her beautiful emerald eyes were rimmed red from crying as she held Jace's shit in her clenched fist as she shook in the circle of his arms.

"Clary, look at me please," Jace pleaded putting a finger under her chin to pull her face up to his so he could see her.

At first, Clary protested but giving up she looked up into his golden eyes, seeing his worry for her.

"What the fuck were you thinking Clary?!" Jace demanded with a slightly angry tone.

This only made Clary shake more as she tried to get out of his hold. Realising that he was getting nowhere by yelling at her, he sighed and stood up, bringing her with him.

"Let's get you home," He murmured to her as he led her towards Magnus and Alec who were still running towards us.

Magnus was the first one to reach us as he stopped in front of Clary and attempted to take her into his embrace but my arms were creating a barrier between us. I refused to let her go.

"Can I hold her Jace?" Magnus asked looking at Jace, but taking one look at Jace's face he decided to just settle with wrapping an arm around her shoulder.

"Clary, what were you thinking?" Magnus asked Clary.

Clary just continued to tremble.

"Come on, we'll get her home and after she's rested we can get answers out of her. She's in too much shock to answer any questions now." Jace said and began walking back towards home.

As they walked, it became apparent that Clary wasn't able to walk properly. Her shaking and being in shock stopped her from functioning properly.

Scooping Clary up in his arms, he carried her the rest of the way bridal style while she shivered and shook in his arm.

Bending down, Jace leaned in to whisper in her ear. "It's alright Clary. Everything will be alright, and I am here, and I love you. I will protect you, I promise," He whispered while pressing a loving kiss to her cheek.

Whether she heard him or not, he wasn't sure, but one thing he did know, was that her trembles calmed the more he kissed and whispered to her, and the tighter he held her, the quicker she was to fall asleep in his arms.

* * *

When Clary awoke, the first thing she was aware of wasn't the hushed voices around her, nor was it the softness of the mattress and blankets around her.

No, it was the emptiness she could feel inside her.

The idea of putting Jace what she did, made her feel hollow and remorseful.

_This_ is why they shouldn't have stopped her. _This _is why she shouldn't be so weak._ This_ is why she should have killed herself – and succeeded this time, but once again she failed. Because she was stopped _again_.

Slowly she blinked open her eyes to find two people arguing. Two people she didn't think she would ever see in a room together.

Her mother and Jace.

Jace stood tense and unyielding. His arms were crossed over his chest in a defensive stance and his eyes shone with anger as he stared – no – _glared_ at my mother.

His appearance seemed a little bit worse for wear. His hair was dishevelled and dark circles hung under his eyes. Clary started to wonder exactly how _long_ she had been 'sleeping'.

Moving her eyes past Jace, she saw her mother. Even though she hadn't seen her mother for ten years, and between those years had only seen her once she could see plainly that see was so alike her mother that it was scary. They had the same red, curly and untamed hair, but where Clary's came to the centre of her back, Jocelyn's barely brushed her shoulders.

Jocelyn stood with her finger pointed at Jace, and she had an angry look in her eye as well.

As Clary tuned into what they were saying she realised that they were fighting over her.

"She is going!" Jocelyn yelled in Jace's face.

"She didn't want to go the first time what makes you think that she will go this time?"

"I will!"

"And you think taking her away from me, away from _us_ will be the best thing to do? We can protect her better than what her absent mother could."

Jocelyn scoffed. "Oh yes, because you did such a great job two days ago didn't you?" She retorted sarcastically.

Clary watched as the fury took over Jace as he uncrossed his arms and strode up to Jocelyn with his fists at his sides shaking.

"I did protect her! I saved her from going off that cliff didn't I? I also saved her from her father, who is probably on his way back to her right now! And where were you when your husband was beating your daughter senseless? Oh yeah, whoring off with another guy!" Jace yelled seeming to forget that Clary was in the same room 'sleeping'.

"He is _not_ my husband, he is my _ex_-husband! And I was not whoring around! I found a better man! You're on the same road to becoming what Valentine is!" Jocelyn spat.

Jace snapped. Clary could see the change in him taking place. He went from controlled anger, to full blown fury.

"I would _never_ touch Clary like that or any other woman for that fact! You know, Valentine may have physically and sexually abused her, but you also emotionally abused Clary whether you know it or not!" He yelled in her face and Clary watched as Jocelyn flinched about the rape.

"But the sexual abuse was only that one time."

Jace laughed. He actually laughed. "Jocelyn, you must be more naïve than I thought if you think that the sexual abuse only happened once. Either that or you're just stupid."

Jocelyn glared. "How dare you-"

Clary chose that moment to interrupt tired of hearing them fighting.

"Jace?" She breathed blinking her eyes tiredly and turning her head towards him.

Instantly, Jace's argument with Jocelyn was forgotten the moment he heard the sound of his angels voice. His head whipped around and his eyes widened as a grin spread across her face as he took in her form.

She had no idea what she looked like, but she could guess she didn't look the best. After all – an attempted suicide never made anyone look pretty.

Within two long strides Jace was kneeling beside Clary and he took her hand in his.

Clary," Jace breathed as he pressed his lips to her forehead. "How are you feeling baby?"

"I feel good. How long have I been asleep?" Clary asked trying to sit up.

Seeing what she was trying to do, Jace put a hand on her waist and one on her lower back to assist her.

"About thirty six hours. But seriously, how do you feel?" he asked looking intensely into her eyes.

Clary knew that Jace wasn't asking about her physical wellbeing, but rather her mental and emotional wellbeing. Just looking at her you could see that she was fine – except for the scratch on her elbow from being spear tackled – but other than that she was physically ok.

"I-I've felt better," she admitted dropping her gaze and started playing with a stay strand off the quilt.

Jace put a hand under her chin and lightly lifted her face back up to his.

"Hey . . . I know ok? I've been where you have been before." He soothed.

"You have?" She asked shyly.

"remember I'm a foster child?" Jace laughed softly.

Clary blushed embarrassed. "Oh yeah."

Behind them Jocelyn scoffed. "Oh please. Stop dragging it out. You are fine, and you're just dragging it out and being a burden to everybody."

Jace shot to his feet and faced Jocelyn angrily.

"She is anything but a burden, Jocelyn. You however . . ." He said menacingly.

"Jace," Clary said reaching out and grabbing his hand. "It's fine."

"No it is not fine, Clary. It is anything but _fine_."

Clary frowned. "What are you talking about?"

Jace sighed and opened his mouth to reply but Jocelyn bet him to it.

"You're moving to live with me."

Clary laughed suddenly understanding what hers and Jace's argument was over last time, and Clary was inclined to agree with Jace.

"I'm sorry Jocelyn, but I'm not. I'm going to stay here with Jace."

This time Jocelyn snorted. "Still calling me by my name huh?"

Clary shrugged casually. "Well you haven't exactly earned the title of 'mother' have you?"

Jocelyn glared but turned towards the door. "You haven't got a choice clay, I'll be back at six o'clock to pick you up and you better be packed to come home."

Now Clary glared with anger. "I _am_ home."

Jocelyn laughed. "These people aren't your family Clary."

"Their more of a family than what you or dad is."

Jocelyn stopped from where she had her hand on the door knob and turned to look back at Clary. For a moment Clary thought that she was going to give up and that she would be able to stay. But she should have known better. Clary never got what she wanted in life. Even if it was something as simple as staying with Jace. It was still too much of a big ask – and she wouldn't be able to have it.

"You should be packed by six o'clock because whether you are or not you are, I'm coming to pick you up and you are going to live with me and Luke in Brooklyn."

"Brooklyn?!" Clary exclaimed.

Jocelyn nodded. "I thought I mentioned that last time I visited."

"But that is so far away! How do you expect me to see Jace every day?" Clary demanded.

Jocelyn smiled, but nothing about the smile was heart-felt. "Here's the thing," she whispered. "I don't."

Clary gasped as Jace replied angrily; "You can't do that! You can't stop her from seeing me."

Jocelyn smiled but this time she didn't even attempt to hide the cruelty from her expression. "I can do anything I want. I am her mother and she is my daughter. So excuse me for making a parental choice."

"You've never made a 'parental choice' you've always done what you want. Remember when I was seven? And you left me with that . . . _monster_ . . . to live your own life with your new 'husband'?" Clary fought.

Jocelyn glared before yelling back over her shoulder.

"Six o'clock!"

* * *

Simon stood on the steps of the huge mansion shaking with nervousness. Not only was he here to see Isabelle – beautiful Isabelle – but also to see his best friend Clary.

Yesterday Simon had gotten a rather distressed phone call from Magnus and at first he couldn't understand anything Magnus had been saying until he managed to calm the raving lunatic down.

*_Flashback_*

_Simon had his eyes glued to his television screen when the sharp ringing sound from his phone roused him from his game of Call Of Duty game. Sighing with annoyance he paused his game before answering his phone. Looking at the caller ID he could see that it was Magnus. _

_This made him sigh again in annoyance. _

"_What do you want Magnus?" _

"_Clarytriedtocommitsuicide." He said in one big rush. _

_Simon frowned and turned away from the screen. _

"_What did you say?"_

_Magnus took a deep steadying breath on the other end of the line. _

"_Clary. Tried. To. Commit. Suicide." _

_Simon froze, the grape that he was in the process of eating stuck half way to his mouth. _

"_What?" Simon laughed. "I thought you said Clary committed suicide." _

_On the other end, Magnus huffed with irritation. "I'm serious Si, she tried to kill herself."_

"_What when?" Simon asked quickly, feeling the rising panic. _

_The image of her tying a rope around the swing set two years ago was still fresh in his mind. _

"_Just before. Maryse was talking to her and she had a panic attack or something, and when Jace started talking to Maryse she totally freaked out and ran. Jace, Alec and I followed her and Jace managed to grab her before she launched herself off the cliff face." he explained. _

_Simon forced himself to breathe deeply and slowly. "A cliff face?" he asked faintly. _

"_Yeah. Right now she is sleeping and Jace is with her. He refuses to leave her side." _

_Simon chuckled humourlessly. "I can imagine. I'm coming over ok?" he said starting to stand up but Magnus's voice stopped him._

"_no don't bother. You can't talk to her anyway, she's completely out of it. When Jace was carrying her home, she fainted or passed out or something, but she has been sleeping since."_

"_That doesn't really comfort me Magnus. It sounds like she's in a coma or something."_

"_No, seriously, she is fine, Simon. You can come around tomorrow though if you want. I dare say she will be awake then."_

"_Alright," Simon replied and then it was silent for several seconds before Magnus spoke again. _

"_Jocelyn found out about everything today. She found out about how Clary tried to commit suicide and how Valentine . . . raped . . . Clary more than once. She presumed that it was only a once off thing. She also found out about how Clary cuts and that and-" he stopped talking. _

"_And what Magnus?"_

"_And she wants Clary to move with her tomorrow. She said she was going to talk to Clary about it tomorrow when she wakes up." He said._

"_you mean _if_ she wakes up," Simon muttered to himself. _

"_Simon, she will. She's strong, she's been through much worse than this."_

"_Yeah, but it was only a matter of time before she snapped. We both knew that."_

_Magnus sighed again. "Yeah I know. But seriously, Simon. She will be sleeping all day so just come around tomorrow to see her ok?" he said. _

_Simon sighed giving in. "Yeah alright, I'll see you tomorrow?" it came out as a question. _

_Magnus nodded. "Yeah you will."_

*_End of flashback_*

Simon was brought out of his mind when the front door opened and there stood an older version of Isabelle. Her black her and icy blue eyes were the same, but the mature air, and wrinkles surrounding her eyes told Simon that this wasn't Isabelle.

Awkwardly, Simon cleared his throat.

"Um, hi. I'm Simon, I'm here to see Isabelle and Clary." He said.

The woman smiled kindly. "You must be Simon."

Simon nodded.

"Yes, Isabelle told me you were coming around. She's just in her room if you wanted to head up there now."

Simon swallowed heavily. "Oh, um ok. Thanks." He gave her a tight smile as he walked around her and bound up the stairs to where he knew that Isabelle's room was. After all, he had been in there before remembering their last makeout session, he quickly pulled his head back in to where it was heading towards the gutter.

After climbing the long flight of stairs he found himself outside Isabelle's room and he knock hesitantly on her door. After several seconds the door opened and there stood Isabelle in all her glory.

As he took her in, he saw that she was wearing a dress. A very nice dress at that.

Her hair hung low down her back in long tendrils and her makeup was done to perfection. The dress she wore had spaghetti straps with light breezy material that fluttered around her as she moved.

A bright smile lit her face as she looked at him.

"Hey Isabelle," He greeted.

Isabelle smiled – if possibly wider and grabbed him by his collar and pulled him inside.

Once inside, Isabelle brought his lips down to hers and kissed him with a fiery passion. Her lips were hard against his as her tongue flicked out to trace his lower lip before she plunged it into his mouth. As he kissed her back, he trailed his lips across her cheek and down her jaw to where they trailed down her neck and he could feel her shiver with delight as he bit her gently. Her hands trailed down his chest to the hem of his t-shirt where with one look in his eyes she pulled it up and over his head.

He knew that in the back of his mind, that he probably shouldn't be doing this, especially with Maryse downstairs and when he came to ask about Clary – but he couldn't find it within himself to pull away and kill the moment he was in.

Isabelle knew that he was a virgin and that fact both scared and excited him beyond measure. After all, a beautiful girl like Isabelle couldn't possibly be a virgin, which he knew she wasn't but the fact didn't bother him. It was the fact that he _was_ that bothered him.

He knew that she would probably either find him to be really bad being a virgin, or she was going to blow his mind with her experience – Probably both he thought.

But as they stumbled their way to the bed and Simon laid Isabelle down gently on the mattress beneath him the thoughts were pushed to the back of his mind as he pulled the zipper to her dress down her back.

As the dress became loose, Isabelle shimmered out of it, so that the material feel to her waist exposing her chest covered by a bra. Simon tugged the dress the rest of the way down and briefly stood up to unbuckle his belt, and to discard his jeans and shoes. Finally they were both just left in their underwear and Simon crawled down he was above her again.

After kissing some more, Simon pulled back to look in Isabelle's eyes for permission before he got rid of her bra. From the slight nod of her head, he could feel other parts of his body becoming excited.

As the bra fell to the floor Simon fasted his eyes on the first pair of real naked breasts that he had seen – and they were absolutely magnificent.

From all of the porn he had watched growing up and becoming a normal teenage boy, none of that could have prepared him for the beauty that was in front of him.

It was obvious that the women from _those_ videos had fake boobs, fake hair, and well – fake everything. But as he looked at Izzy, he could tell that everything was one hundred percent natural. And he loved every minute of it.

Slowly he ran a finger down from her chin, down her neck, and across her collar bone to go down between the cleavage of her two bosoms. Stopping just above them, Simon watched as he cupped one of her breasts in his hand and began to massage it.

The look of ecstasy and the moan of pleasure that came from her lips almost made him come undone just there right in that moment.

Isabelle opened her eyes as his hand moved from her breast and for a moment she was confused before she saw him going for her underwear.

Smiling at him, Simon removed her underwear and sucked in a breath at what he was saw.

After several heavy moments of staring, he swallowed and looked up into Isabelle's eyes to see that she was biting her lower lip with nervousness.

For what he had no idea.

"Why are you nervous?" He whispered against her lips as he removed his own boxers and his hardened member sprang free.

"Because this time I will be with someone I love." She whispered back, even though there was no one around that could hear them.

Simon smiled and kissed her again, longer this time. "I do love you, and even though you're not a virgin, I still want to make this special for you," he said making a complete fool of himself.

Isabelle chuckled lightly. "As long as it is with you, it will be special Si." She promised as she grinded her hips against his making him moan with the friction it was creating.

After a long time of foreplay and making out, they were both finally ready and Simon was positioning himself at Isabelle's entrance.

"Tell me if I'm not doing something right, ok?" he said.

Isabelle smiled. "I doubt you could do something wrong," she said before kissing him and urging him to sheath himself inside of her.

Once he was, he groaned with satisfaction. No wet dream or any day dreams could compare to the real thing and it was oh so much better in real life.

After several seconds of just savouring at being inside of her, Simon began to move.

Slowly he moved out before thrusting back in all the way to the hilt, and he was going at a steady pace until Isabelle gasped out.

"Faster. Harder." She demanded and Simon was only too willing to satisfy her.

Picking up the pace, he was pounding into her, bringing them both to their climaxes, Simon being only a few moments behind Isabelle.

When he finished he collapsed on top of Isabelle but quickly rolled over so he didn't squash her with his weight. Lying back on the bed, Simon wrapped an arm around Isabelle and brought her into his chest while he tugged the blankets around them.

Gently, Simon pressed a kiss to her forehead as she snuggled in closer to his body and watched as she fell into a peaceful sleep. The smile not quite leaving her face as she slept.

Though before she fell asleep, Simon heard her mumble.

"I love you Simon."

Simon kissed her again but this time on the lips.

"I love you too Isabelle." He breathed but he wasn't sure whether she heard him or not.

After lying there for a while afterwards, Simon started to fall into his own peaceful sleep.

* * *

Clary was sitting on the edge of her bed, with Jace sitting beside her as she swung her legs backwards and forwards nervously.

"I don't want to go Jace," Clary said looking down at her swinging feet.

Jace watched her feet too. "I know."

"But she is going to make me. And I don't want to leave you. She will be here any minute." Clary said fretfully.

"Maybe it will be for the best."

Clary's head snapped up to look at Jace. "What the hell does that mean? How could this possibly for the best Jace?"

Jace avoided her eyes and looked down at his hands in his lap and seemed to be having an internal debate with himself. After several long moments he looked up at Clary and the look on his face scared her.

What was his normally easy to read and loving expression, was a cold, hard and expressionless face, showing that he had no plans to letting her in. He was completely shutting her out, and just the realization of that fact made her draw away from him.

As she shifted a brief flash of pain flew across his face before it went back to the cold mask.

"Maybe, I was wrong. Maybe this was a bad idea."

Clary was stunned. "W-Wrong? What was a bad idea?" She stuttered.

"Us. This. Being together. I was wrong. You're wrong. You're not the right girl for me and I was stupid for thinking that you were. The only thing I am sorry about is leading you on." He said in a hard voice as he looked in her eyes.

Clary's mouth hung open as she could feel the start of her heart splintering. "What are you talking about?"

"I am saying that I am breaking up with you Clary. You will be better off." He said coldly.

Clary sat there panting as if she couldn't catch her breath. And she couldn't. Her whole world had just stopped spinning. Everything that was right, and everything that was safe, just told her it was leaving her. _Jace_ was leaving her.

"What did I ever do?" Clary whispered with the tears trailing down her cheeks.

"You didn't do anything; I'm just ready to move on." He stated standing up from the bed.

"Is it because I tried to kill myself? Because if it is, I'm sorry, ok? I am so, so sorry about that Jace and I promise I will get better, but I need you. I need you _so, so_ _much_ Jace. Please don't leave me." She pleaded starting to stand up and go after him.

Jae stopped with his hand on the door, and turned to look back at her over his shoulder.

"I just did Clary." He said and then paused to listen down the hall. Before he left he turned to mutter. "You're mum's here. Have a good life Clary." He whispered this time and Clary could hear the pain in his voice.

Did it hurt him as much it was hurting her?

If her heart was splintered before, it was well and truly broken now.

Clary watched opened mouthed as the only boy she had ever loved walk out of her life.

Seconds later her mum came into the room along with Maryse. The look on Maryse's face told Clary that she knew what had just happened and her face showed how sorry she was. And there was also . . . Pity? Was that it? Clary had been pitied all her life, so now was no different, but she didn't want it, nor did she ever did.

Her mother on the other hand seemed oblivious to her daughters heart break. She strode into the room and looked around, probably searching for her bag but came up empty handed.

"Are you ready to go? Where's your stuff?" Jocelyn demanded walking around the room.

"I don't have it. It was left at dads and I haven't been here long enough to have anything." Clary responded robotically.

From the doorway, Maryse flinched at her tone.

"Alright, well let's go." Jocelyn ordered and marched out the room. Clary followed meekly after her but paused to give Maryse a gentle hug.

"Thank you," she whispered to the older woman. "For everything."

Maryse squeezed her back. "That's quite alright dear. Don't be a stranger ok? Come visit us." She said.

Clary grimaced at the pain in her chest from Maryse statement. "I don't think I can, Maryse."

Maryse nodded solemnly. "I'm so sorry Clary."

From the doorway, Clary heard her mother sigh with irritation.

"Come on Clary."

Clary let go of Maryse and followed her mother out the door. she followed her down stairs and outside where she got in the car and turned back to look at the mansion once she was in.

As Jocelyn started the car, she saw Maryse waving goodbye from the front porch and when she looked up she saw the curtains drawn back from one of the windows and saw Jace looking out.

As the car pulled away from the curve his eyes met hers for one last time.

The last thing she saw before she rounded the corner, was the tears falling down Jace's cheeks.

* * *

**Bet you didn't see that one coming huh? ;)**

**Sorry if this chapter was really bad guys. I kind of rushed it, because I was getting it done in between all of the loads of homework I have, but I still owed you guys an update, because it has been a while. **

**~Question of day ~**

**What are the five top things you want to know about me?**

**I will answer the five most common questions at the start of my next update. **

**~Until next time :) xoxo**


	12. Chapter 12 - Behind These Hazel Eyes

Chapter 11

* * *

**Quick AN: For the purpose of this chapter it is important for me to note that in this story, Idris is located between Brooklyn and New York since it is a made up town. And when Clary moved she moved to Williamsburg in Brooklyn. **

***Now the five answers about me that I promised to answer:***

**1) I am 17 years old.**

**2) I live in Australia in Victoria.**

**3) Favourite books would be TMI/TID and the Vampire academy series.**

**4) My favourite movie is the Disney movie Tangled.**

**5) My favourite author would be Cassie Clare and Rachelle Mead. (Author of Vampire academy)**

**Also, just a quick shout out to my girlBlackHairAndBlueEyesPrincess. I love you Chicken!**

* * *

Playlist:

When You're Gone – Avril Lavigne **(Clary)**

Let Her Go – passenger **(Jace)**

Behind These Hazel Eyes – Kelly Clarkson **(Clary and Jace)**

* * *

It had been two days. Two days since Clary had moved from her bed, ate or drank anything and slept. She tried to sleep, but every time she would close her eyes the scene was there replaying over and over in her mind like a broken record that was trying to torture her.

Her mother had come in and out several times saying to get over herself and to get out of the 'phase' she was in, but her mother had no idea how much Clary was hurting. She didn't know of how it hurt to breath and how her eyes were starting to sting from the lack of sleep.

But the worse thing was the ache in the centre of her chest. Her heart was beyond being repaired. It was shattered and broken and unable of being able to beat again.

Maybe she was being a bit melodramatic, but Jace was her first boyfriend and she just knew that he was the love of her life. How she knew that she didn't know, but deep down she was sure of it.

But he had let her go.

He had said that he didn't love her anymore.

"_I was wrong. You're wrong. You're not the right girl for me and I was stupid for thinking that you were. The only thing I am sorry about is leading you on."_ Those had been his words and they had cut her deep.

Luke, her mother's new husband, however, Clary actually liked. He came in and gave her dinner, but didn't try to make her eat it, and he also brought in cups of tea for her even though she let them go cold.

He was no idiot either. Unlike her mother whom seemed ignorant to what Valentine had done to her and refused to believe it, Luke took it and accepted it. He also knew how she felt about Jace, or so he said he did. He told her the day before how the girl that he was in love with when he was in high school dumped him and left him for another guy.

Luke offered her if she wanted to talk to him on several occasions but she denied each time saying how she wasn't capable to talk and that it was too painful to talk about. Also that she didn't quite trust him yet, though there was something about him that made Clary like him immediately.

She still had the phone that Jace had given her, but she had started to ignore the messages that were coming through. They weren't from Jace like she had hoped, but rather from Izzy, who at first were asking her random things but now they were becoming more insistent things like "_Are you ok?_" and "_why won't you message me? Are you safe? Let me know xx"_ that was six hours ago and Izzy had stopped sending texts and Clary was both relieved and saddened. Sad because she was losing contact to her best friend and a connection to Jace, but was relieved because every time she wouldn't have to experience the disappointment again and again when she saw that it was Izzy's name on the screen, not Jace's.

Clary was brought out of her thoughts by her door flying open and her mother walking purposefully in the room, Luke was behind her looking slightly anxious.

"I'm sick of your behaviour Clary," she stated bluntly as she came in the room.

Clary rolled my eyes and looked at the ceiling. "So I've been told."

Clary's mother glared at her. "Don't speak to me with that tone young lady!" she snapped. "Anyway, I'm tired of you just lying around doing nothing except feeling sorry for yourself, so I took matters into my own hands."

Now Clary frowned and sat up to look at her. "What did you do?"

"I got you a job. You start tonight." Jocelyn said looking rather proud of herself.

"Doing what?" Clary demanded standing up glaring at her mother furiously.

"You work in restaurant. The manager asked if you could sing and I said you could, so you will be entertaining tonight. Maybe serving food the next day, I don't really know."

This was starting to remind her too much of working in the bar back at home for Marcus and how she had to give her money to Valentine.

"Do you work?" Clary questioned.

"No, but Luke does."

Clary scoffed. "So why do I have a job?"

"To get you off your arse and to learn some responsibility."

Clary fumed. "I do know what responsibility is! I had to basically raise myself because dad was too drunk to even stand every night so I had to teach myself how to cook and got beaten several times because Valentine's dinner was burnt the first few times I cooked. Not to mention that I had to clean, work a job and pay all the bills as well as supply dad with money for his alcohol just to avoid several beatings! So don't get me started Jocelyn!"

Jocelyn grew angrier and angrier with each word that passed Clary's lips and she stormed up to Clary. "I find it hard to believe that he hit you so often because that wasn't the man that I married and was friends with for so many years. Sure he did hit you a few times, I can see that but I don't believe the stories about how often the beatings were or that he raped you. A father wouldn't rape his own daughter." Jocelyn said.

Clary felt like crying. "And what about Jonathan. You're going to think that he didn't do anything either?"

"Nothing was said about Jonathan."

"WHY DO YOU THINK HE IS LOCKED UP?!" Clary exploded at her mother.

Jocelyn took a step back at her daughters' words. "Look I am telling you Clary. I may not be with your father anymore, and sure he may hit you a few times but I know that he wouldn't rape anyone. He is too kind hearted for that."

Clary felt as if she had been kicked in the stomach. "Kind hearted?" she breathed.

Jocelyn just looked at her stonily and for the first time Clary saw Luke looking at his wife with shock and a bit of anger which surprised Clary.

Her mother didn't say anything only just continued to stare at Clary. "Valentine is anything but kind hearted mother. He is a cold, abusive _piece of shit_." She growled.

Before Clary knew it, her mother's hand was cracking across her face sending it to one side, making Clary gasp with surprise.

Jocelyn was glaring at Clary but Clary got out of her bed and stood up looking her mother in the eyes. Something she was able to do seeing as how she was the same height.

"You touch me again, and I will report you just like I did with Valentine, and you are on a fast road to making me leave and going back to Maryse." She threatened.

Clary knew in her heart that she couldn't go to go back to the Lightwood's mansion. She knew that they would take her back in without a second thought, but she couldn't knowing that Jace was there. Being under the same roof as him and not being in his arms was too painful to even think about.

"You go anywhere, and I will charge Maryse with kidnapping," Jocelyn threatened back.

Clary gasped. "You wouldn't do that!" She argued.

Jocelyn smirked. "But I would. You start work in two hours, so I suggest that you start getting ready."

"I'm not like most sluts that need hours to get ready to go somewhere Jocelyn." Clary sighed.

Jocelyn glared. "But I want you too. I want you to look good, so do as your told."

"Where is this restaurant anyway?" Clary asked.

"In Red Hook. It takes about fifteen minutes to drive there."

Clary sighed. "Fine. Then leave me alone so I can get ready then." She ordered.

Her mother turned and left without a word, but Luke hesitated and hung around a bit after Jocelyn had left.

"You need something Luke?" Clary asked going through her dresser.

She was always kinder and spoke softer to Luke than what she did with her mother because Luke was really nice and hadn't done anything to make her hate him like she did with her mother and Valentine.

"Actually I do. I was just wondering if I could talk to you for a moment?" it came out as a sort of question.

Clary nodded and sat down on her bed giving him her full attention. "Sure."

Luke paused to look over his shoulder and after thinking for a moment he went over and closed the door. This made Clary nervous and she couldn't help but wrap her arms around herself to make it feel like she was safe.

Seeing her frightened expression, Luke hurried to sooth and reassure her. "Oh! No! It's not what you think, I promise. I can stay over here if you would like, I just don't want your mother to overhear our conversation."

Despite herself, Clary sighed with relief. She didn't trust Luke yet, but he had never lied to her or miss lead her in the three days she had known him and something told her that he was telling the truth even now. And the fact that he offered to stay on the other side of the room softened Clary with how thoughtful he was, but also made her curious as to how he knew what to do and what not to do.

"I just wanted to say that, I believe you about your father and what he did to you for starters. You wouldn't act the way you do, or be so frightened of me if he didn't. So I know. Also, your general body language screams it . . ." he said.

Clary looked away feeling awkward. She didn't know what to say to that.

"And also, I just want you to know that, you can talk to me about that if you want. I know how you feel and what you went through."

Now Clary was angry. "How could you know? You're not the first one to pretend to know what I went through you know. All my friends pretended and the cops and the social worker. They all did. The only one who didn't was Jace."

Clary swallowed against the lump in her throat. _Don't cry. You will not cry_, she instructed herself.

Luke sighed and ran a hand through his hair, appearing nervous. This also made the glasses slip down the bridge of his nose so he pushed them back up impatiently.

"Maybe it is time to tell you a little story Clary." He sighed.

Clary frowned. "What story."

"About the time when me and my sisters were all abused by our father."

Clary gaped. Surely it wasn't true.

Seeing her look Luke tugged up the sleeves of his checkered farmer's shirt to expose his scared arms. Like hers, his scars covered the whole of her forearm, both on top and underneath. Some scars were pink and others had faded to a pale white colour but still noticeable.

"My sisters, Ariana and Mackenna were both raped and beatened by my father where as I was only ever hit. My father would stumble home drunk and hit me and then go upstairs to rape my sisters. Even though I was in agony, I went upstairs to try and stop him which only ended up with me being hurt more and my sisters being raped anyway. This went on for many years until when I turned eighteen I beat the shit out of my dad after I snapped one night and then ran away with both my sisters who Ariana was fourteen and Mackenna was sixteen and became their legal guardians. Our father was never caught or put in Jail and but he never came back after us. I got a job and supported myself and Ariana and Mackenna, and when Mackenna finished high school she went to college and is now a nurse. Ariana preferred to sing and act and so she got into an acting school which she still attends. She mainly stars in local plays and shows but she was once offered to star in a TV commercial which was her big break through so now she is doing well with her own family. And just like you, I used to turn to self-harm to help me deal with everything. It still haunts me today, but your mother made me happy so that is why I married her. Your mother doesn't treat you fairly I can see that, and I don't know why she is acting the way she is, because she was so kind and compassionate when she was with me. So I don't know what happened. It only started when she found out that Valentine was abusing you for the first time. So when I say I know how you feel and that I know what you are going through – I really do ok? So I hope me telling you this is just that next step into getting you to trust me Clary. But I know that it will take you awhile. After all, I didn't trust anyone after the abuse from my father, and my girlfriend leaving me for another guy. Until I met your mother, I didn't trust anybody."

Clary sat on her bed and she realised that her mouth was hanging open so she quickly shut it. "So you mean to tell me that Jocelyn has no idea what you went through?" Clary asked.

Luke shook his head. "No. None."

Clary shook her head with disbelief. "Wow, I can't belief what you went through. I mean, you are just so . . . buff that it is hard to imagine that you were abused like me."

Luke laughed. "Yes, well, I wasn't always buff like this. I only started to work out in the school gym just before I eventually beat my dad up and gave him what he deserved after all those years."

Clary gave Luke a nervous smile. "Hearing your story gives me hope that I can get through mine."

Luke looked at her with a gentle smile. "I know you will Clary. You're a strong girl, I can see that in you."

Clary smiled at him, but didn't know how to answer, so she didn't.

Luke smiled at her for several more moments before he snapped back to reality while clearing his throat. "Yes, well. If you get ready, I can drive you to work if you want."

Clary nodded. "I would like that. Thanks Luke."

He gave her another smile. "It's no problem Clare."

* * *

Jace was sitting in his room staring out his bedroom window, watching as the rain slapped noisily against the panes of the windows glass. He hadn't moved for three days out of his room. Since the day that Clary left and he had broken both of their hearts, her absence was becoming more and more apparent. He knows that she probably hated him, but rightly so. After all, he had thrown her love for him and her trust in him back in her face after he said those horrid words to her.

"_I was wrong. You're wrong. You're not the right girl for me and I was stupid for thinking that you were. The only thing I am sorry about is leading you on."_

He hadn't meant any of them of course, he was more in love with the girl than he had ever cared or loved anyone before. She was his world, and while she had turned his world upside down, she was still the stilling point in it and the constant in his life.

Well . . . That was until he shattered her heart. The look on her face when he told her that he didn't love her and that their relationship was a mistake only made him want to take her in his arms and kiss her and beg for her forgiveness. The pain that was in her eyes and the grief that was on her face nearly knocked him to his knees.

He remembered how furious Isabelle had been with him after she heard that he had broken up with Clary. She had stormed into his room and slapped him across the face.

_*Flashback*_

_Jace had just watched as the car that held Clary pulled away from the drive and rounded around the corner. Before she left, she met her eyes for the last time and he could see the pain in her eyes that he himself had caused. _

_Jace sighed and turned towards his bed. He had just stretched out on his bed, prepared to face the inevitable pain when his door burst open. _

_Looking up he saw a furious Isabelle, and to keep up his appearance of not caring he smirked at her. _

"_You ever heard of knocking sis?" He smirked._

_Isabelle didn't reply, instead she strode over to the bed where he was and her hand connected with his face._

_Slowly, Jace looked back at Isabelle rubbing his reddening cheek gingerly and fixed his eyes on her furiously. _

"_What the hell was that for?!" He demanded. _

"_For hurting Clary! Why the hell did you break up with her?!" Isabelle commanded. _

"_Because I didn't love her anymore and thought it was better than to lead her on longer than what I already had." _

_Isabelle glared at him. "Bullshit! I don't believe that for a second Jace Lightwood! So you better tell me the truth or else!" _

_Now Jace was angry. "How do you know I'm not bullshitting? Maybe it is true!" he fired back. _

"_Because I can see it in your face! You're in pain and I can tell you still love her."_

_Jace looked down. "I had to do it Iz." He sighed defeated. _

_Isabelle sat next to him. "Why?" She asked gently. _

"_For her safety. She wasn't safe here."_

_Isabelle frowned. "What do you mean? Of course she was."_

_Jace shook his head. "No, Valentine got out of Jail, and he knew that she was with me, so here would be the first place that he would look. So when her mother came and said that she was taking Clary with her, and at first I refused. But when I had a talk with Maryse, and I realised that if she did leave she would be safe from her father because he wouldn't know where she was." _

"_What? Valentine escaped? How?"_

_Jace shook his head. "I don't know, but Jonathan did too. That's why Clary tried to run off the cliff because she thought that if she killed herself then it would be all over."_

_Isabelle's once angry face now filled with compassion. "Oh Jace . . ." She breathed. _

_Jace shrugged and turned over on his bed so that his back was facing her. _

"_Can you please just leave me alone?" He asked. _

_He felt Isabelle get up off the bed. "Sure Jace. I'm here if you need anything ok?"_

_Jace didn't say anything as she made her way out. _

_*Flashback ended*_

That had been the first day that clary left and every few hours Isabelle would try to come and talk to him and check on him, but he had locked his bedroom door and didn't allow anyone to come in.

His mind went back to what had influenced him to make the decision of breaking up with Clary. He hadn't wanted to of course but a few wise words from his mother had convinced him that maybe it would be for the best.

_*Flashback*_

_Jace knocked on the door of his mother's office and heard her voice say "come in". _

"_Hey Mum," he greeted. "You told Izzy you wanted to see me?"_

_Maryse nodded and put the papers aside that she was looking at. "Yes, I do. Sit down Jace."_

_Confused Jace agreed. Sitting down he couldn't help but turn his thoughts back to Clary who was asleep in his bed. After he had carried her back home after catching her from letting her fall off the cliff he was determined to never let her go again. _

_The way her hair spread out over his pillows soaking them with her floral and strawberry scent as her eyelashes battered against her cheekbones while she dreamed was mesmerising. _

"_I wanted to talk to you about Clary."_

_Jace automatically got defensive. "What about?" _

"_Her mother called earlier . . ." Maryse began before she was cut off by Jace. _

"_That woman isn't coming here or anywhere near Clary."_

_Maryse frowned. "Why do you hate her so much?" she asked curiously._

"_Because she isn't a very good mother. She didn't even believe Clary that her father had raped her."_

_Maryse looked shocked. "She didn't?"_

_Jace shook his head. "No, she said that 'that wasn't the man she knows and that he wouldn't do that.' Or well, that's what she said to me. I wanted to hit her. I should have hit her."_

"_No matter what she does or say I don't think you should do that. I don't think it would impress Clary anyway."_

_Jace glowered. "I think it would." He muttered. "So what did you want to speak to me about her with anyway?"_

"_Oh, well as you know, Valentine got out of jail . . ." Maryse began._

"_As I am painfully aware of. But neither of those nitwits will touch her."_

_Maryse grimaced before she spoke, like it was as if she didn't want to say what she was about to. "I don't think Clary should stay here anymore . . ." _

_Jace jumped to his feet. "What?! What are you talking about? Where the hell is she supposed to go?" _

_Maryse put her hands up as if she was trying to calm him down. "Jace please just hear me out. Valentine escaped out of Jail, and we all know that he wants Clary, that is no secret. So where do you think he is going to come looking for her first?" She asked._

_Jace frowned. "Here, but I will be here to stop them. They can't hurt her if I am here to protect her."_

"_But wouldn't it be better if it didn't have to come to that at all?" Maryse asked. _

_Jace looked at her. "What do you mean?"_

"_Well, if Clary went to live with her mother, Valentine knows that Clary doesn't like her mother so it will be one of the last places that he will look." Maryse reasoned. _

_Jace thought. "Well . . . I guess you're right . . . But Clary won't leave with her mother because she won't want to leave me."_

"_I thought of that, and I thought of an answer too," Maryse said. _

_Jace looked at her expectantly. "Well?"_

_Maryse hesitated. "I think you need to break up with her Jace," she said sadly._

_Jace got angry all over again. "What! Why?"_

"_Well think about it Jace, she's not going to leave with you being here, but if you hurt her, she is going to leave to want to get away from you."_

_Jace felt as if the room was closing in around him and was struggling to draw in a breath. "So you want me to break both of our hearts and shatter the only trust she has ever put into someone?" he asked his voice sounding hoarse. _

_Maryse only nodded looking pained. "I don't want this either Jace, really, I don't. But it's for the best and you know that it is."_

_Jace looked at the ground. "I don't know if I can do that mum. It will kill her." He said surprised to find that his voice broke on the end and his eyes were getting wet with tears. _

"_Oh my baby . . ." Maryse soothed coming around to wrap her arms around him. _

_For the first time since he had been ten years old, he felt like he needed his mum so he wrapped his arms around her tightly and clung to her while she tried soothing him. _

"_It will be for the best, and maybe . . . when this is all over, you can go see her and apologise and she might surprise you by forgiving you and everything will go back to the way it was." She suggested. _

_Jace shook his head. "Nothing will ever go back to the way it was mum."_

_After a few minutes of hugging each other, Jace dried his eyes and stood up to walk towards the door. _

"_Where are you going?" Maryse asked. _

"_To break my girlfriend's heart."_

_*Flashback ended*_

Jace came back to reality after being lost in his thoughts for who knows how long and decided that it was probably time to join his family again.

Sighing he got up from his bed and stretched, then walked over to his bathroom where he looked in the mirror above the sink.

There staring back at him was the image of a living-dead teenage boy. His hair was all mattered and he had black circles under his eyes from being unable to sleep.

Jace sighed again, and began brushing his teeth. It didn't do much of a difference to his appearance but at least it was an improvement.

After splashing his face with cold water and drying it off with a towel he turned and made his way to the kitchen figuring that that was where his mother was.

When he reached the kitchen sure enough, Maryse was bustling around the room with a fry pan on the stove and steaks cooking in it while she pulled some scones out of the oven. At the sound of his footsteps, she looked up and a look of surprise flitted across his face.

"Jace!" she cried.

Jace smiled weakly. "Hey mum."

Abandoning the scones and the frying pan, she came around the bench to wrap Jace up in a tight hug. After several moments, Jace returned her embrace.

When Maryse pulled back she wiped a stray tear that had escaped her eye and smiled at Jace.

"I was so worried about you Jace, how are you feeling? Are you hungry? Can I get you anything?" she asked quickly turning around to put some jam and cream on two scones for him.

"Thanks . . . but I'm not hungry mum. I can't eat."

"But Jace, you haven't eaten at all while you've been up in your room sweetie."

Jace grimaced. "That's because I can't stomach anything."

Maryse gave him an apologetic look and came over to rest her hand against his cheek. "I know it hurts now, but it will get easier. I promise."

Jace shook his head. "It will never get easier mum."

Their moment was broken by the sound of several pairs of feet thundering into the kitchen and when he looked up he found Izzy, Alec, Simon and Magnus coming into the room.

"Jace!" Izzy squealed and threw her arms around his neck.

"Jesus Izzy, I need my ears you know," Jace snarked.

Izzy giggled which was very out of character for her, but she was happy to have her older brother back.

"You look like hell brother," Alec commented coming over to give Jace a quick hug.

When Jace turned around to look at Maryse he discovered with some surprise that she had left the room already.

Turning back to Alec, Jace replied to him. "I know, I'm always stunningly attractive," he boasted.

Izzy gave him a small smile. "Your wit can't hide your feelings brother."

Jace felt indifferent at that statement. "Yes, well, I'd prefer not to talk about it thanks."

"I personally think that he deserves all the pain he gets," Said a casual voice from the door way and when they looked they discovered it was Magnus who had spoken.

"_Magnus!_" hissed Alec.

Jace looked at Alec. "No, it's ok Alec his right."

"No his –" Alec began but Magnus spoke over him.

"How could you do that to her? Do you have any idea what you have done?"

Jace smirked. "Yes, I believe I broke up with her."

Magnus's eyes glittered with anger and he strode up to Jace so that his face was in Jace's.

"You killed her that is what you did! She trusted you, and confined in you, and you threw it back in her face! You threw her away like she was another one of your whores!"

"I warned her that you would do this to her," piped in Simon who appeared just as angry as what Magnus did.

"It's not like I wanted to!" Jace exclaimed back feeling like he needed to defend himself.

"Then why did you?" Magnus demanded.

"Because I had to for her safety!" Jace shouted.

"Oh please, what, you thought that one of your ex's were gonna come around and yank her hair and scratch her face until she handed you back over?" Magnus laughed humourlessly.

Jace pushed himself off the counter and stood in front of Magnus.

"_Do not, talk about things you don't understand_," Jace threatened.

Magnus seemed unaffected. "What? Was she not good enough for the high and mighty Jace? Is that it?"

Jace glared but before he knew it, he was being knocked to the tiled floor and his jaw throbbed painfully.

"Magnus!" Alec yelled and went over to help Jace up.

"That's for Clary you asshole," Magnus growled before he stormed out the room.

As Alec helped him up Jace shrugged off his hands. "I'm fine Alec."

Then he started to head for the door but heard Alec and Izzy behind him.

"Where are you going?" Izzy questioned sounding nervous.

Jace shrugged on his leather jacket and grabbed his wallet. "To a bar. I'm not dealing with this shit. Don't wait up for me."

That was all he said before he slammed the door closed behind him.

He started heading towards the bar in town but the froze when he realised that that was the bar that Clary use to work at and the memory of dancing with her nearly made him double over. Instead he turned around and hailed a cab.

Climbing into one the driver turned around to face him. "Where to?"

Jace didn't even think as he replied.

"Red Hook."

Jace didn't care that it was an hour's drive away from Idris; he only cared about getting out of this town that held too many memories for him to bear.

* * *

Clary stepped into the restaurant that Luke had dropped her off at after promising to pick her up when she finished at ten.

Walking in it wasn't what she thought it would be. In fact it was a lot like the old bar that Clary used to work at, and she would call this place a bar but her mother had called it a 'restaurant'. Up at the front of the bar was a stage which she presumed was where she was going to be singing, and the bar was off to the side. The 'tables' that her mother was talking about were small round things that were littered all over the place so that everyone had a place to sit while they watched the entertainment. The only difference between this club and the old one Clary worked at was that this one didn't have a dance floor.

"Ah, you must be Clary," said a man's voice from behind her so she whirled to confront whoever it was.

The man had short black hair that was spiked in all directions and he had lime green eyes. He was fairly tall too; at least six foot so he towered over Clary, and a gold earring hung from his right earlobe.

"Yes," she said shaking his outstretched hand.

The man smiled. "Hi, I'm Mikhail, and I'm the manager here."

Clary smile tentatively back. "Nice to meet you. Thanks for the job too." She said remembering her manners despite what she had said to her mother.

Mikhail waved his hand in front of his face. "Eh! It was no problem. We need more entertainers and your mother said that you were very gifted in singing."

Clary nodded. "Yeah, I guess I am."

Mikhail smiled. "Can you give us a bit of a demo?" he asked hopefully.

At first but then she realised that he wanted her to sing something so she sung the first thing that came to mind.

"_I don't mind spending everyday  
Out on your corner in the pouring rain  
Look for the girl with the broken smile  
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile_  
_And she will be loved  
And she will be loved_."

As she finished singing Mikhail broke into a smile and clapped. "Wonderful! Wow that was excellent!"

Clary smiled. "Thanks."

"Tonight you will be singing 'Behind these hazel eyes' by Kelly Clarkson."

Clary swallowed a groan. '_How ironic that he picks a song that describes exactly how I feel_' clary thought.

Mikhail then put his hand on her back and then began leading her around the back. "Well, let's get you dressed and your hair and makeup done. Everyone will be turning up in an hour and then you will be on!"

Clary let herself be led around the back and pushed into a chair where girls began to curl her hair perfectly and apply her makeup flawlessly.

Just when they finished her makeup she could hear the sound of customers outside and employees beginning their jobs.

One of the girls then handed her a dress. "Here, put this on."

Clary looked at it and realised that it wasn't as revealing as what she thought. It was a long sleeved sequined silver dress that went to her knees and showed just enough cleavage for the dress to make her desirable.

Quickly slipping into the dress she strapped on the four inch back heels that were handed to her and stood in front of the two girls. They smiled at her as if they were proud of what they had accomplished and Clary had to admit that she did look fairly hot.

The second one then handed Clary a wireless microphone and pointed to a door on the left.

"Go that way on the stage rather than going out the front. That way you can just walk up the stairs and nobody will see you until you are on stage.

Clary nodded and made her way over. She was nervous; she was going to be singing in front of a big crowd of people. '_But at least nobody will know me_' Clary thought.

She then heard the sound of Mikhail introducing her onto the stage.

"I would like to welcome our newest entertainer, Clary!"

His voice was followed with the sound of clapping. Taking a deep breath Clary walked onto the stage, a fake smile plastered on her face.

As she walked out she noticed that there were a band two guitarists and a drummer and she gave them all a shy smile which they nodded back with.

As Clary looked around the crowd she saw a head of golden hair that she would recognise anywhere. At the sound of her name, she watched as he choked on his drink and turned to look at her with wide eyes.

Clary stood there staring at Jace with wide eyes and her mouth hanging open.

'_What was he doing here?!_' her head screamed at her. Was it not enough that he had hurt her already and had found her to just hurt her even more? Shaking her head she looked back at the band who were giving her curious looks, silently asking her if she was ok and was ready.

Nodding at them, the drummer tapped his sticks together four times and then they began.

As she sung, she kept her eyes glued to Jace's, so he could both see and hear the pain in her eyes and voice.

_"Seems like just yesterday  
You were a part of me.  
I use to stand so tall,  
I used to be so strong.  
Your arms around me tight,  
Everything it feel so right,  
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong._

_Now I can't breathe, no I can't sleep  
I'm barely hanging on._

_Here I am, Once again.  
I'm torn into pieces.  
Can't deny it, Can't pretend,  
Just thought you were the one.  
Broken up, deep inside,  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry.  
Behind these hazel eyes!_

_I told you everything.  
Opened up and let you in,  
You made me feel alright, for once in my life.  
Now all that's left of me,  
Is what I pretend to be  
So together, but so broken up inside._

'_Cause I can't breathe, no I can't sleep  
I'm barely hanging on._

_Here I am, Once again.  
I'm torn into pieces.  
Can't deny it, Can't pretend,  
Just thought you were the one.  
Broken up, deep inside,  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry.  
Behind these hazel eyes!_

_Swallow me then spit me out  
For hating you I blame myself  
Seeing you it kills me now  
No, I don't cry, on the outside  
Anymore!  
Anymore . . . _

_Here I am, Once again.  
I'm torn into pieces.  
Can't deny it, Can't pretend,  
Just thought you were the one.  
Broken up, deep inside,  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry.  
Behind these hazel eyes!_

_Here I am, Once again.  
I'm torn into pieces.  
Can't deny it, Can't pretend,  
Just thought you were the one.  
Broken up, deep inside,  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry.  
Behind these hazel eyes . . ." _

Once she was finished and the music died down the crowd erupted into cheers, but Clary was fighting back the tears that were threatening to spill out. Looking at Jace one last time she saw that he looked as hurt and heartbroken as what she did which only confused her more.

Making a hasty move, Clary ran backstage so she could just go change and go home so she could cry but of course she wasn't that lucky.

While she was kicking off her shoes a few tears leaked down her cheeks when she heard _his_ voice behind her.

"Clary."

Turning she came face to face with the love of her life.

"Jace."

* * *

**Dun, dun duh! Sorry for another cliff hanger guys, but aren't you proud of me? I got this chapter up a lot quicker than the last one and this was over 6,000 words! I know that there were only 3 scenes in this chapter and not four, but I made up for the long length of the chapter. **

**So don't forget to review and tell me what you thought of this chapter. **

**Question of the day: Do you still hate Jace for breaking up with Clary? Do you think that Magnus's actions against Jace were fair? And what do you think Valentine and Jonathan are up to?**

**~Until next time xoxo**


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